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What about setting up an anonymous weblog (blog) to get your feelings out. Everyone's experiences give insight and can be a benefit to others.

I think that could be an EXCELLENT idea!!!!

Good for you chris for thinking of something like that. I should probably start journaling too as it's the one thing I'm not doing and I want to do EVERYTHING possible to aid my recovery!!!!

(Although I sure do post here a heck of a lot. Maybe that counts for some?)

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  • 4 weeks later...

I stopped journaling for several years because I felt as though I couldn't trust that my words wouldn't be read. Then someone close to me committed suicide and I could not *not* journal - the words had to get outside my head or else they would drive me crazy. So I trotted myself down to the local megamart and bought myself a fireproof lock box. Perfect size for your average journal and the box was just big enough to hold several journals. Kept the key with me all the time. After a while I got to a point where I felt like - if someone wants to read what I've written, that's their sh*t and they deserve any pain it causes them. No longer my worry. I have tried the blog, but there's just something about the feel of the pen in my hand that can't be replaced by a keyboard. Hard copy journal is the only way to go for me.

Most of what I write serves no purpose but to get it outside my head. But that is a worthy purpose. Don't let snoopy people keep you from doing what is right for you. If they will go to the trouble of picking a lock to read your thoughts, you may be better off kicking them to the curb. You do not have to justify or explain yourself. If they want to read it, then it's theirs to deal with.

~Madrone

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  • 2 weeks later...

I find jounaling my thoughts very useful. It allows me to get stuff that is bugging me out of my system, and my motto is "its better out than in". I dont want repressed emotions or thoughts resurfacing later on and biting me in the arse as a result.

shauna

ps how do i get a blog on this site?

Edited by Shauna
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i find that writing in a journal to be useful only to a certain extent. so many inane and depressing things go through my mind and i find that i cannot write down all the things that bother me, so... in the end i think about everything all over again and in result am back at square one.

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Guest Sabriel

I've kept a journal for a while now (two actually) and find it really useful for getting feelings out or clearing things up in my head as I find it really hard to express things. I keep a paper and online journal, an online one is useful I find because friends can respond to things you write, often giving advice or support :)

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I find it difficult to journal. I'm affraid my emotions will get the best of me. I get sooooooo angry when I start writing stuff down. I talked to my therapist about this on Wednesday and she helped me realize that the feelings do pass, it may take a while, but they do pass.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I started a dream journal back in November. I feel strongly that our dreams are our subconcious' way of getting our attention so that we can face things. And make some changes in our life for the better. I have many examples and would openly share insight about them but only if anyone was interested. For me this relates directly to my depression and I was able to put an end to a recurring nightmare since then. It is helping me to understand myself better and why I am who I am.

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Just before I did a little post on what depression is to me and I already feel better.

It does help to get out your feelings and know you're not alone. I've been journaling for years but got away from it for sometime now. (felt so bad lately I was afraid to write it down) But it did put things in perspective & made my mind feel clearer. One thing i did was write 10 positive things of the day at the end of my entry. Even if the best I could come up with was I didnt cry all morning or my new shoes fit good. Somehow that helped.

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For me, journaling is a way to let go of the feelings that are locked inside of me. Sometimes I'm so sad, I don't have the energy to journal, and later I discover if I had only written about my thoughts and feelings, I would have felt better a little sooner -

But it's not just about journaling alone. I think it needs to be used with other forms of therapy. And I don't necessarily mean therapy as counseling, but therapy in exercise, talking to friends, drawing, or eating properly, etc.

Writing is definitely a huge help to me. I also use writing in the form of creating fictional characters - in helping the characters overcome obstacles, I give myself control over a situation, and somehow that makes me feel better about whatever is going on in real life.

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I've been jotting down brief notes to myself about general questions, I think I may try the streaming thought approach. I tend to summarize things and edit them alot, hard to just write about nothing in particular...yet everything

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I've kept a journal off and on for probably 11 years. Mostly off. I started it to track this self-improvement phase that I was going though in college. Little did I know but I would have been better off on AD and speaking to a therapist instead of trying to improve myself. I was diagnosed with dysthymia, which I figure I've had for about 17 years.

Anyway, I just started writing in it again, upon the advice of my therapist. I've also started to write stream of consciousness things immediately after I wake up in the morning. Don't even get out of bed, and write for 10 or 15.

The thing I wonder is, what good does it do? If you don't share your journal with anyone, are you really coming clean with yourself and others about how you feel? Isn't it better to just let it all hang out, and let people see the real you? Some people will probably be hurt, scared, or upset by what you write, but others probably will see you reaching out and reciprocate. My problem has been that my dysthymia has isolated me, and I've kept people at arms lenght, never letting people get to know the real me. I think I'd like people to read my journal. The only problem, I suppose, is that if I had a blog, it would probably so inane that I'd get few repeat visitors.

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I've kept a journal off and on for probably 11 years. Mostly off. I started it to track this self-improvement phase that I was going though in college. Little did I know but I would have been better off on AD and speaking to a therapist instead of trying to improve myself. I was diagnosed with dysthymia, which I figure I've had for about 17 years.

Anyway, I just started writing in it again, upon the advice of my therapist. I've also started to write stream of consciousness things immediately after I wake up in the morning. Don't even get out of bed, and write for 10 or 15.

The thing I wonder is, what good does it do? If you don't share your journal with anyone, are you really coming clean with yourself and others about how you feel? Isn't it better to just let it all hang out, and let people see the real you? Some people will probably be hurt, scared, or upset by what you write, but others probably will see you reaching out and reciprocate. My problem has been that my dysthymia has isolated me, and I've kept people at arms lenght, never letting people get to know the real me. I think I'd like people to read my journal. The only problem, I suppose, is that if I had a blog, it would probably so inane that I'd get few repeat visitors.

I tihnk that there is some value to just getting things off your chest.

But also, I think it's also helpful to go back in our journals ans to see the progress that we've made over certain issues. We're so close to our issues, and they change so slowly that sometimes it's hard to see the forward progress that we have made. Or to recognize that a setback is just that--a setback, and we'll be back on track again soon.

KA

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I've kept a journal off and on for probably 11 years. Mostly off. I started it to track this self-improvement phase that I was going though in college. Little did I know but I would have been better off on AD and speaking to a therapist instead of trying to improve myself. I was diagnosed with dysthymia, which I figure I've had for about 17 years.

Anyway, I just started writing in it again, upon the advice of my therapist. I've also started to write stream of consciousness things immediately after I wake up in the morning. Don't even get out of bed, and write for 10 or 15.

The thing I wonder is, what good does it do? If you don't share your journal with anyone, are you really coming clean with yourself and others about how you feel? Isn't it better to just let it all hang out, and let people see the real you? Some people will probably be hurt, scared, or upset by what you write, but others probably will see you reaching out and reciprocate. My problem has been that my dysthymia has isolated me, and I've kept people at arms lenght, never letting people get to know the real me. I think I'd like people to read my journal. The only problem, I suppose, is that if I had a blog, it would probably so inane that I'd get few repeat visitors.

I believe when you journal, you are releasing the feelings you have inside of you, giving them validation and making them real. Sometimes it feels like you are set apart from the rest of the world when you are depressed, and like nothing you do matters to anyone. Writing those thoughts and feelings down on a piece of paper gives you a different perspecitve on yourself and offers you concrete evidence that what you are feeling is real...I think writing offers you the validation on your feelings that you sometimes can't get from people, and we all need validation on our thoughts and feelings.

I hope that makes sense. I always feel after I write that I have released my feelings and don't need to hang on so tightly to them anymore - maybe because sometimes when I'm depressed I feel lost and alone, and writing is a way for me to see that I exist and my feelings are real.

:hearts:

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I believe when you journal, you are releasing the feelings you have inside of you, giving them validation and making them real. Sometimes it feels like you are set apart from the rest of the world when you are depressed, and like nothing you do matters to anyone. Writing those thoughts and feelings down on a piece of paper gives you a different perspecitve on yourself and offers you concrete evidence that what you are feeling is real...I think writing offers you the validation on your feelings that you sometimes can't get from people, and we all need validation on our thoughts and feelings.

I hope that makes sense. I always feel after I write that I have released my feelings and don't need to hang on so tightly to them anymore - maybe because sometimes when I'm depressed I feel lost and alone, and writing is a way for me to see that I exist and my feelings are real.

:hearts:

I apologize in advance if I offend you, or anyone, but I’ve just got this chip on my shoulder today, and I can’t seem to do anything to get if off. As a result, I’m a little more direct, and possibly hostile, than usual. I’m sorry.

That being said . . . After I write, I don’t feel like a weight has been lifted. I just feel like I’ve spent some time writing down what is on my mind. For what that is worth, good or bad, fine, but I don’t feel as though I’ve released any feeling, or have made them real, or have validated them (what that means, I’ve got no idea. I think that is just a bit of pop psychology that we like to throw around, like “passive-aggressive”) or feel that I’m holding onto them less tightly.

I’ve been traveling a bit this past month and a half. I spent one week in NYC for work, and a week in FL for R&R. Both times, I thought to myself “Gee, I think a change of scenery is just what I need. I need to get away from my surroundings, and my problems.” Well, I found out that my problems and feelings have luggage, and don’t mind air travel, ‘cause when I got off the plane, my problems and feelings were still with me.

I think writing is the same for me. Now, please understand this is just me, if you get something out of it, bully for you. I wish that I did get something, some kind of respite from my mind. Frankly, the only utility I find in writing is retrospective. I find it interesting looking back months or years at what was going on, but again, I’m unsure of the therapeutic value of writing. But all that being said, I still write. I write in the morning, and evening. What I get out of it remains to be seen. Hopefully sometime soon I’ll find out.

Again, I apologize if I've offended. I just have this simmering rage that I can't shake today. Great, in addition to depression, now I've got rage issues!

Edited by 319_Please
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I am not offended at all! Writing is not for everyone, I was trying to convey my thoughts on the subject in answer to KeepingAwake's questions -

I hope you find what will work for you! I understand about problems staying with you no matter where you are.

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Hi...em I am new to this sort of thing, never really got into the whole forum deal though it really seems to be popular. Happened on this site by chance. I have really suffered from depression since i was like 8years old. Its weird because more and more the things I used to enjoy have no meaning, and as great as my friends are (especially to have put up with me) I still feel empty inside. Like life is just...just there. Whats worse is I have a degree in psychology, I plan on becoming a professional, but I have even lost my passion for that. I feel as though I should know better, just snap out of it stop being so self involved all the time. But these thoughts, the never ending drill of negativity that goes on in my head, picking and picking away till the point of madness..I scream for it to go away, but it keeps attacking at me. Even when the day was ok, I would still go over everything that happened, all the stupid things I said and did, what people think of me, why am I so stupid why can't I get things right.

Anyway I am starting to ramble like usual. I managed to stay away from doctors, not have anything to do with revealing my horrible secret to anyone, my pain, my hollowness my hoplesness. Until recently....ever since I was raped last year....its just come to a head....I can't avoid it now....there's no light to run to theirs only darkness. So I have been seeing a doctor who started me on anti-depressants. I am not really noticing any difference being on them. And it's been over a month. I know it takes time, but maybe I just can't be helped.

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319: Don't worry, I don't think you came off as offensive or angry at all. You were simply stating your opinion. Writing happens to be a form of expression for me, it always has been. For others, it's not. No big deal. I think it is nice that you still do it, because like you said it is good to be able to look back on yourself, for various reason.

woeful: I know it is hard, but try not to think too negatively. (Really hard I know!) I want to say that I don't think you should feel as though you cannot be helped. IF this is your first experience with doctors and such, you probably have your whole lifetime of things pent up. You said you were able to avoid doctors and telling people about your feelings...but I think part of dealing with them is admitting they are there, and sometimes this involves telling other people.

I am glad that you are seeing a dr now, in the long run it can't hurt. Most likely, it will help. And remember, you've got a lot of healing to do, so don't feel like it will never happen if it hasn't happened already. Just this past incident will require a lot of healing. It is not a bad sign that you haven't healed completely yet...if you did, I wouldn't believe it. It takes time. A month is not long enough, meds or no meds. And yes, they can sometimes take a while to work, and yes meds can help, but they really are only one factor...they can help, but the most healing comes from within you, and that takes time.

So try not to feel too hopeless....every step you take is one step towards feeling better. You need to get this off your chest, you need to know that the way you are feeling is not your fault. It is not because you are stupid or say the wrong things, it is because you have an illness, and you can take care of it. There are lots of different ways to fight it, and I believe that you will be able to find one, even if it takes time. Don't give up, you *will* feel better!

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319: Don't worry, I don't think you came off as offensive or angry at all. You were simply stating your opinion. Writing happens to be a form of expression for me, it always has been. For others, it's not. No big deal. I think it is nice that you still do it, because like you said it is good to be able to look back on yourself, for various reason.

woeful: I know it is hard, but try not to think too negatively. (Really hard I know!) I want to say that I don't think you should feel as though you cannot be helped. IF this is your first experience with doctors and such, you probably have your whole lifetime of things pent up. You said you were able to avoid doctors and telling people about your feelings...but I think part of dealing with them is admitting they are there, and sometimes this involves telling other people.

I am glad that you are seeing a dr now, in the long run it can't hurt. Most likely, it will help. And remember, you've got a lot of healing to do, so don't feel like it will never happen if it hasn't happened already. Just this past incident will require a lot of healing. It is not a bad sign that you haven't healed completely yet...if you did, I wouldn't believe it. It takes time. A month is not long enough, meds or no meds. And yes, they can sometimes take a while to work, and yes meds can help, but they really are only one factor...they can help, but the most healing comes from within you, and that takes time.

So try not to feel too hopeless....every step you take is one step towards feeling better. You need to get this off your chest, you need to know that the way you are feeling is not your fault. It is not because you are stupid or say the wrong things, it is because you have an illness, and you can take care of it. There are lots of different ways to fight it, and I believe that you will be able to find one, even if it takes time. Don't give up, you *will* feel better!

Cherub-

You say that writing is a form of expression for you. Do you mean that journal writing is a form or expression, of that you do some sort of creative writing? If you mean journal, what exactly do you get from it?

When I wrote last night, I was madder than a wet cat. It was just my mood for the day. After I finished, I was still angry at the world, but now a year from now I'll have a record of how miserable I was yesterday.

I toy with the idea of having a blog, as I think that would be more of a release for me, getting comments from people, or just letting people know how mental I am. For the time being though, that itch is scratched by posting to these forums.

Later,

319

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I just started a journal last night on my mothers advice. Before I knew it, I had typed 4 pages worth! It does help some to put thoughts into writing. I've always been better at that than actually being able to talk about things anyway.

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  • 3 weeks later...
I just started a journal last night on my mothers advice. Before I knew it, I had typed 4 pages worth! It does help some to put thoughts into writing. I've always been better at that than actually being able to talk about things anyway.

I have to agree with the journaling idea. I've been doing it for 5 or 6 years now, since I got sick really. I just write about how things have affected me, how i am feeling, and it often helps me sort out problems i don't know how to face because the thoughts are just swirling too madly in my head. It's helped me see some patterns I wasn't aware of. No big deal. It's just for me.

Edited by babsro
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I really don't think that journaling is for everyone. I used to keep a journal of my thoughts and feelings everyday. But one day I just sat and read through everything that I had written in the past, and it made me realize that my depression has gotten significantly worse throughout the years, so I have stopped.

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Yes, journals are good for getting things off your chest but I find afterwards I'm afraid, afraid that someone will find it.

Journals are pieces of paper, they can't reassure you, they can't tell you that everything's going to be alright. That's what I need.

Sometimes I'll write, but find I'm too scared to read what I've written. The best thing to do with a journal, in my opinion, is to get it all out and never look at it again. Never remember how sad you once were.

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