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Facebook Making Me Depressed


Saliency

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Because I spend so much time on the internet, I'm addicted to Facebook. The upside of it is that I get a decent amount of likes on some of my more witty statuses and better looking photos, so I guess I derive some self-esteem from that (which is sad, because it means nothing really). I also feel like I need Facebook to stay in contact with my few remaining close friends, but mostly it just makes me sad. I see photos of all these people who don't like me having a great time and being successful. It makes me so jealous. All these groups of happy young people living their lives together in share houses, having great parties, while I sit at home in my room looking at stupid stuff on the internet to try and take my mind of the fact that my life is a mess. I'm too mentally and physically ill to live my life like all these happy people. Maybe it's time to delete most of the people on my friends list?

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Saliency,

Why not go the full hog and just delete the account altogether? Used to be like you, in that was addicted to it and it used to depress me seeing others going on holidays and me so broke I could barely pay attention. Just did it over one weekend and ya know what ... the sky didn't fall in, the Four Horsemen didn't roll by. In fact, now I feel that if I make the effort to meet true friends, it is more appreciated. Keep in touch with Skype or email, or even better still, make plans to go and visit them over a weekend or so.

FB is a means to fabricate what goes on ... no one is gonna say that they feel down on it, cos you know most of the people are only voyeurs. It shocks me to think that this great tool for sharing information is now just a means of sharing information about tools (aka duma$$es).

Maybe join a society to really help you develop your interests and be brave to take that step outside and be sociable.

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To me it's shallow, imo the only good thing about it is if you want to follow some social group/find out about upcoming events etc. aka practical things. I have account (I think it was generated automatically by google) there, but I almost never use it, unless, as I said, I want to join some kind of a group and want to be informed about its activities.

If you're feeling addicted to it, I would just delete it completely, you can still keep contact with your friends via email or skype.

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Depression doesn't happen because of an addicted to Facebook, or people who don't like me having a great time and being successful.

The symptoms happens because like it or not we have a mental illness. :rock:

I didn't mean that Facebook was causing my depression. I did not mean "depressed" in the clinical sense; I meant it merely in the descriptive sense (i.e. sad). Certain things I see on Facebook get me down, which further contributes to my pre-existing clinical depression.

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Depression doesn't happen because of an addicted to Facebook, or people who don't like me having a great time and being successful.

The symptoms happens because like it or not we have a mental illness. :rock:

Clinical depression isn't the only form of a depression out there. Just saying.

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What we see on facebook isnt the full story please remember that. The persons you may be envying may be feeling worse than you or may have saved years for their vacation or may have just decided to blow all ther saving on it and life pay check to pay check to save it all back. Just remember the truth is rarely ever posted on that site. As for myself 4 years and more no fb and personally it is one of the best decisions i have made with depression

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Sure its like books and kindles ... much prefer to go back to traditional methods. Likewise with friendships ... computers will never replace the better feeling of making the effort and time to go see them in person, rather than get a condensed false picture.

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Hello I deleted my fb account since 1 year but keep making anonymous account :S but I deleted since a few day anyway most of "friend" profile are private.

well I used to enjoy fb a lot, especially those distracting game lol. but saw it was not worth it. I alway felt left out from my friend just like in real life.

It's up to you, it best to delete it or redo you friend list like you said.

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Because I spend so much time on the internet, I'm addicted to Facebook. The upside of it is that I get a decent amount of likes on some of my more witty statuses and better looking photos, so I guess I derive some self-esteem from that (which is sad, because it means nothing really). I also feel like I need Facebook to stay in contact with my few remaining close friends, but mostly it just makes me sad. I see photos of all these people who don't like me having a great time and being successful. It makes me so jealous. All these groups of happy young people living their lives together in share houses, having great parties, while I sit at home in my room looking at stupid stuff on the internet to try and take my mind of the fact that my life is a mess. I'm too mentally and physically ill to live my life like all these happy people. Maybe it's time to delete most of the people on my friends list?

This is something that's very common among prolific facebook users. You might even be surprised.

No one parties every single day. All of those so-called happy people go to work just like you everyday, have to put up with sometimes long shifts, @$$hole co-workers/bosses just like you, have to do all the daily chores at home after work, etc. If they have kids, resposibility doubles. Then they'll eventually have a week-end off of great partying, before going back to work on monday (or sunday for the less fortunate ones).

As long as you go out and have fun from time to time just like them, you're in the 'normal' range. You don't need to party every weekend. That's not realistic.

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I deleted Facebook and it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. Well for me anyways. I too needed to keep it touch with important people but it wasn't worth the torment I out myself through while having it. They say you shouldn't compare yourself to other people, but with Facebook its basically in your face. The number of likes and comments you receive become your self value and that is definitely not ok. And very untrue.

One of the best things I heard which was able to get me off was someone saying that it is not realistic to be exposed to so many people at once. In an average day you are only exposed to several people. The comment made me think long and hard. It made sense why it just seemed superficial, fake, and toxic. If you can i would get the people's phone numbers or other contacts who matter to you and then delete it. Its not an easy decision and you don't have to delete it. just find a way that works best for you. i wish you well!

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I used to be on FB a lot. I hardly go there at all. Now and then I message my friends to keep in touch priovately. My old dr and his wife are retired and have been traveling extensively or visiting with their grandchildren. I think It's great for them after working hard and saving for this time in their life. My sis is addicted to FB but she only communicates with a small circle of "horsy" frienfs or her daughter. She posts many pics of her horses and her grandson and talks about her horsecamping trips. She doesn't party. She doesn't go on "wild" vacations to some exotic destination. Her last real vacation, she went to Texas to visit a lifelong friend who retired there. Many people (and I have a few of them on my FB account) make up stories and post them. I find it ridiculous to lie about stuff you really fon't do IRL/

Sheepwoman

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I've created and deleted a few Facebook accounts. I'd post things like current events and comment on them which never received Likes or comments. I also never had more than 25-30 online friends, which mostly consisted of distant family or acquaintances I rarely see or speak with. I realized that Facebook is too shallow for my taste, as most people are content with posting selfies, memes, and rather lame inspirational quotes. I mean, I get it, it's supposed to be light material for the most part. This is where I think you might get tripped up because you believe everything on Facebook is genuine. What folks are doing is trying to keep an image where others only see the most positive sides of them. It's a bit of a game - much like going to a job interview. I made the mistake of trying to go too deep into issues and soon regret it because I realize it's likely too awkward or controversial to post. It just didn't fit the social scene. Another problem with it is your comments can get interpreted all kinds of ways that wasn't your intention and get you into trouble, especially from people who have a hard time with communicating without tone or visual cues.

You could delete your account. You could just keep it open and not use it if you don't think others will be somehow offended by a lack of interest all of the sudden. Really, if you don't enjoy using it, I'd just bail. You can always go back to it another time if you like.

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Ugh, this is one of the reasons why I deleted by FB account last year and have no plans to reactivate as that would simply be masochism on my part. Like you, it was constant torture being subjected to pics of people's shiny-happy and perfect lives, which they had no problem with flaunting in front of all to see. I initially created an account to try to keep in contact with people from my country of birth, only to find that in the end, it exacerbated my feelings of loneliness and low self worth.

If it makes you feel bad, delete it and keep in touch with those who are true friends via email or phone. I realized that 9$% of the people I had on there were little more than acquaintances anyway, so I was wasting my time and energy by being there.

I'll remain "unplugged" from the Fakebook matrix indefinitely.

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My use of FB is totally self-serving as I have only 50 friends thereon and they are actual friends/acquaintences with whom I like to maintain some contact. I get a lot of spam, recommendations, likes etc and FB is a pain in the neck more often than not. I visit my late wife's page often and for the first year after her death I posted something on her page daily, but now I do so every couple of days or so just to tell her something. It is handy when I travel as I can message people or simply post something on my page. Beyond that I spend little time on it.

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I deactivated my Facebook account for Lent. I actually did this before Ash Wednesday because it was making my depression much worse. I always compare myself to other people and put myself down because of it. Facebook provided me with more opportunities to do so. It was just the normal stuff that upset me so much. Seeing everyone around my age doing stuff with significant others, engagements, new marriages, run of the mill weekend plans. All of the things that I have not and cannot do. All I had to report was geek stuff that no one cared about and depressing thoughts. Sorry, but I can't pretend that everything is hunky dory, like my family wants me to do. Because I am miserable right now. Facebook was compounding the torture I endure on a day to day basis. This is one thing I can control, so I deactivated it. Technically I can allow myself to go back to it on Easter, but why bother if it makes me so miserable? I think I am better off without it, for now.

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Depression doesn't happen because of an addicted to Facebook, or people who don't like me having a great time and being successful.

The symptoms happens because like it or not we have a mental illness. :rock:

Clinical depression isn't the only form of a depression out there. Just saying.

Thanks for pointing that out, as I do tend to lump the following into the term clinical:

  • Major depressive disorder
  • Manic depression (bipolar disorder)
  • Dysthymic depression
  • Situational depression
  • Psychotic depression
  • Endogenous depression

Although Major Depression is the term associated with clinical.

When I am depressed my judgement is nonexisistant to make any rational decision about much of anything, let alone mental illness.

Being sad about life isn't depression, nor should depression and sad be used interchangeablly.

I hear so many times people avoid the word depression and jump into the symptoms as the cause of how they are feeling.

Then, at the same time read a headline as Mary committed suicide because her boyfriend left her which is possible but, what do you think?( ya know )

Somehow we tend to treat the symptom such as quiting Facebook based on the thinking that the depression will be healed.

Which is the cause and which is the effect?

Dusty

Edited by DustyRoad
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My use of FB is totally self-serving as I have only 50 friends thereon and they are actual friends/acquaintences with whom I like to maintain some contact. I get a lot of spam, recommendations, likes etc and FB is a pain in the neck more often than not. I visit my late wife's page often and for the first year after her death I posted something on her page daily, but now I do so every couple of days or so just to tell her something. It is handy when I travel as I can message people or simply post something on my page. Beyond that I spend little time on it.

I'd rather spend time right here on Depression Forum, or other sites that I have a heartfelt interest and want to contribute, grow, and learn with being an active member.

At the same time I may be addicted to this, that, or the other sites, but it is better than watching the news. I really spend lots of time listening to novels. That has been my latest fun thing to do for the past year. I love it.

Note: the word spend rather than waste like FB.

Dusty

Edited by DustyRoad
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Being sad about life isn't depression, nor should depression and sad be used interchangeablly.

Well, how do you call it then? If someones family f.e. dies in a plain crash and they fall into self-destructive path after that and show all the signs of depression, shouldn't you call it that way?

Isn't the plain crash the cause in this situation?

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Being sad about life isn't depression, nor should depression and sad be used interchangeablly.

I hear so many times people avoid the word depression and jump into the symptoms as the cause of how they are feeling.

Then, at the same time read a headline as Mary committed suicide because her boyfriend left her which is possible but, what do you think?( ya know )

Somehow we tend to treat the symptom such as quiting Facebook based on the thinking that the depression will be healed.

Which is the cause and which is the effect?

Dusty

I think these boards show that a lot of people display their depression by feeling sad about life. It may not be the only component required for a diagnosis of clinical depression, but it is a highly indicative symptom. Also, like it or not, depression is both an abbreviation for the various mental illnesses that you have listed and a noun in its own right. I can understand how confusion can arise and people who say they have "depression" tend to be referring to clinical depression these days. But I used the adjective "depressed", which is a synonym for sad and does not have to refer to clinical depression at all. So what I meant by the title of this thread was just "Facebook is making me sad", not "Facebook gave me clinical depression". It seems my particular choice of adjective has created a lot of confusion. I still think it's fine to use "depressed" to mean "sad" though, as you can usually discern what the person means from the context. I don't think many people would proclaim that seeing photos of happy people on the internet gave them a mental illness.

And I do not think that quitting Facebook will get rid of my depression, because as I already noted, it obviously isn't the cause of my depression. My depression leads me to waste time on Facebook, which makes me feel even sadder, which further worsens my depression. It's a vicious cycle. So you are correct in suggesting that spending an excessive amount of time on Facebook is a symptom of the clinical depression, and that the clinical depression is the cause and the time wasted on Facebook is the effect.

Edited by Saliency
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Being sad about life isn't depression, nor should depression and sad be used interchangeablly.

Well, how do you call it then? If someones family f.e. dies in a plain crash and they fall into self-destructive path after that and show all the signs of depression, shouldn't you call it that way?

Isn't the plain crash the cause in this situation?

Suicides caused by an accidental or intentional death of a loved one is not statistically high enough to be relative to draw such conclusions to be listed as a cause. It is not listed as a cause for suicide.

In general, people try to **** themselves for six reasons:

  1. They're depressed. This is without question the most common reason people commit suicide. Severe depression is always accompanied by a pervasive sense of suffering as well as the belief that escape from it is hopeless.
  2. They're psychotic. Malevolent inner voices often command self-destruction for unintelligible reasons. Psychosis is much harder to mask than depression, and is arguably even more tragic.
  3. They're impulsive. Often related to drugs and alcohol, some people become maudlin and impulsively attempt to end their own lives. Once sobered and calmed, these people usually feel emphatically ashamed.
  4. They're crying out for help, and don't know how else to get it. Their true goal of alerting those close to them of their distress has been achieved if the attemp fails.
  5. They have a philosophical desire to die. The decision to commit suicide for some is based on a reasoned decision, often motivated by the presence of a painful terminal illness from which little to no hope of reprieve exists. These people aren't depressed, psychotic, maudlin, or crying out for help. They're trying to take control of their destiny and alleviate their own suffering, which usually can only be done in death.
  6. They've made a mistake. This is a recent, tragic phenomenon in which typically young people flirt with oxygen deprivation for the high it brings and simply go too far. The only defense against this, it seems to me, is education.

I am not saying suicide from grief never happens but isn't staticically significent to be a cause.

Edited by DustyRoad
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Some say that depression is grief pointed inwards.

Grief is a journey,

often perilous and without clear direction,

that must be taken.

The experience of grieving cannot be

ordered or categorized, hurried or controlled,

pushed aside or ignored indefinitely.

It is inevitable as breathing, as change, as love.

It may be postponed, but it will not be denied.

Molly Fumia

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My use of FB is totally self-serving as I have only 50 friends thereon and they are actual friends/acquaintences with whom I like to maintain some contact. I get a lot of spam, recommendations, likes etc and FB is a pain in the neck more often than not. I visit my late wife's page often and for the first year after her death I posted something on her page daily, but now I do so every couple of days or so just to tell her something. It is handy when I travel as I can message people or simply post something on my page. Beyond that I spend little time on it.

I'd rather spend time right here on Depression Forum, or other sites that I have a heartfelt interest and want to contribute, grow, and learn with being an active member.

At the same time I may be addicted to this, that, or the other sites, but it is better than watching the news. I really spend lots of time listening to novels. That has been my latest fun thing to do for the past year. I love it.

Note: the word spend rather than waste like FB.

Dusty

Yup...agreed Dusty. Like I said I just use it to keep in touch with some other athletes and musicians etc. I'd rather spend my time here too. All the best!

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