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What Helps You To Keep Fighting Depression?

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I've been depressed for awhile. I can't find a reason to fight anymore. It's so hard.. This pain I feel everyday.. I lost faith in god. I see no future for me. I hate myself, I don't like who I am so what's the point in trying.. Please, I'm 19, and I really need some motivation right now. I don't have one reason. I'm trapped alone.. Nobody cares.

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I have a dream of the person I want to be, of the life I could possibly have if I could just get over all of the crap I have going on in my head. I think about the person I could be: confident, happy, successful, personable, possibly having a relationship with someone. It's not easy, but I am not ready to give up at this point. You still have your entire life ahead of you, maybe you don't have any specific goals in mind (I don't either), but your world is still full of possibilities, as hard as that may be to believe right now. It's funny I posted something similar to this a week ago to the day, and I am currently feeling a lot better, so that is how quickly things can change. Are you seeking help for how you are feeling (therapist, psychiatrist, etc)?

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I tried pulls but threw them away because I didn't want that title over my head, to be crazy and on meds. I don't seek treatment because of that, its the way my family makes me feel. I've talked to everyone in my family about it, nobody knows how to help and I don't know how to help me. I've wasted almost two in a half years doing nothing. Sitting around the house feeling sorry for myself. I'm so sick of it. Thanks for the reply-

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You don't have to be on medication for the rest of your life, it can just be for a couple of years until you start to feel better. It's your choice but if you want my opinion you should take them.

Take care.

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Only an opinion....but since you are asking....

You simply cannot give up the struggle at 19 years old. Doing nothing has not helped for the last two years. You say you are sick of it....then you have to be pro-active and actually try something. The first thing you try might not work, you may have to try something else....until you find something that makes a difference. You are most likely so far down you might need help with meds of some sort on a temporary basis to get back on track. Meds and and "crazy" should not be words you link together in your mind. Has someone maybe made that comment to you?? If so I am sorry--that shows a great lack of understanding on the part of anyone who would IMO.

Try to find joy in the simple things each day...a cup of coffee...a song...a pet...or whatever you like or fits your personality.

Above all I guess I would encourage you to begin being proactive with some sort of "plan." Doing "more of the same"--- in your case you say you really haven't done anything to try to help--isn't working. What do you have to lose?

People do care---they just don't always know how to help what they don't understand. Don't give up! :)

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Hey individualized,

I know it can be really hard to think about a positive future or to find the motivation to keep going when you're depressed. That's what the illness does, it saps our strength and makes us lose hope. There was a time when I was very close to giving up but I eventually found a treatment that worked for me. I understand that there is a lot of stigma surrounding mental illness and that getting help can be really hard, but I think it's important that you try again. If you had another illness like diabetes or heart disease, you would take medication for it right? Depression is a legitimate illness that usually needs professional treatment, like most other illnesses. I'm not even saying you should take medication necessarily (that is only one of many options to treat depression), just that you should get help from a professional, like a doctor or therapist. You said in your post that your family doesn't know how to help and you don't know how to help yourself. That's the case for most of us with depression, which is why we need help from others. Depression is very treatable, but you've got to give the treatments a chance.

I waited for years before I got proper treatment and I got sicker than I needed to because of it. If I could go back and change one thing in my life I would get help sooner and I strongly urge you to do the same. It's never too late and with the right help you won't have to keep feeling this way. I wish you all the best,

Ophelia

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Juda,

You seem like you are really just ignoring your depression, and living, but not really happy. Also, I understand the whole get out and do something attitude, but you have to realize that some people can't, some people have depression that causes such debilitating physical symptoms that they literally can't get out of bed and will actually go to the bathroom in their beds. You have the kind of view that assumes depression isn't an actual illness and people are just lazy for not changing their lives. I don't know, you say you don't seek professional help, but it sounds like it would benefit you as you seem pretty p*****.

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Well I think the very fact that you're here asking that question, is your way of showing that you want to keep fighting. You haven't given up because you're seeking help to move on. If as you say you're going nowhere then something needs to change. You've made your surroundings your prison. You need to change what is around you otherwise it will simply reiterate what you believe about yourself, that nothing's ever going to change,that you're always going to be in this state.

Despite what we believe we actually do have the strength to bring about change, for ourselves, but you and you alone will have to move.Aaahh that all sounds simple then and believe me I know it's not, I've suffered from depression for years and I knew all the answers knew everything everyone said was true but did I take any advice, no, because it was easier to stay in my self made world where I didn't have to do anything more frightening than talk to someone on the phone or sign on or go to the shops, then I could close my door and begin all over again until the next time.

The only reason that anything happened was because I realised I was tired of doing the same thing without result. I almost got fed up with being depressed. I couldn't stand looking at myself in the mirror because I reminded myself of what a failure I was. All I know is you've got to want to change. The only help and advice I can offer is make small changes.

Set yourself a challenge a goal and work out how you're going to achieve it, what you'll need to achieve it. Give it your full attention and don't think of anything else. It could be something like today I'm going to walk to the end of the road. So you work out what time you're going to do it, will you need anything to do it, such as walking shoes, an umbrella how long will it take you.

Prepare everything you'll need to achive it the day before, then do it and then see what happened. How did you feel was it easier harder. Write your experiences down and if it was too much change the goal and so on. You may find that you have particular problems in doing something, but whatever happens you have to stick to the goal and adapt it until you achieve it.

When you achieve it give yourself a treat.

davey118 is absolutely right, depression isn't feeling a bit down or sad it's as debilitating as being unable to walk, think,breathe at times. This why choosing your won goals and starting with tiny goals may work for you. If thinking about the future makes you more depressed then don't think about it, none of us know what's around the corner, there could be as much good as bad waiting for you out there. I don't know if any of this will help but what I'm trying to say is, one be good to yourself allow yourself time to achieve things it will take youlonger than others, so small steps.

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The truth is that depression is a daily battle most of us go though each and every day, some being more severe then others.

What has helped me is being on anti-depression medication for the last two years. I don't care anymore about what people think of the pills, I rather take them and feel better then suffer through major depression.

Seeing a therapist also helps. I saw a therapist for a 1.5 years and stopped about a year ago but started seeing one again. Just having the abililty to talk to someone, even if you're paying them, helps me cope a little.

Adopting a puppy. I got an 8 week old Border Collie Aug 2011 and boy do they keep you busy. She's my best friend, watches tv and sleeps with me. I actaully talk to her..lol.

The other thing that helps is that I absolutely hate being depressed and I'll do anything to get out of it. So many times I've just wanted to lay in bed, sleep and do nothing but I literally force myself to get up and do work around the house, go take a walk or go out and get dinner. I find any project around the house or car to do, sometimes just making stuff up just to have something to do. Let me tell you, this is not easy but I just can't stand the depresspesion that I just force myself to do anything (I even talk to myself and my puppy to modivate me..lol).

To recap. Pills, therapy, pet, exercise, stay busy. I also play puzzle games on my Andriod phone which helps me cope a little.

These things have helped me better cope with my depression. They're not a cure and don't work for everyone, but you have to try something.

Laz

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Nothing. I've reached a sort of armistice. If I try to feel good that just leads to feeling bad so I try to feel as little as possible and it works most of the time.

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Recently I have been pointed in the direction of mindfulness by my counsellor. It has helped hugely with regard to an obsessive thought I was having but the novelty of it has worn off now and it's a real struggle to keep focused on its principles i.e. observe thoughts as objects passing through your mind, notice them, even give them a name BUT DO NOT ENGAGE WITH THEM. Be non judgemental towards them i.e. don't be upset for having the thought just let the thought be. Then the thought will pass from your mind and you have not done anything to increase the depression around it.

I am finding that I am having thousands of thoughts, all negative a day so it is exhausting trying to do the above exercise. But I have had success with it so far so I'll keep going.

A good book on the topic is the Mindful Way through Depression written by amongst others Mark Williams and Jon Kabit-Zinn.

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My first depressive episode I was 18, it took me a few months to move on after I started medication...But I am a 32 year old who has just recently had another episode. I have a bachelors degree, a daughter, a husband, and even though it's tough, it can and will get better. One thing I will say, is that if you worry too much about others you will not get the help you need. The only thing we can do is assume we know how others are doing. No one has to know. And the last thing you ever tell anyone with depression is that they just need to stop feeling sorry for themselves and move on and get out...well no crap, if that was the cure we'd all be doing awesome. Sometimes its more than us. Get help, go to therapy, and take it a day at a time...one day you will wake up and go outside. Then the next few days maybe you'll get ready for the day, but some days, just breathing is enough. Be compassionate to yourself.

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I don't like pills either, never tried them, suffered a deep depression and was suicidal for the last two years. I've been there, possibly for different reasons but that doesn't matter. My best advice, though I don't know you and you may just brush this off...but get outside and RUN. I started running, ended up running a marathon - felt like forrest gump. But it helped me a lot, I still run and I keep busy. If I don't my mind wins and I sit around doing nothing. You are young, you have your life ahead of you and you have ABSOLUTELY no idea what will happen in the future. It may actually be quite exciting, you don't know, but you'll never know if you aren't around to see it. So stop feeling sorry for yourself, pick yourself up and go outside. Enjoy the weather regardless of what it is, if its raining get soaked, if its sunny soak it in. Exercise is better than pills and is great for not only releasing natural things your body needs, but getting fit will help your self esteem and make you feel like you can do anything. So go...go do something, and smile after you accomplish it. You are better than this. Your family can't help you because they don't feel your pain, they are not in your shoes, only you can help you. That is a hard thing to hear sometimes because you want to feel loved and that you would missed maybe? Well you would be missed, end of story and if you change your ways people will start to be more receptive to you and you won't feel so alone anymore. Good luck!

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I keep going because of my family(my pets are also my family)

Unlike what some person has said you just can`t snap out of it.I completely understand that.I think that attitude about mental illness is completely false.That attitude is what makes it difficult for some people to seek treatment.I understand that it`s difficult for you right now and it doesn`t make any difference how old you are.Depression is depression.It hurts.I hope you do seek out treatment.You are worth it.

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I keep going because of my family(my pets are also my family)

Unlike what some person has said you just can`t snap out of it.I completely understand that.I think that attitude about mental illness is completely false.That attitude is what makes it difficult for some people to seek treatment.I understand that it`s difficult for you right now and it doesn`t make any difference how old you are.Depression is depression.It hurts.I hope you do seek out treatment.You are worth it.

I totally agree and I'm kind of annoyed at the posters who seem to think that a person can simply snap out of it. It's not about self-pity. And I REALLY hate it when people say things like, "you're young, you have your whole life ahead of you". Age has no bearing on depression because plenty of young people struggle with it and to them, they don't have their whole life ahead of them. Depression can shorten a person's life and diminish their quality of life in many ways. Not trying to attack anyone, just pointing out that everyone is different and some people battle intensely with this.

Back on topic...what keeps me going is that I don't want to hurt my mother by taking my own life. She means the world to me. I'm her only child. I couldn't bear the thought of doing that to her. I also don't want to hurt my husband, although I feel like a burden to him sometimes.

There are also some things that I still love/enjoy that are somewhat free in life, so I guess it isn't always bad. I wouldn't be able to enjoy those things anymore if I died. I try to keep hope alive despite my depression and my outlook in general.

Like yesterday, I took a chance on something for the first time in years. I took a shower, put on some clothes, and went out with the aim of finding a job. Nothing came of my attempt...but at least I can say I tried. I'm trying to make myself believe that not all hope is lost.

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What about going to a local psychiatric hospital? There are a lot of people who will understand you there, they have programs, etc.....

I've been depressed for awhile. I can't find a reason to fight anymore. It's so hard.. This pain I feel everyday.. I lost faith in god. I see no future for me. I hate myself, I don't like who I am so what's the point in trying.. Please, I'm 19, and I really need some motivation right now. I don't have one reason. I'm trapped alone.. Nobody cares.

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