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How Do You Feel Today #26


Trace

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Sorry you have to deal with that Trace, but at least you'll be out of that situation soon! :) do you have another job lined up after this one?

Hi LilyRain

I don't really need to work, as my husband earns really good money and we have no debt, everything is paid off, including the house. My money is just extra every month.

I have worked and made my own money since I was 12 (I started baking and selling cakes (Christmas cakes mostly). I have never not worked and not made my own money. Resigning is a very difficult thing for me to do, working is all I know and I don't have a job lined up. I won't work for anyone else again. Before I worked in this job (been here for 7 years in an industry and job I hate, travel), I had my own restaurant and catering business. For health reasons I had to have one difficult client at work taken off me (I have Lupus and should not be put in any stressful situations) and they refused, despite the doctor saying so, so that made it easier for me to resign.

I am going to go back into the food industry in some way, but I am not allowed in stressful situations, so says the doc (restaurants/professional kitchens can be stressful, but that stress and pressure I have no problem with, I excel in those situations), So I am thinking of writing a cookbook, perhaps start a cooking blog, doing some restaurant reviews, maybe restaurant consultancy.

I am a pasta chef and used to make pasta and sauces and sell them to the restaurants, but if I do that, I need to hand pick only a certain few long standing restaurants with good reputations, I don't want to get too big. I'm going to chat to an old executive chef friend of mine that I worked with for nearly 4 years and run some idea's past him and see where it leads. Maybe I will make canape's on platters and sell them. I'm really good at those and then at least I don't have watch the people destroy my art work when they eat them. I used to have to do that when I actually had to do the entire function myself. Lol, it is literally liking making art and a lot of effort goes into it and in seconds it can all be destroyed, but at least they taste good and people liked them.

Of course I have DF, I have my kids, I can spend more time with them and take them places.

Ultimately I am going to take a few weeks to just heal and do nothing so that I can chill. I am in a bit of pain from the lupus (caused by the stress of this client) and I have all the nerves in my neck and shoulder trapped, so am on Xanax to release the tension and undo all the swelling and also to deal with the client. It will probably take a couple of months for that damage to come undone, then I can stop the Xanax.

Lol, anyway I carried on a bit there......

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Sorry you have to deal with that Trace, but at least you'll be out of that situation soon! :) do you have another job lined up after this one?

Hi LilyRain

I don't really need to work, as my husband earns really good money and we have no debt, everything is paid off, including the house. My money is just extra every month.

I have worked and made my own money since I was 12 (I started baking and selling cakes (Christmas cakes mostly). I have never not worked and not made my own money. Resigning is a very difficult thing for me to do, working is all I know and I don't have a job lined up. I won't work for anyone else again. Before I worked in this job (been here for 7 years in an industry and job I hate, travel), I had my own restaurant and catering business. For health reasons I had to have one difficult client at work taken off me (I have Lupus and should not be put in any stressful situations) and they refused, despite the doctor saying so, so that made it easier for me to resign.

I am going to go back into the food industry in some way, but I am not allowed in stressful situations, so says the doc (restaurants/professional kitchens can be stressful, but that stress and pressure I have no problem with, I excel in those situations), So I am thinking of writing a cookbook, perhaps start a cooking blog, doing some restaurant reviews, maybe restaurant consultancy.

I am a pasta chef and used to make pasta and sauces and sell them to the restaurants, but if I do that, I need to hand pick only a certain few long standing restaurants with good reputations, I don't want to get too big. I'm going to chat to an old executive chef friend of mine that I worked with for nearly 4 years and run some idea's past him and see where it leads. Maybe I will make canape's on platters and sell them. I'm really good at those and then at least I don't have watch the people destroy my art work when they eat them. I used to have to do that when I actually had to do the entire function myself. Lol, it is literally liking making art and a lot of effort goes into it and in seconds it can all be destroyed, but at least they taste good and people liked them.

Of course I have DF, I have my kids, I can spend more time with them and take them places.

Ultimately I am going to take a few weeks to just heal and do nothing so that I can chill. I am in a bit of pain from the lupus (caused by the stress of this client) and I have all the nerves in my neck and shoulder trapped, so am on Xanax to release the tension and undo all the swelling and also to deal with the client. It will probably take a couple of months for that damage to come undone, then I can stop the Xanax.

Lol, anyway I carried on a bit there......

You said you have a diagnosis from your doctor for lupus, notified your employer, and they still stuck you with a toxic client? Could you file a discrimination suit against the employer?

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Thank Violet31, I think it was a one day blip. I'm pretty good at keeping on top of my mental health these days, I do need to see my Dr again as I was meant to see him after restarting Olanzapine and it slipped my mind. I miss my parents as they are away three months and despite being adult sometimes I feel I could do with their support. Although even when they get back they won't be close by as they moved house before they went away.

Trace you ideas sound fantastic, I think this is a great time for you to be able to get your relaxation in and get the lupus under control again. You have such fantastic ideas for the future and I know that you'll achieve a lot.

I wish I was creative with food, I'd love to make cakes for a living, but pasta is great too!

Today I am happy my working week is over, I don't work Fridays (or Tuesdays).

Girly

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Ugh still feeling terrible.. I'm just feeling so down and worthless :(

I´m sorry Broken_girl, I hope you´ll feel better soon.

Ultimately I am going to take a few weeks to just heal and do nothing so that I can chill. I am in a bit of pain from the lupus (caused by the stress of this client) and I have all the nerves in my neck and shoulder trapped, so am on Xanax to release the tension and undo all the swelling and also to deal with the client. It will probably take a couple of months for that damage to come undone, then I can stop the Xanax.

Sending :hugs: your way.

I just came home from work, cracked my tooth and have an appointment with the dentist tomorrow. Started skipping rope to get more stamina, it´s tough but incredibly effective. Feel great today. :)

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Felt really sick and had a lot of paranoia while grocery shopping. I don't know if it triggered a panic attack or if I was just feeling really sick and overheated because I didn't have much to eat yet today. Finally had some health drink and goldfish once I bought the groceries, so I feel a bit better. I guess I need to eat breakfast. :verysad3:

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Thank you. I hope your tooth isn't too bad.. Tommorow I actually have my last workday at a dentist. Can't wait.. I definitely learned a lot but I so need a break!

Thanks. :)

This evening the wind is carrying the smell of salt from the sea nearby. It´s a beautiful evening and I´ve been sitting outside chatting with neighbors.

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I'm really exhausted today, and all I want to do is hug one of my best friends and cry, but none of them are nearby. So I'm dealing.

The worst part is that I'm in a house full of chatty people for the next day and a half or so. Blargh.

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I have a sore throat, my glands are up. This happens a lot. Grrr! I blame having spent quite a lot of yesterday afternoon trekking places in the rain and cold, getting damp and staying damp. Wouldn't know it is June here, it is like winter!

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Sorry you have to deal with that Trace, but at least you'll be out of that situation soon! :) do you have another job lined up after this one?

Hi LilyRain

I don't really need to work, as my husband earns really good money and we have no debt, everything is paid off, including the house. My money is just extra every month.

I have worked and made my own money since I was 12 (I started baking and selling cakes (Christmas cakes mostly). I have never not worked and not made my own money. Resigning is a very difficult thing for me to do, working is all I know and I don't have a job lined up. I won't work for anyone else again. Before I worked in this job (been here for 7 years in an industry and job I hate, travel), I had my own restaurant and catering business. For health reasons I had to have one difficult client at work taken off me (I have Lupus and should not be put in any stressful situations) and they refused, despite the doctor saying so, so that made it easier for me to resign.

I am going to go back into the food industry in some way, but I am not allowed in stressful situations, so says the doc (restaurants/professional kitchens can be stressful, but that stress and pressure I have no problem with, I excel in those situations), So I am thinking of writing a cookbook, perhaps start a cooking blog, doing some restaurant reviews, maybe restaurant consultancy.

I am a pasta chef and used to make pasta and sauces and sell them to the restaurants, but if I do that, I need to hand pick only a certain few long standing restaurants with good reputations, I don't want to get too big. I'm going to chat to an old executive chef friend of mine that I worked with for nearly 4 years and run some idea's past him and see where it leads. Maybe I will make canape's on platters and sell them. I'm really good at those and then at least I don't have watch the people destroy my art work when they eat them. I used to have to do that when I actually had to do the entire function myself. Lol, it is literally liking making art and a lot of effort goes into it and in seconds it can all be destroyed, but at least they taste good and people liked them.

Of course I have DF, I have my kids, I can spend more time with them and take them places.

Ultimately I am going to take a few weeks to just heal and do nothing so that I can chill. I am in a bit of pain from the lupus (caused by the stress of this client) and I have all the nerves in my neck and shoulder trapped, so am on Xanax to release the tension and undo all the swelling and also to deal with the client. It will probably take a couple of months for that damage to come undone, then I can stop the Xanax.

Lol, anyway I carried on a bit there......

You said you have a diagnosis from your doctor for lupus, notified your employer, and they still stuck you with a toxic client? Could you file a discrimination suit against the employer?

I'm not one for law suits. Its not worth the stress and I don't need the money. I could have filed 100's of law suits due to this illness by now. I walked around for 10 years undiagnosed seeing countless doctors, getting sicker and sicker, even ended up in hospital for a week and none of them, not even the hospital picked it up. What actually gets me is I have two forms of Lupus, (there are 3) I have Systemic lupus and I have discoid lupus, where I get marks on my face and skin, no one even bothered in all those years to take a biopsy. If anyone had bothered to do a biopsy it would have been picked up before I got seriously ill. I finally got diagnosed in 2008, by a brilliant doctor, when I was so ill I was actually on the brink of dying. It is a very misunderstood illness and it is only recently that the doctors have begun to recognize lupus and start to understand it a little more. Until last year I was treated with cortisone (among other meds), which long term has caused me to have other chronic illness's, which I have to be on meds for. They have now discovered that meds used to treat Chron's and help in organ transplant patients help with lupus, so am off cortisone and on those and am doing pretty well.

People are ignorant when it comes to the less understood illnesses, its just the way it is. My resignation is good enough for me.

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A bit frustrated. I had a conversation with my father that got very uncomfortable, even though we both were trying to avoid anything that seemed like a fight. Unfortunately, I think I failed my part in that quest. I feel bad. I feel we were both being sincere, with good intentions. And ever since, I have been drained, with intermittent short crying spells.

Odd thing is, I'm really in the mood for a movie, but in the end, I don't think I could enjoy it. So, I think I'm not going to go. But, I have no clue what I want to do, really. Maybe tonight I'll feel differently.

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I felt really, really low this morning. Yesterday I didn't take my anxiety meds - partly because I don't like that they make me sleepy, but also partly because I felt down then and I couldn't be bothered to walk upstairs to find them when I had ADs to hand at least. Took my meds, and slept a bit more, so woke up feeling a bit better, feel rather foolish for yesterday.

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