Hi

[mhc]

Hi

I have just joined today as i found the site looking up details of yet another medication, i have been depressed on and off for years. Went onto citalapram in may after a year off meds, got very bad night sweats so went on lofepramine 2 months ago. I have got worse and worse and have hardly stopped crying for days, can't sleep even with zoplicone and having some bad episodes where i feel i am losing it. I have a son with severe adhd and aspergers and 3 other children, last friday he pushed me into a road and hit me repeatedly infront of people and it feels like it was the start of the end for me. Husband took me to doctors today and he has stopped lofepramine and prescribed sertraline. He is worried that i have lost a lot of weight and look ill, my head hurts so much. I don't want to **** myself cos i couldn't make my children without a mother but i wish someone would bang me over the head so that i can just sleep until all this is better. I feel so gulity, I don't even want my dogs, they are stressing me out and want more than i have left. Probably none of this makes sense cos even i can't describe or explain. Sorry. Thankyou for reading this

[taysmom1016]

Hi

I have just joined today as i found the site looking up details of yet another medication, i have been depressed on and off for years. Went onto citalapram in may after a year off meds, got very bad night sweats so went on lofepramine 2 months ago. I have got worse and worse and have hardly stopped crying for days, can't sleep even with zoplicone and having some bad episodes where i feel i am losing it. I have a son with severe adhd and aspergers and 3 other children, last friday he pushed me into a road and hit me repeatedly infront of people and it feels like it was the start of the end for me. Husband took me to doctors today and he has stopped lofepramine and prescribed sertraline. He is worried that i have lost a lot of weight and look ill, my head hurts so much. I don't want to **** myself cos i couldn't make my children without a mother but i wish someone would bang me over the head so that i can just sleep until all this is better. I feel so gulity, I don't even want my dogs, they are stressing me out and want more than i have left. Probably none of this makes sense cos even i can't describe or explain. Sorry. Thankyou for reading this

Don't feel bad about not making sense because as far as I'm concerned, nothing about depression makes sense. And when you get that stressed out, even taking care of dogs can seem like a huge effort. I have one of my own and just got back from walking her. No matter how bad I feel or how cold it is (and it's about 30 here in MN today!) she needs to be walked. I also have an 11-year-old son. He is my reason for going on when I feel I can't. He is my strength. I'm a single mom and his father, well, let's just say living with him isn't an option.

I hope your new medication helps you. I too lost a lot of weight last year (40 lbs in 2 months) and my doctor put me on mirtazipine which helped with my appetite but doesn't seem to do much for my depression. I see her next week and I'm hoping she can add another med to help with that apect. I've done some research online about supplements and have been trying L-thearine and L-tryptophan for sleep which seems to help a little (please talk to your doc before trying anything else).

Anyway, welcome to the forum and know you are not alone. This is a great place to come to vent and read because there are so many people who are dealing with a lot of the same issues we are. Hang in there, you have a lot on your plate and sound like a wonderful, strong mother to be dealing with it and still being there for your kids.

[darcness]

(((mhc)))

Welcome to DF!

Trust me, everything you said makes perfect sense. We know EXACTLY what you mean, because we've all been there at one point or another. Please do check out our different rooms here and post any questions you might have. We're always here to listen and you don't have to go through this alone. You've got a LOT on your mind right now so it will probably help to talk to people who understand. Also the advice and support you get around here is second to none.