Jump to content

How To Get Motivated To Take A Shower.


PeacePilgrim

Recommended Posts

BUT - i sure can understand what you mean about the ambition it takes just to do something like that. sometimes it's just hard to brush my teeth (if i'm not going somewhere i mean), or i will sometimes forget some of what would be my normal routines. unless i'm going somewhere or feel energized (which isn't all that often), i wonder what the point is. i just feel so TIRED of life, honestly. i have a feeling there's others who can relate to that...

Gosh, I can't believe I've stumbled across this thread! THANK YOU!!!

And, no, you are not alone. I feel that way, too. I actually have a blood clot that was somewhat serious, and do you know that part of me was relieved to think that it all might be over? I'm not suicidal, and I am taking my daily shots of blood thinners like a good girl, but let's just say that it wouldn't have been disappointing to have the whole problem of life taken out of my hands if you know what I mean.

The lack of interest in showering is definitely a symptom of a larger problem. I've told my psychiatrist I'm having this problem with showering, and with leaving the house at all. I just don't want to, and avoid going out at all possible costs. And, more confusing -- THIS ISN'T ME! I'm vain and take pride in my appearance! I hit the hairdresser, watch my diet, take a walk every day to control weight. Lately, I don't shower for a week at a time, haven't had my hair done in months, and simply cannot stand the way my body looks and all the weight I've gained. I can't even leave to go for that walk. I'm just gross.

My psychiatrist says it's anxious depression, and that he's trying to treat the anxiety. I was unaware of any anxiety until he said that, and suddenly it made sense.

I'm going to try to work up the energy to shower my gross, fat, ugly, nasty self today.

Hi, LazyMommy...just wanted to tell you I feel your pain! Sounds just like me, except I don't see a doctor anymore.

I hear you, girl. I used to care a LOT about my weight/appearance. I still do but I guess the depression has taken me over completely because I'm at the highest weight I've ever been in my life and I can't stand to see my body at all.

I need to start walking again and getting back into shape, but I just can't seem to do it. I also gained weight as a form of self-protection because I took a lot of abuse from people when I was skinny. Men would harass me constantly and most women were hostile, but I find that people are mostly indifferent to me now that I'm fat.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Okay, back to the struggle, It turns out that it is exactly two weeks since my last shower, so would be neat if I could get one tonight. (The past couple times it's turned into a 2-week turnaround rather than a month-long turnaround. Last shower was early Thursday morning July 26-2012 around 4:00am.)

Okay, so I did NOT succeed in getting a shower on Thursday August 9th. I kept dropping things and getting upset Thursday night and decided it was not the best idea to physically "risk" getting into the shower stall in that state. Better just to let it go for the night.

But this morning early I DID succeed, Saturday August 11th at 6am. So 2 weeks and 2 days since last shower.

This AM, I saw a "window" where I thought I would be able to shower, after having laid down to sleep and getting a short rest instead of sleep. Having showered relieves pressure on me later today to get a haircut, because my hair has gotten somewhat long and I was hoping that getting it cut would increase my shower motivation. instead, it worked the other way, and part of the motivation to shower was to release the pressure to get a haircut. Now I can let up on myself and not feel I HAVE to go for the haircut today.

This wasn't a bad shower. I had a new bar of soap prepped to go, which was nice. And I was able to "rush" through some parts because I guess I didn't feel so tired.

The neatest thing about the whole shower was when I realized that daylight was breaking through the trees just toward the end of my shower! I always relax more when I see the light dissipate the darkness.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...

I've gone easily a couple weeks without showering many, many times. Even worse with washing my hair.

It's been at least three months since I've washed my hair. (longest ever) I think it was early June.

Now showering, I do more (at least every 2 or 3 days) because I live with my b/f. But when I lived alone, like I said, maybe once a week. Even when I was working.

For me - it's no energy and just not caring. :(

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 weeks later...

I haven't even wanted to look to see when my last shower was, because I knew it had been a ***long long*** time. Looking it up today, I see I was right: last shower was Saturday August 11th at 6am. So a long seven weeks exactly between showers. Interesting that this shower was also on a Saturday, and also in the morning. Today's shower was approx. 9:30am to 10:00am on Saturday, September 29, 2012. I had the bathroom window open to fair mild temperatures although overcast skies. Decent shower, even though I got a bit tired as per usual. The bamboo stool is a god-send in terms of helping me make it all the way through. When tired, I just sit and keep scrubbing! Did a slightly more thorough job with loufa-type sponges because of length of time between showers. Feel decent enough just now after the shower.

I clearly know the reason for the long delay between showers, because prior to this I had been doing better with a shower approximately every two weeks.

Shortly after my August 11th shower, I took my 13-year-old cat to the vet for her annual wellness checkup. I was overwhelmed to learn that she has two serious illnesses: hyperthyroidism with very high numbers, and glaucoma, which is much more serious than I ever realized. All my time and energy and waking hours have gone into problem-solving for her, including two trips to specialist vets at some distance from me, and hiring a vet tech to come in once a day to do the eye drops that I'm not capable of doing myself. So self-care, including massage and showers, have just gone out the window. This is my week for turning this around, with a shower today and massage scheduled for next Tuesday.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

PeacePilgrim, I was just thinking about how I need to get a shower this morning but I just feel so bleh... Then I saw this thread lol.

Looks like its pretty common among depressed people. It's hard to get going in the morning sometimes...

When I was going through opiate withdrawals, it took all the physical and mental energy I had to just get out of bed and go turn on a hot shower and just sit there, in misery. But it helped so much more than I thought it would at first. I try to remind myself, I'll feel so much better , wake up and have more energy once I get a shower.

Yeah I'm gonna go get one now actually. :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 4 weeks later...

I don't know how I did it, but I managed to squeak a shower in around 11:30pm tonight, Thursday October 25, 2012. I have been feeling lousy and struggling to get one for days and days: even tonight was hard once I was in the shower stall. Felt so tired, I had to push to keep going. Focused on scrubbing more than soaping, since once the soap was on, I became obsessive re getting it off again. Last shower was 9:30am on Saturday, September 29, 2012--so managed to come in just 2 days short of a month. Which was about what I expected. I feel absolutely overwhelmed by life right now, can't keep up. Collapsed last Monday night in tears that wouldn't stop for 40 minutes. Turned down by another psych. clinic today---not handicap accessible. Computer has had a serious virus threat for two days and it has taken away one of my few consistent resources. That I got a shower at all tonight is some kind of miracle!

PS Thanks for the comments above! And yes I do have a stool in my shower--a lovely triangular bamboo one! I absolutely love it and don't know what I would do without it!

Edited by PeacePilgrim
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 5 weeks later...

Saturday, November 24, 2012:

I got a shower tonight between 10 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Earlier I had checked and was surprised to discover that it had "only" been a month since my last shower on Thursday October 25th at 11:30pm. It had seemed much longer, I think partially because a week of power outage and consequent evacuation had happened in the interim.

I struggled physically with the shower tonight, not so much with pain as with general stiffness and awkwardness of movement. This really disappointed me, because I had wanted it to go well, once I got past the emotional/mental blocks and got into the shower stall. I kept wanting to give up, but hated the thought of having to try it again anytime soon. The shower had been a primary goal of mine today, because it was a rare day without an assistant and therefore I had a larger block of time to choose from.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

Well, I started the New Year with a shower, around 9am this morning January 01-2013, when I couldn't sleep. It's been a LONG time since last shower on Sat, Nov 24, 2012, between 10 p.m. and 10:30 p.m. Five weeks and 3 days between the two. It's been a really rough time the worst time of the year anyway, and I kept losing my assistants who support me both physically and emotionally. One quit on Christmas Eve, and one last night on New Year's Eve. Physically, I am not doing well either--pain from arthritis increases difficulty in sleeping..

Anyway, somehow I managed today. It was nice to have it daylight outside, I found that very comforting. I have to be very careful moving around the shower stall, but my bamboo seat and quad cane with 'raincoat' certainly help. At least I feel clean for now. I am not sure what it means for the future....the mental blocks to a shower are hard enough, but the physical ones are getting worse--and unfortunately, it all seems so pointless in the long run.

PS I just remembered that my motivation was given a bit of a boost today by the fact that I am supposed to meet with a high-level attorney about redoing my will on Thursday, and I want to be spanking fresh and clean for that meeting.

Edited by PeacePilgrim
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I only shower about every two-three days when I am at home not doing anything and don't have to go out. I never really sweat or get dirty and no ones going to see me, so what's the use in doing it every day.. But when I have to go out or I have to work, I shower. So on average, I take about 3-4 showers a week. Washing my hair is the worst, because then I have to fix it...that's a real pain. So I usually I only wash my hair once or twice a week. Most of the time at home you will find me in sweat pants and sweat shirt or tee shirt and slippers.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Im down to one shower a month myself if that. I used to love showers and spend 45m and get in trouble for it all the time. Sometimes Id take two showers per day. Now I never take them. I don't know I just don't care, even when i feel dirty and hate it wont shower. I hate being dirty too, well at least I used to. It doesnt help that my water heater is busted and only provides 5min of hot water max, and you have to like keep it warm, then slowly increase it after a minute or else all the hot water will be gone asap if you just put it on full.

Same for brushing teeth. I just don't care.

but to save time and to help remember to clean them in college i used to brush my teeth in the shower still do. it realy is a time saver...

You don't save time, since the time you spent brushing isnt changed only the location where you brush unless you think the time saved by the rate of water flow to rinse is greater then the frustration of having to keep a toothbrush in your mouth for your whole shower is worth it. Drying your hair with a toothbrush in your mouth is very annoying as well

Edited by TheNamelessOne
Link to comment
Share on other sites

SO glad I'm not alone on this!

The whole "The shower looked like Everest" thing I relate to soooo much! XD

The odd thing is, whenever I finally get in the shower or bath, I feel like crying with this weird kind of relief.... It likely has something to do with the fact that my skin and my muscles have forgotten the sensation of hot liquid caressing all over it (lol sorry) and it just feels so amazing.. I always, always think "Ahhh this is so good I am going to do this every day from now on!", but it never happens.. I'm still lucky to get one a week tops. Sometimes it's more like once a month.

Just thinking about it feels exhausting.. Uhh.. it means I've got to get my towel, put the water on, check the water, and then I get all wet... wash my hair, shave.. blahh.. -_-

It's strange because I spend a lot of money on a lot of wacky or fancy bath products, which I occasionally do deliberately to actually encourage me to use the darn thing as a sort of incentive. Like "Oooh look, me! You spent all this money on lovely bath products! I bet you can't wait to get in there now.... right?!" But still I'm like "uhhh -_- no"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For me it's not just about showering (or bathing in general)... It spills over into other areas of life. Everything is just such a huge effort. I don't want to be unclean and I don't want to be so lazy that my partner comes to hate my lethargy. We share the chores but I'm just so lazy I don't put my share of the washing away.... I can walk past it for days & it's just invisible to me. If I didn't live with someone who does get on with stuff like this, I don't know whether I'd function or not.

Even at work the same thing happens sometimes. I know there are things I should be getting done but I find its almost too hard to lift a finger.

I'm not always like this & know I'm depressed at the moment. but I do wish everything wasn't such an effort sometimes as I wonder where it leads me in life.

The idea of enjoying showering instead of thinking of it as a chore does sound nice. I'll try & remind myself of that next time I'm struggling with this

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 4 weeks later...

I just found this thread. I found it to be very interesting. I suffer with depression and have come up against this issue more than once. However, I live in a warm-hot climate and am going through menopause with hot flashes and night sweats so no matter how "unmotivated" I may feel, not showering and not brushing my teeth is simply NOT an option for me. I take a shower in the morning, brush my teeth and get dressed whether I go out or not. I also take one before bedtime to cut down on the night sweats. I must admit that the longest I have gone without showering was about a week--and I felt like crap. Not showering makes depression WORSE! I simply don't look at cleanliness as being optional. I have nice smelling body washes and lotions to put on afterward. This makes doing something that is a necessity much more enjoyable. The more one stops looking at cleanliness as optional and gets into the habit of regular showers the easier and more enjoyable showering becomes! Also, after a morning shower I am more likely to get out--even if only for a walk or to the store and get other things done. I also never let my housework or laundry pile up. I am OCD about a clean house and when things pile up they become insurmountable tasks! Antidepressants have never worked for me so I had to come up with other ways to fight depression--exercise, healthy diet, cleanliness (myself, my apartment and my clothes). When I feel unmotivated I just become more determined to fight. I am 57 years old and I am about to start Dialectic Behavioral Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder. Hopefully that will also help my depression because I want to return to volunteer work and go back to college next year. God bless you all. Btw, I attend church every Sunday. Praising The Lord is a good motivator to clean yourself up! Good luck to all of you.

Edited by finallyfree2013
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm not the only one? Phewww! It's summer right now. These meds make me sweat even more than usual and I KNOW that taking a shower will make me feel slightly better, but it feels like such an effort.
Once I'm in there it's great and I don't want to get out and think "why was I avoiding this?" , only to continue the same cycle.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, it seems you have half the battle won! You enjoy showers, it's just a matter of getting in there. Sometimes I think that when people have depression it's not just about a shower but about life in general. Taking a shower means getting ready to face the day and facing the day can be scary. I suffer with bi-polar depression, panic attacks, agoraphobia and borderline personality disorder--this makes life difficult at times. I did have some med changes that have made me feel much better. You may want to talk with a doctor if you feel you might have depression. If not, there are some things you can do to make showering pleasurable again: keep you bathroom clean--showering in a dirty bathroom is not pleasant. Try scented candles, music, nice smelling body washes and lotions. These all work for me. And remember, if you want to have any kind of a life then bathing is not optional! Don't over think it--just turn the water on and hop in! I now look forward to showering every morning and every night! You can too! Good luck and God bless!

Edited by finallyfree2013
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm the opposite, a shower is something I actually look forward to and I see it as a luxury. When I don't shower I develop this stale sweaty hair smell that annoys me so I feel I have to shower everyday, and I feel really fresh and relaxed afterwards.

I live in a fairly cold & miserable climate so a nice hot shower to me is an escape to a steamy tropical environment.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

No matter how depressed I am, a daily shower is not even negotiable.

Exactly! I suffer from depression. The time I did't shower for a week, I felt like warmed-over crap! I never let that happen again! I use nice-smelling body washes, lotion, a clean and comfortable bathroom with scented candle and turn my bathroom into a spa! I enjoy my morning and nighttime showers each and every day! When I was growing up we were poor. The apt. where we lived didn't always have hot water. My mother would heat water on the stove so I could bathe before school, it was not comfortable. But my mom insisted I have a bath before school and before bed. She always told me that "bathing is NOT optional!" Not being clean just makes depression WORSE! The longer a person goes without bathing or showering the worse they will feel! There's one poster on here that suffers with hives and rashes. Well, it's not surprising. Not showering for weeks--even for up to a month? Of course she's going to itch and break out! People, depressed or not, if fact, ESPECIALLY if you suffer from depression--cleanliness is MANDATORY! Showering/bathing is NOT optional--not if you want any kind of a life! I repeat showering/bathing is NOT optional!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am back, trying to work up the energy and nerve to get another shower. It is scary, because my body has been more weak and in pain than usual. But I am trying to find the right moment when I can handle it. I already have my quad cane dressed in its "rain jacket" to go into the shower. Oddly enough, I was thinking of doing it the other night when the super high winds picked up and came slamming constantly against the house. I realized that it might be a good idea not to shower this night, in case of power outage--and within an hour's time, such was the case. I was very glad I wasn't standing on a slippery floor covered with soap when the power suddenly died. Some places locally didn't get their power back for 24 hours or more.

In any case, I am committing here to try it within the next couple of days. This has worked before, and I plan to see if it will work again.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...