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Celebrity Obsession - Help or Support


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Hi @starbucksjunkee & @nosleep I hope you are both doing ok.

I think you have both been so brave. What you did must have taken so much strength and courage. Unfollowing your COs, removing the CDs and minimising your time spent on your searching them. I take my hat off to you both, you’ve done something I just can't seem to do. Even as I type this reply, I have my COs band on the telly via YouTube. I really enjoy his band and really don't want to have to stop listening to the whole band, because of my silly emotions over one member. I wish I could love them as a normal fan, the way I do with my favs A7X. I really wish I had your courage, I really do. Well done to both you for making such a huge step. 

 

@starbucksjunkee Those songs you suggested are great I enjoy these songs also, they help you keep focusing on your CO journey goal. A song I found that helps me is called The Mountain by Three Days Grace. The chorus is the bit the means the most to me on my CO journey “Everyday I’m just surviving, keep climbing the mountain. Every-time I think I’m  over it I wake you at the bottom of it all again.“ This rings so true for me with my New CO. I feel like I’m making progress then, bam, I’m right back to the start.

 

@nikki114 sorry your struggling, vent here as much or as little as you need. We are all here for you.

 

Hope everyone else is doing ok 

 

 

 

 

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@decado - I gotta say, I'm not feeling very strong when I'm staggering around like a zombie all day because I've been up all night watching 10 year old videos and creeping on his twitter like a damn stalker. But thank you. I was in a good space for a while, with my new therapy and my new workout regime, I'd gone on vacation with my husband and was feeling almost normal. I thought I could stay normal, but I guess not. All it took was once glimpse at his adorable, fuzzy, dorky face and I was 100% all in again. And then today, he released his first new video in months. It just about broke me. I watched it at least 10 times. I'm so ashamed of myself, but I know I'll watch it 10 more times before I go to bed tonight. I wish there was a pill that could fix me.

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13 hours ago, nosleep said:

@decado - I gotta say, I'm not feeling very strong when I'm staggering around like a zombie all day because I've been up all night watching 10 year old videos and creeping on his twitter like a damn stalker. But thank you. I was in a good space for a while, with my new therapy and my new workout regime, I'd gone on vacation with my husband and was feeling almost normal. I thought I could stay normal, but I guess not. All it took was once glimpse at his adorable, fuzzy, dorky face and I was 100% all in again. And then today, he released his first new video in months. It just about broke me. I watched it at least 10 times. I'm so ashamed of myself, but I know I'll watch it 10 more times before I go to bed tonight. I wish there was a pill that could fix me.

I’m so sorry your struggling, I completely understand where your coming from. Try not to beat yourself up too much or put too much pressure on yourself. Take one step at a time and do what is right for you. Perhaps try and reduce the amount of times you watch the video, even by maybe one or two. I’m just like you and want to stay up stupidly late and watch the videos over again. Something I’ve been trying is to set a time, say 11pm, whether It’s finished or not to turn it off and go to sleep. Believe me it was so hard to do the first few times. But I’ve not been as tried and I’m able to focus more at work. In my experience sometimes when you force yourself to go cold turkey it can make so much harder  to get rid of the feelings then you crave to fed the addiction. Whereas reducing ever so slightly everyday may make it a little easier to deal with. Of course everyone is different, what works for others, might not work for all. It’s worth a try.

Another thing Ive tried, is to listen to his band less and fill my need for music (I listen to music all the time) with much more of my other favourite bands and tried listening to new bands. This hasn’t been easy either, because their new song kind of explains my exact feeings about this CO right now, But I’m trying. 

I wish you Good luck with it, I’m here if you ever want to talk xx 

Edited by decado
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Well I’ve just done something incredibly stupid, I just came across a new interview with my CO thats really upset me. I really wished I hadn’t pressed play. By the title of the interview I should have known that it wasn’t going to be something I wanted to hear, I’m so stupid 😬

Sorry everyone I just needed to vent, I feel so silly right now. 

Edited by decado
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4 hours ago, decado said:

Well I’ve just done something incredibly stupid, I just came across a new interview with my CO thats really upset me. I really wished I hadn’t pressed play. By the title of the interview I should have known that it wasn’t going to be something I wanted to hear, I’m so stupid 😬

Sorry everyone I just needed to vent, I feel so silly right now. 

Just like you told me, don't beat yourself up about it!  It's so easy to give into temptation. That's the thing with celebrities - their personal lives are out there, and it can be really hard to keep them in a little box where they only do and say things that make you happy. When they start talking about things in their real lives that don't fit into what you want from them, it can be painful, almost like they're doing it to hurt you intentionally.  It's not logical to feel that way, but since when are emotions logical, right? Maybe this will be a good thing, and it will help you to move on from them? 

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9 hours ago, decado said:

Well I’ve just done something incredibly stupid, I just came across a new interview with my CO thats really upset me. I really wished I hadn’t pressed play. By the title of the interview I should have known that it wasn’t going to be something I wanted to hear, I’m so stupid 😬

Sorry everyone I just needed to vent, I feel so silly right now. 

I don't think you're stupid. I would have looked at the interview too, if I were in your place. It's too much to resist the temptation, especially if the title was something I really wanted to know about. I'm sorry to hear it was upsetting. Vent some more here if you like. We'll understand.

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@nosleep & @BlueStar I hope you are both ok? 

Thank you so much for your kind words. I just felt so stupid yesterday. I’m sorry for coming and venting on the forum, I just didn’t know where else to turn. 
I knew from the title that nothing good was going to come out of watching it. On reflection though, it wasn’t like he said anything that I didn’t already know, he’s fully admitted that he is a womaniser many times in other interviews and never hides the fact. It’s just this interview was a lot more detailed, than I guess I was expecting. My lifelong CO used to be the exact same way and I’ve heard him also say similar things in interviews.  I guess I forgot how that stuff can hurt hearing it. 

On the plus side, the interview did help me find out the reason I fell so hard and fast for this CO, he is literally a younger version of my lifelong CO in so many ways. Both my COs have a vulnerability about them, underneath all the confidence, which makes me love them all the more. 

 Even after the interview, I thought I’d be able to go and delete all his photos but nope, the first photo I saw was my favourite, the devil got me again and I ended keeping them and felling back in love with him all over again.

Thank you again for your understanding and support xx 
 

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