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Feeling Guilty


jon_doe

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I've done something that I'm not too proud of and attempted suicide because of this. About a week after my attempt, I called a crisis hotline to tell someone what was bothering me and that I was planning to attempt it again. The operator made me promise her to stay on the phone untill help came and I did. I stayed in the Psych Ward for a week and a half and they helped a lot. I told them everything that was bothering me and they diagnosed me with depression. They prescribed me Lexapro and Respridol for paranoia. After all this, I still feel like I deserve to die and I'm beginning to not feel so safe anymore. Can anyone give me advice on how to deal with this or anything? I'm in desperate need of help. Thanks.

Edited by jon_doe
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Hi John Doe, welcome to DF =) I'm glad you were able to call a crisis line for help and decided to go to the hospital. That was a great decision and good thinking on your part. How long ago did they prescribe the medication to you? It can take up to a month or so for it to get into your system and reach it's full potential of helping. But, also, if these feelings have increased then you should talk to your doctor or go back to the hospital... sometimes there are side effects that can cause those symptoms. I know going back to the hospital may be the last thing you would want to do, but it may be necessary to keep yourself safe. If you are feeling in immediate threat, then I would definitely go to the hospital or call a crisis line again. That is the most important thing, to keep yourself safe until you can recover from depression. Depression can greatly distort our thinking and cause us to believe we don't deserve to live or should die... but that is not true at all. Keep being proactive in your recovery. You will not feel the way you do forever.

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jon, If you no longer feel safe, go to the ER or call the crisis line again.

How long ago did you start Lexapro and Risperdol? It can take up to 8 weeks before meds become fully effective.

I see you're online. Please, call the crisis line or go to the ER.

Sheepwoman

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jon, If you no longer feel safe, go to the ER or call the crisis line again.

How long ago did you start Lexapro and Risperdol? It can take up to 8 weeks before meds become fully effective.

I see you're online. Please, call the crisis line or go to the ER.

Sheepwoman

i started my meds about ten days ago. the hospital gave me all the help they could and i feel that they can help me no more. it seems like the only solution is to end myself. if u knew what i did i bet u would think i deserve to die too. it saddens me that i feel this way, but it's the truth. I live in fear of not knowing whats going to happen to me and i just want to end it.

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jon, If you no longer feel safe, go to the ER or call the crisis line again.

How long ago did you start Lexapro and Risperdol? It can take up to 8 weeks before meds become fully effective.

I see you're online. Please, call the crisis line or go to the ER.

Sheepwoman

i started my meds about ten days ago. the hospital gave me all the help they could and i feel that they can help me no more. it seems like the only solution is to end myself. if u knew what i did i bet u would think i deserve to die too. it saddens me that i feel this way, but it's the truth. I live in fear of not knowing whats going to happen to me and i just want to end it.

Suicide is never the only solution. Don't do it. Those problems you are having right now will pass.

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I've done something that I'm not too proud of and attempted suicide because of this. About a week after my attempt, I called a crisis hotline to tell someone what was bothering me and that I was planning to attempt it again. The operator made me promise her to stay on the phone untill help came and I did. I stayed in the Psych Ward for a week and a half and they helped a lot. I told them everything that was bothering me and they diagnosed me with depression. They prescribed me Lexapro and Respridol for paranoia. After all this, I still feel like I deserve to die and I'm beginning to not feel so safe anymore. Can anyone give me advice on how to deal with this or anything? I'm in desperate need of help. Thanks.

What did you do that you're not proud of and think you should die for doing?

If you can't or don't want say that's alright.

Edited by Fitch
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Hi Jon,

It takes alot to call for help and you've just started that process. Good.

I'm not sure what a "normal life" looks like. There may be such a thing, or it may be that every life is individual and unique and we all think there is a normal out there. Don't worry too much about that.

Everyone does thing that they are not proud of. Some things are bigger than others. You recognize it and are going thru remorse. That's not all bad. It will feel bad.

If the Hospital helped, they can help again. Also, remember today is not tommorow. Just because you feel horrible today, it doesn't mean that there isn't a tommorow where you will feel better. Don't judge your entire future on just one event of your past. There is a positive place you can take your life if you chose.

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Hi Jon,

It takes alot to call for help and you've just started that process. Good.

I'm not sure what a "normal life" looks like. There may be such a thing, or it may be that every life is individual and unique and we all think there is a normal out there. Don't worry too much about that.

Everyone does thing that they are not proud of. Some things are bigger than others. You recognize it and are going thru remorse. That's not all bad. It will feel bad.

If the Hospital helped, they can help again. Also, remember today is not tommorow. Just because you feel horrible today, it doesn't mean that there isn't a tommorow where you will feel better. Don't judge your entire future on just one event of your past. There is a positive place you can take your life if you chose.

Everyones advice has been quite helpful. Right now i'm just debating on wether or not to go to the hospital. I really don't want to but it seems like i must, because i really don't feel safe right now. And you're right mmoose. everyone's done something that they're not proud of, and i'm pretty sure my problem is by far the worse that ever happened. thanks a lot. (^_^)...V

Edited by jon_doe
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Hi Jon,

Well, I haven't see any mass m***** stories in the news lately. Not sure if what you did could be worse than that.

Not trying to make light of it, well, ok, not much. But when it is something we have done, it does get magnified in our minds. And we can obsess about it. It's hard to put it in the proper perspective sometimes. So don't trust certain feelings (like "I don't deserve..." or "I want to hurt").

So ask yourself if your problem is really the worst thing to happen in the history of civilization.

But if you don't feel safe right now, yes, get some help somehow somewhere.

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Hi Jon,

Well, I haven't see any mass m***** stories in the news lately. Not sure if what you did could be worse than that.

Not trying to make light of it, well, ok, not much. But when it is something we have done, it does get magnified in our minds. And we can obsess about it. It's hard to put it in the proper perspective sometimes. So don't trust certain feelings (like "I don't deserve..." or "I want to hurt").

So ask yourself if your problem is really the worst thing to happen in the history of civilization.

But if you don't feel safe right now, yes, get some help somehow somewhere.

aw man. i'm sorry. what i meant to say was my problem is by far the least worse than of what other's done. lol. you give out some pretty good advice though.

Edited by jon_doe
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Hi Jon,

I thought that maybe you meant to say that. But still, it can help with perspective, right?

In one way, your problem isn't the biggest in the world. In another, it IS the biggest problem in YOUR world. Finding the balance between the two and dealing with the situation is a skill it takes some of us a lifetime to learn.

I don't feel entitled to the air I breath. But I keep breathing. Ignore some things, pay close attention to others. Hang in there and let us know how you are day to day!

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((((((Jon))))))) :flowers: I completely agree with Moose and especially here "Everyone does thing that they are not proud of. Some things are bigger than others. You recognize it and are going thru remorse. That's not all bad. " I'm so glad you found us and welcome to DF!! Please take care of you and let us know what you do!!! XOXOXO Love Pearly :hearts:

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((((((Jon))))))) :flowers: I completely agree with Moose and especially here "Everyone does thing that they are not proud of. Some things are bigger than others. You recognize it and are going thru remorse. That's not all bad. " I'm so glad you found us and welcome to DF!! Please take care of you and let us know what you do!!! XOXOXO Love Pearly :hearts:

just to let everyone know, i'm doing a lot better than this morning. i called a crisis hotline and chatted with them for a while, plus i called my last psychiatrist and told him how i was feeling. he said i should go to the hospital and try to get my meds changed. i think i'm doing okay for now but if the feelings get worse i will go. thanks for all the advice, i greatly appreciate it.

Edited by jon_doe
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((((((Jon))))))) :hearts: I completely agree with Moose and especially here "Everyone does thing that they are not proud of. Some things are bigger than others. You recognize it and are going thru remorse. That's not all bad. " I'm so glad you found us and welcome to DF!! Please take care of you and let us know what you do!!! XOXOXO Love Pearly :hearts:

just to let everyone know, i'm doing a lot better than this morning. i called a crisis hotline and chatted with them for a while, plus i called my last psychiatrist and told him how i was feeling. he said i should go to the hospital and try to get my meds changed. i think i'm doing okay for now but if the feelings get worse i will go. thanks for all the advice, i greatly appreciate it.

This is Wonderful news baby!!! :flowers::hearts: Thank you for letting us know and please do keep us posted!!!! :hearts: XOXOXO Love Pearly

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