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neonnightsky

Yes, You Can Be Free From Depression! I Did It :)

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Hello,

I haven't been active in the forums in a LONG time, mostly because I haven't had the need for support. That's what brought me back; instead of seeking support, I want to offer it.

I would imagine that a good portion of the people who visit this forum are fairly well-adjusted; as well-adjusted as anyone on . Some people need a little help, some need a lot, others still are ACtively looking for alternatives. I applaud all of you who fall into any of those categories.

I have been depression-free for quite a while now. It'll be one year in May. I haven't relapsed, I haven't faltered (I have bad days here and there - stressful days where I want to cry or scream or both - but I always find a way to fix it) and that I had much, much more to offer the world (and the people in it, i.e. YOU). I knew that once I decided to take control of my mental health I WAS NOT GOING TO FAIL. And I haven't.

So, I want to offer some hope and inspiration to those of you who are not doing as well as you could be. Text has a strange way of misrepresenting one's tone of voice. Keep in mind that I'm writing this with a smile and hug for YOU, no matter where you are.

PM me for a link to a blog I kept. At least two of the posts dealt with my experiences on ADs and why I decided to get off of them **THIS IS NOT MEANT TO BE MEDICAL ADVICE. JUST BECAUSE I DID THIS ALONE DOES NOT GIVE YOU PERMISSION TO FOLLOW SUIT. PLEASE CONSULT WITH A MEDICAL PROFESSIONAL BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING INVOLVING YOUR MEDS/TREATMENT**Please send me a PM if you are interesting in a link to a blog i have kept, as well as posts dealing with my experiences on ADs.

Unfortunately, many people look for an outside influence for help. What, too, is unfortunate is that people don't realize that the source for help is YOU. YOU HAVE TO HELP YOURSELF. NOBODY CAN DO IT FOR YOU. You have to make the commitment to yourself that you ARE going to get better, you ARE better and you are getting better EVERY DAY! It's the truth. But you have to believe it.

If you don't believe that you can get better, you won't. Some of you probably were put off by that last paragraph. That's fine. If you're reading this one, you still believe that what I'm writing is right and you believe in yourself. That's good. :) Keep reading.

You must begin to change the way that you think. Often, people focus on the negative (I still have trouble with that). Think positively, especially when you're really down, because it is then that you can truly be grateful. Also, use your "depression" to your advantage. When you get depressed, get angry! Anger is a higher vibration than depression. Identify what you DO NOT WANT in your life and turn your back on it. Be bold! Be willing to give yourself a better life. You deserve it, don't you? OF COURSE YOU DO! It's YOUR life, live it YOUR way.

In order to think healthily, you must eat healthful food. Try to eat as much organic food as possible. I try my best with this one. I don't have a lot of money, but I know that I can go to Trader Joe's and get a decent amount of good food for around $25 dollars. So, eat better, even if you're on a budget like me. I recommend spinach or mixed greens salad, fruit, teas, etc. (your dietary requirements may be different from mine)

Also, exercise. This was a topic I used to shudder at when I was on meds. Thankfully, God (the Universe, what have you) gave me a job in retail which required me to walk nine hours a day. You don't have to be that aggressive, but make sure you at least walk at a decent pace in the sun at least once a week. Having the job I had really helped me to shed the pounds. Also, should you decide to get off meds, you'll notice that the weight will come off rather quickly.

Surround yourself with positive, like-minded people. Facebook is nice, but, c'mon, how often do you really visit with those people? Can you call them for support? Find those people and connect with them. But don't rely on them for a shoulder to cry on. Do fun things with them! Go for a walk together, go to a museum, something.

Act positively. You cannot completely will change into your life by thinking about it. It's only part of the equation. You have to take the necessary steps to rid your life of the negative things that are holding you down. Debt? Settle it. Hate your job? Find a new one. Success is just a decision away, folks. You just have to allow it into your life.

Invest some time into learning about cognitive behavioral therapy. Read "Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy" or "Mental Health Through Will Training" or both. It's really the only way I've found to rid yourself of negative thought patterns.

My suggestions, while effective, are only suggestions. But I will repeat myself: If you want to change, you have to make it happen. You have to BELIEVE that it WILL happen. Nobody is going to do it for you. You have to do it. YOU have to do it. YOU. HAVE. TO DO IT! So do it :)

If you read this far, you are truly stronger than your mind will allow you to believe at this moment. Congratulations! I commend you. If any of you have questions, please send me a PM. I will try to reply as soon as possible.

I am also part of a truly life-changing organization. If you would like more info about that, let me know. It will help you tremendously.

You ARE amazing. Thank you for reading; I hope this helped.

Edited by lucyvp
Per TOS Guidelines

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Hi neonnightsky

It is so great to see that you are doing well. That is fantastic and I just want to thank you for returning to post this, as it can help so many people and it is very inspirational.

You are correct that you have to help yourself, in order to recover. It ultimately comes from within and it is hard work, but it is the key to recovery and there are many things that can help along the way.

Trace

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Hello Neonightsky and welcome back to DF. I'm glad to see that you are doing well. Thanks for sharing your story and I'm sure others will find it inspirational.

Lindahurt

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Hello,

You cannot completely will change into your life by thinking about it. It's only part of the equation. You have to take the necessary steps to rid your life of the negative things that are holding you down. Debt? Settle it. Hate your job? Find a new one.

This part rang a bell for me because I used to think that I was trapped by former job and the emotional chaos that went with it and trapped by so much other negative thinking. I used to think this about everything. I thought there was never a way out because it was all I knew.

Thanks for sharing this, it was very encouraging and motivational.

Ocean

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If you want to change, you have to make it happen. You have to BELIEVE that it WILL happen. Nobody is going to do it for you. You have to do it. YOU have to do it. YOU. HAVE. TO DO IT! So do it :)

YES, you are so right, so right! In the past I have cured myself from depression, too. I could have written my own recommendation for how to get on the "right side" of life. IT IS IMPORTANT TO BELIEVE THAT CHANGE IS POSSIBLE.

The reason I'm a member here is that, something so evil and so terrible happened to me, that it would have made the most healthy person in the world sick! If not THAT had happened, none would have heard about me in DF.

My recovery was a bit different than yours:

1) I refused to call the depression an illness. Instead I called it a bad habit that I had to change.

2) Had a clear goal where all the lesser goals were steps on the road.

3) I had tolerance for that it takes time to change "habits" (the two steps forward and one step back ideology).

4) I mapped my triggers and arranged them in an order of what I wanted to work with first. I worked with one topic at a time and had told myself that I was busy working with the chosen topic. The others had to wait.

5) I saw myself as normal and was proud of what I was doing (changing the "learned wrong" habits).

6) I set apart one hour every evening to work with my "habits".

7) I used a schedule and a timer.

8) I forced myself to let go of experiences that bothered me during day time. These were only allowed to work with in the time sat apart for that.

9) Picked a work I wanted and enrolled myself for several years as a student.

9) Progressive muscle relaxation (PMR).

10) Physical exercise every morning.

11) A long walk (2-3 hours) every weekend.

12) Tried to keep my home tidy when I was not too exhausted to do that.

13) Family contact.

14) Built myself a little tiny ring of friends that didn't know about my depression.

Well, it was a long list to keep in mind, but it helped me! I DID GET RID OF THE DEPRESSION!!!

I'm so glad you came to tell us about your recovery, neonnightsky! I have put my experiences on to tell that there are more than one way to the goal. The most important ingredients are a plan, hope,get to know ones triggers, allow backslides and go on again as fast as possible, persistence in the often hard anti-depression-work over time, not to work with too big aims at the time + REMEMBER THAT NO ONE DOES THE JOB FOR YOU!

I havent read the book you recommended, but there is another one that I will recommend because it helps people both to cope with known triggers inside a known frame and it teaches how to cope with ambiguity. The book is a work step by step book and the best I have ever read: Yakpo M.D., "Breaking The Pattrens Of Depression".

........................................

Now that I have experienced EVIIIIL and fell apart (as everyone would have done), it's a bit more difficult to climb up again. I have already been a student. I already have a high degree. It's difficult to set the aim for recovery. I have found out that my belief in God is the best help. To live as a believer demands something of me. Inside that frame I'm going to rebuild myself and learn to cope with the depression. Nobody has guaranties in life. We all have to do the best out of our circumstances!

I wish I could have posted a picture of a climber here, but this will have to do the picturing in stead:

:Coopdessert: :sleep_1: :ohmy: :tear2::sadwalk: WORK! WORK! WORK! :laugh::Coopclapping:

My best wishes to everyone reading this thread!

Edited by Rosegirl

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Thank you for this post, it's wonderful. I found it to be very inspirational. I believe everything you said, you can't depend on others to make your life change, you have to do it for yourself. Which I plan to start doing.

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1) I refused to call the depression an illness. Instead I called it a bad habit that I had to change.

This. Is so useful. I have been thinking similar things myself.

Obviously depression does exist. It is a condition with well-documented and observable causes, symptoms and treatments. From an academic sense we *must* have a word to describe "depressive illness". But what I really think is that it should be called something different. The word depression is hugely negative and society's perception of it is not very accurate. When I'm feeling low I actually feel bad about being "depressed" - and this didn't happen before I knew I was "depressed". It makes me feel like there is something inherently wrong with me, and it doesn't remind me that although the symptoms of depression are a problem, they are one that can be overcome. I would prefer to call it something like "The habit of excessive self-critical, fearful, rumination brought about by learned behaviours and the structure of modern society".

Today I'm having a good day because I was feeling bad earlier, but now (after some time and mindfulness) I'm feeling better, and most importantly I am treating myself kindly for feeling bad, rather than feeling guilty about it. If you think of depression as a series of bad habits you need to overcome then getting well becomes manageable. But when overcoming any bad habit you have to realise that it won't happen overnight, and you'll have good days and bad days. The important thing is to be kind to yourself if you have a relapse. Imagine you're trying to give up smoking and you have a cigarette (or even a whole packet or ten). If you beat yourself up about failing you're likely to feel bad and smoke even more. If you treat yourself with kindness and realise that although you made a mistake, it is only human, and you can still carry on with your quitting, then you can feel better and get back on track.

Now in my life the bad days are becoming less and less. But one important thing I learnt today is that I have to accept a habit can't be broken overnight. If I string together a few good days then I suddenly feel like I'll never have a bad day again. Then as soon I do have a bad day I feel even worse and get stuck in a rut because I feel bad about feeling bad. The trick is to be kind to yourself about any moments like this, and realise that you are still moving in the right direction; that the number of good days is increasing and the number of bad days is decreasing.

I'm glad to hear you are doing good Rosegirl!

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I really appreciate this post and all subsequents replies and advice thereafter (particularly the book recommendations which I have noted and will read). I am a brand new member, registered just today. I have just come out of a two day depressive episode which has left me feeling exhausted. I already feel a little more positive having read this post. It is very encouraging to hear that depression can be beaten. I was diagnosed with clinical depression 8 years ago but can identify depressive episodes reaching back for over 20years (i am now 40). It took me a long time to ask for professional help and sometimes I am still in denial that I have depression despite being given a label. Thank you everyone and best wishes to everyone in their recovery.

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This is a great post. Inspirational. I admit to skipping past it when I read the title NOT because I didn't want to be free from depression but purely because of my pre conceptions of what it may contain. I was wrong. I was pleased to read the sucesses of people, releasing themselves from the ties that bind. And wish all others following the above advice every sucess in their endevour. Good Luck.

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Neonnightsky,

I absolutely loved your post! I am in the process of beginning the same path that you've taken. Eating better, exercising, removing negativity from my life, especially from my own mind. When I get my health insurance back, I would like to invest lots of quality time with a good therapist. I've suffered from depression since I was 15. I'm 24 now and things aren't the way I wished for them to be, but it's not too late, I know I'm on the right track. I am very glad to have stumbled upon this site and your topic on here, so now I don't feel so alone, and I feel even more confident, that I too, can soon find the solace I've been seeking all these years, and can say goodbye to all the rainy and stormy days! Thank you so much!

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I found something to pull me out of depression: starting my own business online! I had no idea that it was so easy.

You people should try it too.

PM me for the link.

Good luck to all of you and hope to see you there. It's a super nice community and I feel very welcome.

Edited by Violet31
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That's a very delightful, encouraging and inspirational read. As someone who's been struggling with depression on and off during the last ten years, I find it very comforting to know you can beat that devil and become free from it. I wish all the best to you.

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Can you cure asthma or diabetes by having the right attitude? I think not. Can you relieve the symptoms with the appropriate medication, yes! Depression is such a diverse illness which is complicated by "attitude" as the disease itself is in the brain, which is the "thought factory" and from where all human behaviour stems. Due to the nature of this condition, some are able to "cure" it themselves and others need medication. I belong to the latter camp. It took me many years to discover this about myself and I no longer fight it as much as a diabetic attempts not to fight their illness.

Having said that, this thread is still encouraging...

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You know, your positivity really does help. For those who had a negative attitude while reading this, try giving it some time, and coming back to read it in a more optimistic light. I have been imprisoning myself in a job that I am miserable in, and after reading this, something clicked. I realize I don't HAVE to stay at that job. I can find a new one and put in my two week. I know that ultimately my attitude is the problem and not my environment. But maybe this will be a step forward.

Thank you OP

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