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Seeing Couples Makes Me Suicidal


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every time i am out and about and i see couples together it makes me want to just give up and end it all. since i lost my significant other i have not nor can not meet anyone. i am sure its because of my age, 40 and of course i know its because of my looks that have diminished since i have started drinking and drugging heavily. of course having a extreme case of low self esteem and anxiety doesnt help matters either. i mean lets face it, does therapy and medicine actually work at all? now i understand why my kids mother took her life, she wanted out of this disgusting, cruel, selfish, self centered, shallow world. maybe its my destiny to be with her taking a dirt nap.

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I know how you feel bad about seeing couples being happy, I am scared of being alone too.

When I see couples out in public displaying acts of affection I just want to scream at them to stop!

And about the "dirt nap" your kids need you now more than ever.

As far as therapy, yeah it can work if you are able to accept it. As far as the medicine it can help but it doesnt fix the problem.

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I definitely know how you feel. It seems so unfair that we have illnesses that others don't have. Why? Why? Why do we have to go through this? I don't have much to offer in the way of help, as I feel exactly as you do, but please know that by you coming on these boards you do have value and maybe you can offer support to someone else who needs it. That's what I hope for myself as my world continues to fall apart all around me.

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Hey Carbie,

I can relate to how you feel, I'm coming up on 36 and before this I was married and now I wish so badly that I was in a long-term relationship again. But here's the good news, online dating has been working for me and I beleive it could work for you. It's hard for me not to want to rush in too fast and I haven't found that truly special someone yet but dating again has been pretty good, it just feels good, corny as the saying is, to be "out there again" (I promise that's the last cliché I'll use). I also had some pretty decent luck with speed-dating, these things are becoming more and more accepted now to the point that it's almost the norm. Yes, it can be frustrating because it's totally a numbers game, hitting up 20 people just to get one decent response, but then again I have to just be myself and remind myself "if they can't be bothered to reply, why should I care to be with them?". Some positive self-talk can go a long way in our situation. Have you tried any of the above so far?

I've had to remind myself of a lot of things in order to get myself back in the game. For instance, that there are so many (attractive) people in the world and life situations come up such as loss of a significant other or divorce/breakup, and all these people are out there for us. That I can't possibly be the only one feeling this lonely, if there's one lonely person in the world there's a million, that's a scientific fact as far as I'm concerned. There's a reason that half the stupid movie that hollywood churns out are romantic comedies, and that's because so many of us are looking for romance.

And by the way, I totally resonated with wanting to puke my guts out everytime I see a happy couple, lol. It's like, the first thought is "why can't that be me" and yet the feeling is instant revulsion... I feel ya man.

Also, go Giants!

-Lane

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I use to feel the same way. I dated the same girl from when I was 19 till I turned 27, then she dumped me for another man after my dad died and I got very depressed. After that, when I seen couples together in a mall holding hands, I would cry. I was scared of being alone, so I joined online dating and met a ton of people to date. I also met my wife on there. Well ex-wife now, since that didn't last. So I became more depressed when I was single again. I would settle for anyone online, even women that were not my type, just so I would have someone. Even drove 5-8 hours doing the long distance relationships. They NEVER work, unless you plan to move to be with them.

But I admit, I was a very good looking guy. 6'2", 240lbs, tanned, natural wavy hair. Never had problems meeting people, even with depression and social anxiety. Boy, has that changed! I'm 39 years old now, balding so I cut my hair very short, white as a ghost, have a big chip in the front tooth and weigh 325lbs. No women even wants to come close to me. They HATE obese men. Plus, I no longer have a good paying job. I'm on disability and make $10 an hour part time and take a bus, since I lost my vehicle. I couldn't even imagine meeting anyone now to date.

But I see couples now, holding hands and it doesn't even bother me. Odds are, these couples won't be together long. Dating and relationships have changed. People can't be with the same person for long without being bored of them.

So I say screw it! I'd rather be alone, rather than temporarily happy with someone, knowing it probably won't last, then be very miserable again.

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i am actively drinking and drugging so i highly doubt any self respecting women would want anything to do with me. i did recently try to get clean, i wasted 45 days because i was the most angry, depressed, scared out of my wits that i have ever been. i went to outpatient and the groups sucked bad, the other patients either never showed up or they would dominate the group and you couldnt talk about anything at all. i went to AA here and that was a complete and utter joke, i wasnt welcomed AGAIN. this would be the second time i tried and the same people rejected me, so why do i want to live? i am slowly hurting myself and i guess this is my life until i am gone, nothing will take the pain and suffering away, NOTHING

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"Hand in glove.

The sun shines out of our behinds.

No, it's not like any other love--

this one is different because it's ***ours***.

-Morrissey

please dont think i am being rude, but i dont understand what your post is suppose to mean

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i understand the misery my last relationship just failed...after 5 years and i live with my best friend and he and he man have been together for 15 years and its like a tv relationship and i cant even get a date seeing them so in love makes me feel worthless and hopeless that i will never find that kind of love because relationships are so different now..and they met when they were in high school so they are eachothers first loves so it is very intense...i would be happy if someone would take me on a date and just tell me i look nice :( and pda is so depressing especially when i dont knowof one person out there worth dating that wants me back...

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