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What Are You Proud Of Today?


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Today I played a game with friends, a type of game that I almost always avoid because it is triggery for me. I have worked up to playing this type of game for a while now, by taking baby steps, as sort of a growth exercise, because I know it's something I need to get past. Anyway I played it, and was totally triggered, and felt the anxiety rising and almost freaked out a couple of times, I wasn't sure if I was going to make it through the game or not. But I stayed through it, didn't cry, and didn't have to go outside for a panic attack, although I thought I might have to at one point. I kept it together and didn't show outward signs that I was freaking out, and managed to finish the game without quitting. So that is what I am proud of.

Edited by stardreamer
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At the laundromat I saw a half empty bottle of a sports drink someone has discarded by the curb.  Ants and other bugs were crawling in and drowning because they could not crawl out.  I emptied the drink, made sure there were no more bugs inside, an threw it into a trash can.  Couldn't help the bugs that already died, but at least no more bugs will die in there. 

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I'm taking on extra work in the new season, leading a choir. I've never lead a choir. The idea scares me a bit because you can't just wing it, I have to come up with arrangements for them to sing. 
It was my plan to basically do that during the holiday so I wouldn't have to worry about the extra stress when I've started working. But I have been so depressed lately that I can't even finish preparing a meal, let alone do something creative. 

I just pushed myself and finished an arrangement for I'll Be There For You by the Rembrandts (the Friends theme song). I'm proud I got myself to finish it even though I wanted to give up all the time!

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  • 2 weeks later...

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