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Avalon

"i Don't Believe In Depression".

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People are probably going to grab there pitchforks and tar and feather me for this,but I don,t really belive in depression even though I am diagnosied as such and feel lot of emotional pain,I think most mental illness is a cultural construct.I think depressed people are just people who had bad upbrings and hung around sad people or are more emotionaly open then people.People who are more emotionally expressive are more likely to express there feelings,I worked with the genral public and I saw a lot of sad and angry people,none of them would ever admit to being depressed.I hear all kinds of comments that's indicate people are hopeless or unhappy with there life,most people are in denial about there unhappiness.My whole family seems more unhappy then me,I can tell by there tone of voice,the views they express about the world the obsession with bad things,the gossiping and anger with other people but they will never be diagnoised because they are in denial of there unhappiness.So I feel like depressed people are just self aware indivduals that want to be happy.I don,t see any evidence that depression is a chemical imbalance,I would think depression would be caused by brain trauma or one of the major organs not working,allergies and I believe that the rest of depression is purely psychological, I know mine is I was raised around negative and abusive people so I need to rid myself of there world views to be happy.

 

I think depression is a very broad word that barley explains an indivduals mind state, and I feel it describes a personality disorder more then a physical illness as some people treat it,like it can be cured by taking medicine.I think depression is a description of a tendcey for an individual to be more verbally express of emotions,have different postions on suicide then the majority of people.

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Because of those types of reactions is that i havent been able to adress this topyc with my family. Because its gonna be framed as a cry for attention or a stage. Although ive been suffering with this since my teenage years, hearing that its not real would deeply hurt. So i understand how you feel. We dont choose our fears and our emotions; but because they are subjective people believe that they could be changed easily and a better perspective on life can be adopted.

Thats not true, our problems are real and manifest mentally and phisically. Those who cannot see it, have been blessed with ignorance and brute strenght believing that they are immune to depression. who knows maybe they are, but we are all different and until they dont walk in your shoes they will never know what you feel

 

take care, Avalon. 

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Outside of these forums, my close friends and relatives, I don't believe in my depression either. I'd never mention it. It doesn't exist. Maybe if I keep thinking that way, eventually it will be that way.

 

Wishful thinking but at least it's positive. 

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I was talking to a coworker (call her P) today, and my MDD came up in conversation. As soon as I said the word "depression" P laughed and said, "You're not depressed, it's all in your head!"

 

[snip]

How do you guys deal with being told your MI isn't real? Especially if it's someone you consider yourself friends with, and/or you're in a setting where you can't really express your anger?

 

My recommendations, in order:

  1. If she is using that phrase to be dismissive, then politely disengage from the conversation and never bring it up with that person again because there's little hope of a real dialogue.
  2. If she's just stating her view and not trying to put you down with it, then you've got a teachable moment. Briefly and gently explain the medical evidence for depression as a disease, and then drop the subject.
  3. Play the guilt card: "That really hurt me, and I wish you wouldn't say things like that around me".

There are places where anger is inappropriate, but there is nowhere that you can't use [2] and [3] if you're firm and polite.

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Well, nobody in my family believed that depression is real. They kinda do now, after almost 2 years of having to endure me. But they still go with "it's all in your head, you just should think differently" thing. I got used to it, they still care about me, they just have a different world view that I can't influence. 

Friends, co-workers etc. should be left uninformed if possible. 

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On 5/24/2015 at 1:59 AM, scienceguy said:

People are probably going to grab there pitchforks and tar and feather me for this,but I don,t really belive in depression even though I am diagnosied as such and feel lot of emotional pain,I think most mental illness is a cultural construct.I think depressed people are just people who had bad upbrings and hung around sad people or are more emotionaly open then people.People who are more emotionally expressive are more likely to express there feelings,I worked with the genral public and I saw a lot of sad and angry people,none of them would ever admit to being depressed.I hear all kinds of comments that's indicate people are hopeless or unhappy with there life,most people are in denial about there unhappiness.My whole family seems more unhappy then me,I can tell by there tone of voice,the views they express about the world the obsession with bad things,the gossiping and anger with other people but they will never be diagnoised because they are in denial of there unhappiness.So I feel like depressed people are just self aware indivduals that want to be happy.I don,t see any evidence that depression is a chemical imbalance,I would think depression would be caused by brain trauma or one of the major organs not working,allergies and I believe that the rest of depression is purely psychological, I know mine is I was raised around negative and abusive people so I need to rid myself of there world views to be happy.

 

I think depression is a very broad word that barley explains an indivduals mind state, and I feel it describes a personality disorder more then a physical illness as some people treat it,like it can be cured by taking medicine.I think depression is a description of a tendcey for an individual to be more verbally express of emotions,have different postions on suicide then the majority of people.

As someone who has seen depression induced and rapidly taken away using chemistry and experiencing mood swings, I would say you don't really understand what depression is. 

I'm not one who was unhappy, in fact I had a spectacular life, lots of success and was what most people who consider a positive and strong person. None of that mattered when depression set in and I was unable to figure out why I was suddenly suicidal, unable to feel any positive emotion and why I was suddenly having concentration issues, brain fog and a general low health.

You might have situational or moderate depression from your life circumstances, but if you lived a day with unrelenting low-mood that was in no way affected by your surroundings or circumstances you might sing a different tune. Here's hoping you don't have to go there.

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18 hours ago, axl617 said:

As someone who has seen depression induced and rapidly taken away using chemistry and experiencing mood swings, I would say you don't really understand what depression is. 

I'm not one who was unhappy, in fact I had a spectacular life, lots of success and was what most people who consider a positive and strong person. None of that mattered when depression set in and I was unable to figure out why I was suddenly suicidal, unable to feel any positive emotion and why I was suddenly having concentration issues, brain fog and a general low health.

You might have situational or moderate depression from your life circumstances, but if you lived a day with unrelenting low-mood that was in no way affected by your surroundings or circumstances you might sing a different tune. Here's hoping you don't have to go there.

I have had crippling depression since I was 12 where I was suicidal everyday I am diagnoised bipolar and have borderline personality disorderI was diagnoised with severe depression. I have never been a happy person. I was placed in a outpatient program for 6 months but I still think,that depression is more likely to be diagnosed in emotionally open people. Most people won,t admit it, I see tons of depressed people everyday worrying about there futures who lack energy are angry. People who drink all the time drug addicts. I think most people are depressed it is alot more normal then we are led to believe. I still think the brain is damaged somehow I was in a car accident when I was a infant and had mengitis. Along with a abusive childhood I think the word depression isn,t very helpful because there are to many factors that could be causing and makes it sound like a terminal illness when it is almost impossible to distinguish between whether the depression is psychological or chemical, there are a whole list of personality traits that would make people more likely to be diagnosed with depression I feel it is a partially cultural thing to.

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This is such a breath of fresh air to read!! Thank you!

Trying to explain depression to someone who doesn't suffer from it is like trying to describe color to a blind person.

The real challenge is finding someone who does understand it whom you can talk to about it. .That's what's great about this forum.

A friend of mine said that his mentor once told him, "The moment I sense someone judging me for who I am, I get them out of my life."

And it's true. Life is too short to waste time and energy trying to convince the skeptics, so instead, try to surround yourself with people who accept you for who you are.

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I have always been a hard working, productive human being. I worked tremendously hard to raise my children with love and self worth. I have been a good wife to one man. Now I am dealing with the worst depression I can imagine. When I am alone I think how I absolutely care about nothing. If I don't make a house payment or if I even see my children. The level of how much I do not care scares me. I made it to a Dr this week and am now on medication. I am waiting for some relief because I can not imagine living my life like this. This is my 3rd and worst depressive episode. Its real, depression is real for me. Do I wish it wasn't? Oh yes. But here it is. Am I proud? No, shame came with it and a sense of failure as a human. I am beyond blessed there is something to help me. You best believe I am. This is only one ladies view, I speak only for me.     

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I'm pretty late in responding to this, so I'll keep it short if I can.  

I've learned not to share my problems with others because of the hurtful reactions I've often received outside of this forum, in real life.

Most of the time now, if somebody asks why I'm depressed, I refuse to talk about it.  I can tell that they asking because they want to judge...not to truly understand.  So I figure that if I keep it to myself (no matter how much it hurts) I can spare myself from further pain and misunderstanding from others.

One way you can look at it is this...if you know that you suffer from depression, you don't need others to believe it.   You don't need to convince anyone of what you are dealing with because YOU  know it.   There are often people who try to deny my reality or tell me that my feelings/experiences aren't real, but they are wrong.   It used to bother me but now I see that I don't need to convince them of anything or prove anything to them.  

I know for a fact that I have depression and that certain things have contributed to it.   I don't care if anyone believes that or not.   What I'm more concerned with is how to overcome it and heal and live a better life, even though I'm going through a tough time again.   

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