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Episode Length


Softball4

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I thought it would be interesting to see how long everyone's longest depressive episode was. Maybe add what kind of treatment you have tried and if it worked.:) also, when one comes out of an episode does it happen gradually or quickly. Just a few questions I've been thinking about.

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Softball,

Longest one had to be an intense 3 month, but even thinking about it now, the genus of it was about for 2-3 years and then it caught up. It was a gradual recovery, taking about 6 months, but it is every day that I have to remind myself of how I came out of it when making decisions i.e. could be anxious over making 2-3 decisions in a day. But now, a bit more decisive and what can get done today, gets done today, which helps a lot!

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Thank u for your reply. I have a loved one with depression and sometimes it's tough to hang in there and be pushed away. I have been educating myself on depression in order to try not to take things personal and be there. It's been hard but I think that it will be worth it. It sounds like u have improved and continue to :) have u went to therapy? Or taken medicine? I have a little anxiety myself but nothing major. I know my loved one defintly has trouble concentrating and making decisions!!

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I thought it would be interesting to see how long everyone's longest depressive episode was. Maybe add what kind of treatment you have tried and if it worked.:) also, when one comes out of an episode does it happen gradually or quickly. Just a few questions I've been thinking about.

My depression is under control but only because of my medication. It took almost 2 months on meds before I could feel the depression being put back in the box.

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Not counting my current episode, my previous ones have gone for about 4 months of very severe phase. Followed by a 2-3 month gradual "softening". I did not feel fully "normal" again until a good 9 months after the depression started. But as far as the really intense, non-functioning phase...that was about 4 months.

As far as your other questions: I beat one episode with meds(Prozac) +Club Med vacation+friends. But there was another episode (2005) when even meds could not pull me out. I needed Electroconvulsive Therapy (ECT). That finally pulled me out of the deep, deadly pit that I was in. I continued getting ECT for a while. It is not good to stop it cold turkey, it needs to be tapered gradually. But I started feeling a noticable difference around my 4th or 5th treatment.

Coming out of it is always gradual. Like climbing a very long, shallow staircase back into the light of day.

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Thank you so much for your repliy! I know it can vary with everyone!!! I can't even imagine feeling so terrible for so long.:( I'm so glad that treatment has helped somewhat! I'm sure it is very hard to imagine you are going to get better while its happening. I have been trying to learn all I can so that I can be a good support to my best friend. This illness is horrible for those that have it and also hard for those closest.

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Softball,

You are right that it can vary and also comes in many forms. You are a very decent person for seeking out this information for someone else - most others would bury their head in the sand and say "snap out of it already!". Meds, in my opinion, only level the ship - it is through the work of theraphy and self-reflection that the real recovery starts. Theraphy and having someone there that is non-judgemental is crucial to stop the person being totally harsh on themselves, which, as anyone here will tell is another companion of the Black Dog!

But, more importantly, you take care of yourself too. You are a warrior for helping a loved one, but it is a bit like the blind leading the blind (which is why I commend you seeking out information here). If you don't know what to expect, then that anxiety builds up in you. Make sure to talk to others about how YOU are feeling as this is a trying time. We here at the forum will of course be always glad to answer questions, or just be here for you, or your loved one, if they want to join.

Is mise le meas,

Stonium

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Stonium

Thank you very very much for your reply. Thank you for taking the time to care about my feelings in this. Your right, it can be like the blind leading the blind. This person was a major part of my life as well as me being a big part of hers. I guess I've been through many emotions throughout this. Hurt, fear, love, anger, and frustration. It's like waving your arms in front of someone that can't see. I know it's not her fault and she is just trying to get through this. Right now, I think I'm one of the last people she wants to see or talk to. She is able to "pretend" with others in her life but with me she is closed off and has walls. She has even said that much. She avoids anything emotional but I have continued to tell her I love her. Even when I don't get a reply. That's ok. At first I really thought this was my fault. She came back from a trip in march or 2013. I stayed at her house and took care of her pets, detailed her car, printed off all of the pictures she sent to my phone. I also took cre of her older mother. The whole time she was gone she texted me saying she missed me and next time I was going its her!!! She had never been able to relax like that and know everything at home ws in great hands!!! She even brought me a shirt and watch back.

This trip was good for her. In 2008 she lost her father, in jan of 2012 she lost her husband whom she took care of for 10 years never knowing if she was going to have to call an ambulance or not, in nov 2012 her father in law was diagnosed with an incureable illness. She had so much happen at once and needed this trip. In January of 2013 I noticed her having what I now know as panic attacks. She would have moments of chest pain, rapid breathing, numbness and tingling, etc..... We even took her to the hospital once. She also complained of trouble concentration, headaches, stomach pain, tiredness, and lack of motivation. I noticed she started avoiding emotional things also. I would say love ya and she would say ditto instead.

When she got back from the trip she acted rested. However, the following week we had dinner. She got very irritable with me. I told her I noticed something was off and asked her why she was acting irritable and mean to me. She uncharacteristicly became frantic. Saying she has let 3people close and two have died. I was the third and I was having a heart surgery coming up. She said some really rude things in her panic and I know she didn't mean them. Anyways, I believe that night when I left her house, because I couldn't say or do anything right... She had a nervous breakdown. I had told her I would talk to her later and even texted that evening about how sorry I was for my part In whatever that was. The next day, after work I went by her house and cried as I told her I'm sorry for my part in that and we hugged and everything seemed to be ok for a couple of weeks.

Then I noticed how withdrawn she became. She became very irritable and would not agree to do anything anymore. She was someone who texted me good morning, and we texted throughout the day and then at night. And waked daily.... I continued to apologize because I thought it was me. And I would ask her what is happening. At this point I had no idea. I have to admit I tried to reach her in many ways, sending nice messages, getting angry etc.... I was hurt. And one day she said that she couldn't focus on long messages. And she told me that the night I was with her and she had what I believe was a nervous breakdown freaked her out. She said she has unconditional love for me but she couldn't explain what was happening. She said she had been seeing a therapist and started taking medications.

I asked why I could do to help and she said nothing. No one can make me happy. With me she acted down and acted like she forgot how to smile and with others she was over the top loud and friendly Smiling. Again I took this personally until I started realizing something bigger was happening. We will talk some and if I say anything nice about her or she thinks conversation is going anywhere but the weather she will stop replying. I haven't heard from her in a week right now. The holidays were hard because we always saw each other on Christmas and New Years and I never even heard from her this year.

I started talking to a therapist about this and they told me that they think she knows she is pushing me away but can't help it. She can't act like everything is ok with me and knows I will immediately know something is wrong and ask if she is ok. She has been throwing herself in work and she will sometimes do things with people who have no idea this is going on. I have told her I'm not giving up and I will always be here. Have told her it doesn't matter how long it takes and I apologized for anything I contributed to this problem. I told her that I may not have handled things correctly at first and took things personally but I think I understand a bit better now. I told her that I will never abandon her no matter how much she pushes. I won't pressure her but I'm going to stand by and be ready when she wants to come back to this friendship. My therapist said that she will, but it will take time. I was the closest to her and was pushed way back because not only is she struggling but she has a fear of loved ones getting sick and dying. I'm sorry this is long but I so appreciate getting this out.

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