Recovery

[Hope4life]

Hi Hope4Life,

Thanks for replying. I'm actually taking L. acidophilus and B. longum (normal gut bacteria) and 1.5 g of melatonin at night. I actually feel normal-I can't believe it.

I was very desperate over xmas - actually wrote 'goodbye notes'. I did take all kinds of vitamins and minerals in my time of desperation then stopped because I didn't want to just blindly start stuffing myself with vitamins/minerals thereby introducing too many variables to determine what works for me. I did what all people struggling with depression (and doctors) say not to do - I went off my meds without doctor supervision. I have been on them for 10 years. [side note and something to think about: Did you know that 95% (my statistics not based on much) of the pharmaceutical meds out there have an unknown mechanism of action?] I just wanted out of the depression, and believe that naturally is the way to go. For anyone reading this, PLEASE DO NOT BE FOOLISH LIKE ME AND GO OFF YOUR MEDS UNLESS YOUR UNDER THE CARE OF A DOCTOR (naturopathic or traditional). PLEASE KNOW THAT I AM NOT ENCOURAGING ANYONE TO GO OFF THERE MEDS - IT CAN BE FATAL. It was scary, and I think I went through a hypomanic phase for about 2-3 weeks (I came off Effexor and Wellbutrin). It's scary because I worry about relapse, but after my 'close call' over xmas, I'm determined to beat this depression.

I've read a lot of published papers on mercury (a neurotoxin) from dental amalgam, and decided to have my fillings removed (planned for 23 Feb06). I've also read up on the 'yeast connection', hence the reason I'm taking L. acidophilus and B. longum. If I remember correctly, L. acidophilus produces tryptophan which is an amino acid that may aid in alleviating depression. It also repopulates your normal gut bacteria, aids in nutrient absorption, and controls yeast overgrowth). I read 1 journal abstract about melatonin - it was a very small study, maybe 20-30 people - they found that evening melatonin levels in patients with major depressive disorder were significantly lower that the control subjects, hence the reason I'm taking melatonin at night. I've also read up on orthomolecular medicine/psychiatry. I've also seen much information on how acupuncture, yoga and meditation aids in alleviating depression (I haven't done this recently, but I know in the past, it has helped me). I guess I'm trying to say that I'm not doing this blindly and have supportive friends with whom I discuss what I am doing, and I watch for and talk about any signs of depression.

I have an appointment with a naturopathic doctor in 2 days to discuss a nutrition/detox program needed to remove the mercury from my system. I'm also going to discuss orthomolecular psychiatry with her.

In short, I feel really good. I'm cleaning my house, I'm calling people (just to say hi) that I've been out of touch with because I've simply been to depressed to want to socialize (this is huge for me). My refrigerator is full (and full of healthy foods!). I feel like I'm back after being gone for 10 years.

I know this was a little longwinded, but I wanted to share some information to maybe give some other people hope, just a little information on alternate ways of treating depression, and let them know that maybe we don't have to live and struggle with depression for life. I can only hope that I don't relapse.

Naturally

Hi Naturally,

As I mentioned in my last post I also had my mercury fillings removed and replaced with plastic composites (wich I plan to also have removed because of recent research) anyway, you mentione a mercury detox, did you have a blood test done to measure the mercury levels ? I havn't had that done, and since the dentist I had wasn't really qualified in mercury removal, I think I'm going to get the blood test just to make sure.

Also If you like to post, I would be interested in knowing if you have any further results from naturall medicine.

Thanks

Daryl

[kevv729]

To Me it is more like a Understanding and gaining Knowledge so I can understand My depression. Recovery I guess for Me is the Understanding that I can yet learn to Live Life in the end. My depression is recurrent with moderate severity so it really nevers truly goes away. In this way I have yet learned to Live to see a new day.

[tinybit]

recovery to me is something i struggle with more on some days than others. i think i've came along ways since i first came here a few years back. i just live day by day. and i use that prayer alot the serenity prayer. i'm told we never fully recover. but who knows. with meds. and prayer and other stuff, nothing is impossible. i try to belive that at times any ways.

[MaryCatherine]

For most people setting goals is part of recovery, however small or large.

[rosasinespina]

I created a private Livejournal specifically for the outline you've shown us! I will use it to chronicle my progress. Thanks so much; now I feel optimistic about my future thinking of all the things I want to accomplish!

[truthseeker]

I define my recovery as regaining the desire for life.

When I am unwell, I have no desire for life, or the things that happen in life. But when I am feeling well, I am absorbed in the act of living and the joy of life events happening.

[membrain]

My recovery:

Long, painful, exhausting, but totally worth it.

I can feel things again. The fog is thining. Emerging into a new world.

I can push through the rough bits and come out even stronger.

I'm starting to like this.

Membrain

[Alisa]

oh my gosh

thank you so much for this!!! This helps A LOT

[sober4life]

For me I haven't recovered at all. I'm always at square one. I feel just as bad or worse than I did when I started taking meds about 11 years ago.

[Jkm]

You have our support and having this is a big part of recovery, Ihatelife!! We're here for you especially when the negative thinking that depression produces gets in your way!

Sometimes, just paying attention to these thoughts and deciding that they aren't going to rule you anymore is a start........ Just because you have a thought about something doesn't mean it's true, or I'd have been in bed for the last two years.

Wish I could be more help, but this is a world where you have to fight for what you want and for some of us, it starts between our ears. I have had social anxiety forever, but only when I get depressed does it stop me in my tracks. I used to drink at social events to get through them, but you can't do this at everything, so I quit going.

With meds, it's some better.

Jackie

[blueoyster]

for me, recovery is to no longer experience the symptoms of depression.

i will no longer be overwhelmed by guilt

i will be hopeful

i will feel valuable to society

i will be able to concentrate and be in the moment

i will remember the things that are important

i will be able to make and feel good about decisions

i will have the energy to accomplish what i desire

i will feel calm and be at peace

i will under no circumstances be suicidal

[2behappy]

My recovery isn't going they way I want it then again, a lot hasn't gone they way I thought

it would. I'm trying to take life each day, I'm trying to push myself to feel better. I guess I'm waiting

for that A-HA moment in life. I try to find inspresional words, or I try to write and post things on my

bathroom mirror telling myself, I'm a good person, beautiful, strong, and wonderfully made women.

it helps sometimes. And my counselor wants me back on meds, which I don't because I feel they don't do anything, just helps me cost along. Time will tell I suppose.

[violetspike]

Right now I'm sort of laughing at my recovery because I feel I'm so much better one moment and the next the pain is so bad I just can barely believe it. I am still trying. I see a game of see- saw going on. The wood is rotting and the screws are loose. Yeah, screws loose.

[nhsnotp2scratch]

It used to be living with no medication for me, but its unrealistic for me in the next year as I'm on quite a lot.

I think now its: making profound changes in my life, that, subsequently lead to steady, gradual and permanent recovery, including going back to work and stop being a perfectionist.

Such a good thread and answers!xx

Nhs...

[Belle29]

When I believe I am worth something

When I stop denying things to myself and to others

When I stop pretending things are ok when they're not

When I become less of a people pleaser

When I have energy and motivation

When I am able to cry again

Belle xx

[smikette]

remission is a better word

that's perfect. recovery to me means getting better once and for all. that hasn't happened for me. i have 'well' times, interupted by 'bad' spells. defintiely feels like remission.

[deepdiver]

For me, recovery is able to enjoy my life the fullest, without any medication. Able to cope with pressure again.

I have this vision about depression. It is me, sitting in a dark corner, hugging my knees. I don't want to be in that place. Recovery is when I am out there in the beach, white sands, crystal clear ocean and sunshine.

And I am recovering. A little bit more time and I'm off my meds!

[hedgehog]

For most people setting goals is part of recovery, however small or large.

[Starberry]

What a great idea! I seem to set goals, and at the first attempt when they don't succeed I tend to just give up, convinced it just won't work for me.

But these questions sound reasonable, so I will try again!

Thank you!

~ Star

[OceanBreeze9721]

I was just thinking about this, sometimes in therapy its so easy to get trapped into thinking of the past, and forget that the goal is to get better. Thanks for posting this

[Isabeau]

JKM

I have doing a very similar thing with my Pdoc and on my own too,

Setting Goals does work!!!!

I will admit it was hard to start off and it still is, but knowing I am on some sort of path to my happiness makes me try even harder.

This is a great post JKM!!

HUGS

Isabeau

[conspicuous]

For most people setting goals is part of recovery, however small or large.

[Gisele]

I never noticed this topic before. I think it, and all of the replies, are fabulous!

I will never be cured-cured but that's probably pointless anyway.

I hope 'recovering' is something I am always doing and will feel like I'm getting somewhere:

When not everything about this illness is a weight and I can learn to embrace some things about it

When I can know what my tears are for

When today is something to be proud of

When tomorrow isn't the mood that gets pulled out of a hat

When a month is a gently winding track and not a super speedway with so many brick walls

When I can better ignore the forgettable

When I can better feel the wondrous

When I can sustain a desire for life

When I can feel all of these things

See that they a woven into me

And nurture my life, then another

Gisele

[duggie]

Since I have recovered from depression, my goal is to not be satisfied. That is why I still go to Therapy appointments. I changed my lifestyle. I take care of myself first and everyone else second.

Doug

[mjk5309]

recovery for me has been beating down my demond, i have kicked the bad habit of (self medicating). that was a few years ago. also i have recovered from my depression by using CBT i still get short bouts, but they are very short lived. anxiety is another thing. i still have alot of anxiety. i havent taken my klonopin more than twice in the past week however which means if im not reaching for that i am doing well.

megan

Edited January 25, 2009 by wren
edited trigger words per TOS