Suicid@l but also Fearing Death ?

[June322]

Idk it’s ironic that I have been once again sinking into this dark hole that makes me want to end it all. And at the same times I have been crying myself to sleep over severe death anxiety ? The thought of just seizing to exist terrifies me . The way we die and how insignificant our lives and existence is makes me so sad. I can’t bare the thought of the day when I loose my mom too. All that to say that it really is ironic to be both suicid@l and fear death at the same time . I’ve been loosing so much sleep over it  too idk  does anyone here feel in the middle of these two things sometimes too ? 

[sober4life]

I usually feel both myself.  You've posted this in the anxiety section so like me you just want relief from the constant stress.  Leaving and being gone often feels more appealing than constantly trying to dig ourselves out of quicksand.  We just want a better life though in my opinion.  We want peace.  We want to live in a peaceful world.  We're tired of waking up to hell all the time.

[June322]

On 1/27/2022 at 8:56 AM, sober4life said:

I usually feel both myself.  You've posted this in the anxiety section so like me you just want relief from the constant stress.  Leaving and being gone often feels more appealing than constantly trying to dig ourselves out of quicksand.  We just want a better life though in my opinion.  We want peace.  We want to live in a peaceful world.  We're tired of waking up to hell all the time.

Thank you, you always have the most comforting responses  . I appreciate your presence on this website so much! 
i think you’re right it probably stems more from wanting peace and structure in my present time