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It's every single night. Trying to sleep is waiting until I almost get there, paralysis, snapping out of it, moving positions, almost sleeping, paralysis. Rinse and repeat, all night. I get frozen, and auditory hallucinations are getting to be every time whereas they used to be rare. I got paralysis twice during naps years back,  I did have visual hallucinations. I don't know if they still are visual,  I make sure my room is completely dark. They give me panic attacks and instill anxiety, once I'm in the vulnerable exhausted state from cooling down from a panic attack, paralysis comes and kicks my butt again. I feel awful, I can't sleep, I fear sleeping or being tired because I know what is to come, I can't focus on anything.

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That sounds awful; I'm sorry you suffer so! 

Sleep has always been dangerous ground for me, too.  Actually, the lack thereof.  My insomnia started at puberty and has stuck around all my life.  In order to sleep without waking, I take 4 over the counter sleep meds (2 Alteril, 2 "Rest,)" my nighttime anti-depressants (that have a side effect of drowsiness), futz with my gabapentin, taking half the daily dosage, but all at once--then top it off with another over-the-counter sleep med called "Sleep Optimizer."  I kid myself by thinking "At least I'm not addicted to Ambien or some other prescription sleep med."  I also sleep in a slumber mask.

Has sleep always been this way for you?  I used to have a sleep paralysis recurring dream where something beneath me would clamp its arms tight around me and sometimes touch me inappropriately.  I used to dread sleep, yet hope for it every night.  I left that apartment, that state, and moved West to CA.  It took a couple of years for me to realize I hadn't had that dream since I moved, nor have I had it since leaving CA.  This, compiled with a few poltergeisty incidents led me to believe that whatever it was that wouldn't let me go, let me go once I left NY.  Was it a spirit?  I don't know.  Was it simple paralysis?  I don't know.  I rarely have sleep paralysis now, and on rare occasions if I do, it's usually a nightmare that wakes me.  

Maybe buy a slumber mask (Amazon: about 6 dollars); try an over-the-counter aid; and/or meditate once you lie down for the night.  Meditation can be simple as counting each breath--in and out equals one whole breath--up to 4, and start over: rinse, repeat.

Here's hoping you get the rest you need and deserve, however it comes.

WOTL (woman of the light)

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I know mom had it because she had sleep apnea.  It's so hard though.  I've had trouble sleeping my whole life too.  To figure things out for sure they might do a sleep study at a hospital.  We're already having trouble sleeping though and they'll expect you to sleep in a hospital with a bunch of wires hooked up to you.🤪

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Exactly!  I had one of those tests to track my sleep.  THERE WERE A MILLION WIRES on me and someone would come into the room and adjust them when they became displaced.  Ridiculous.  A diagnosis of no apnea, but no help in how I would get to sleep in the future.  🤔

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