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In A Real Messy Situation.


ocdgirl

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I can't sleep so I usually take extra klonopin ( like 10 mg ) or the Tylenol PM. But I did like 5 or 6 Tylenol PMs to feel a thing.I'm so anxious at night because I'm trying to relax. So the only thing I know how to do is try to call my mind. Yeah it's kinda counterproductive because then , all I do is end up thinking about all the things I don't want to think about ...... because I have nothing to preoccupy me. Cuz I'm laying in bed trying to sleep.Someone gave me some 5 milligram ambiens.And I was taking like 7 of them in a pop.I was delusional and I loved it. As crazy as that sounds. I was actually at peace. Because my mind had shut the f*** up.I told the Dr that all I feel is fear ,guilt, low self esteem, no motivation feel like locking myself in a room .She says I'm going to depression again. But those are obvious signs of depression. So what the f*** to do about it. Do I Just keep increasing and keep increasing and keep increasing and keep increasing. I feel like my life is just about how high my dose can go. And the excessive eating at night while I'm awake is out of control. I'm in a bad spot right now and I don't know how to get out of it. I feel like taking over my life. I give up things to appease my OCD.

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Wow, Im surprised you woke up at all with 7 ambiens. Maybe ask your doc if a different med might help you. There are many out there. I once had to try 8 before something worked. Luckily my pdoc said even tho we had pretty much ran the gamut of them, he never gave up before and wouldnt now. So luckily we landed on something that did work.

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Hey sorry you're going through an extra rough time at the moment, for what it's worth I wouldn't go upping doses of things especial if you're taking more than one kind of drug it can get.. messy, definitely see your doctor.

Do you have any hobbies that could provide a distraction? I have a guitar I like to make cry with my awful playing whenever I've restless, either that or a snes emulator n_x;;

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Beck, abusing your meds will do you no good. Please don't do that, it's dangerous and is not worth the temporary releif, cause in the long haul it actually makes things much worse. You are MUCH more then your mentall ilness, your mentall ilness doesn't make you, it's just something you currently have to deal with. See the word I just used ? " Currently " I don't care what anyone says, MANY people have recovered from mental illness. It takes effort no doubt, but it can be done. If you are having thoughts about self-harm or actually doing acts of self-harm, please reach out for professional help.

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Hey sorry you're going through an extra rough time at the moment, for what it's worth I wouldn't go upping doses of things especial if you're taking more than one kind of drug it can get.. messy, definitely see your doctor.

Do you have any hobbies that could provide a distraction? I have a guitar I like to make cry with my awful playing whenever I've restless, either that or a snes emulator n_x;;

I did see my Doctor. I'm getting anywhere. Nothing a the moment is clamming me down. Not even my Guitar.

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Wow, Im surprised you woke up at all with 7 ambiens. Maybe ask your doc if a different med might help you. There are many out there. I once had to try 8 before something worked. Luckily my pdoc said even tho we had pretty much ran the gamut of them, he never gave up before and wouldnt now. So luckily we landed on something that did work.

Sometimes, I wonder if I was trying to **** myself with those ambiens.

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