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Starting to wish I had died


Thanos

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Last week I was involved in a nasty car accident where someone ran me off the road. I was afraid they were going to hit me so I slam on the brakes (not smart on a gravel road) and my car goes flying and ends up rolling over. My face is a complete mess, requiring about 8 stitches and 7 staples. Stayed in the ER for about 7 hours.

And here's where things go sour quickly. Before the crash the only hours I had been getting at work were delivery hours. Zero actual pharmacy tech hours. So now with no car I can't do any deliveries so they're refusing to give me any hours. They're giving those hours to people who were hired way after I had come on as a pharmacy tech. I'm even listed as a pharmacy tech and not a delivery driver on the roster but they still refuse to give me hours. I'm feeling like I'm being railroaded for something that was entirely not my fault. It makes me wish I had died in that crash because I cannot bear the thought of staying home doing **** all with my time. Plus since I have seniority over these other techs I think I should be getting a bulk of the hours but they're just giving me the scraps that are left over. The fact that I came away with my life means nothing to these people. The fact that I now can't pay my rent or buy food means nothing to these people. The fact that I am now terrified about the thought of getting behind the wheel means nothing to these people. The first question I get asked when I went back to work for just 3 hours as a backup to help out? "So when are you getting another car?". Not "how are you feeling" not "I'm so relieved you're okay" or anything. "When are you getting another car?" No empathy at all. Again all of this makes me wish I had died in the wreck.

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Unfortunately, the insensitivity of man towards man is a factor that many refuse to talk about or acknowledge. I'm sorry you're feeling the effects of it. 

Is there any way you can take a paid sick leave?  A car accident and follow-up treatment like you've had warrant a MINIMUM of 90 days to recover from, both physically and emotionally/psychologically!  And it's possible the soft tissue injuries you've sustained won't kick in with all their pain until maybe weeks later, at which time you'll know you need musculoskeletal repair/treatment.  Do you have insurance?  Did anyone take x-rays while you were in the ER?  If not, that's okay.  But you'll need some if/when the pain kicks in.  I was in a bad car accident in February of one year and didn't take leave until three months later for 90 days--during which time I had massage and physical therapy, and eventually steroid injections in some of the discs in my lumbar spine.  Trust me, when/if you're recovering, you're not doing ****-all with your time!  You may have to go into battle for yourself with this job, but that is a worthy cause!

You have my thoughts and good wishes.  PM me if you need to talk or have any questions.

WOTL

 

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Wow. That really sucks (says Captain Obvious).

There seems to be a complete lack of empathy out there in employment land.

I think WOTL's post above is spot on. I can't add anything to it, except to wish you the best.

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49 minutes ago, womanofthelight said:

Unfortunately, the insensitivity of man towards man is a factor that many refuse to talk about or acknowledge. I'm sorry you're feeling the effects of it. 

Is there any way you can take a paid sick leave?  A car accident and follow-up treatment like you've had warrant a MINIMUM of 90 days to recover from, both physically and emotionally/psychologically!  And it's possible the soft tissue injuries you've sustained won't kick in with all their pain until maybe weeks later, at which time you'll know you need musculoskeletal repair/treatment.  Do you have insurance?  Did anyone take x-rays while you were in the ER?  If not, that's okay.  But you'll need some if/when the pain kicks in.  I was in a bad car accident in February of one year and didn't take leave until three months later for 90 days--during which time I had massage and physical therapy, and eventually steroid injections in some of the discs in my lumbar spine.  Trust me, when/if you're recovering, you're not doing ****-all with your time!  You may have to go into battle for yourself with this job, but that is a worthy cause!

You have my thoughts and good wishes.  PM me if you need to talk or have any questions.

WOTL

 

1) I cannot take any paid sick leave, but I do have some workman's comp payments that should be coming since the accident happened while I was on the clock. I doubt it'll be much since I'm still in the retail field (pharmacy but still retail) but I'm trying to get as much as I can get.

2) I have insurance that should take care of most of my bills but again since I'm in retail I'm not sure how much I'll have to pay before the insurance kicks in.

3) I had both x-rays and CT scans taken at the ER and luckily (or not depending on the point of view) all I suffered were cuts and a crack in my cheekbone about the size of a quarter. Nothing that requires surgery unless I want to fix the physical scars but that will be all out of pocket since no insurance on earth is gonna pay for plastic surgery.

4) I've already gone through my pharmaceutical treatment. Took my allotment of Norco and Amox-Clav that lasted about a week. The psychological scars are much deeper though. This was my second car that got totaled in 3 years and this was so bad that even the thought of getting behind the wheel of a car again scares the shit out of me. I don't want to drive for fear that another person will run me off the road. Plus I have zero money for another car anyway.

5) To wrap this up, I also got a doctor's note that cleared me to return to work starting this week but my employer refuses to give me any hours, instead giving those hours to people that have less seniority than I do. I've been here for a bit over a year and yet I'm struggling to get any meaningful amount of hours at work while the people who are newer than I am are getting close to full time hours. That is why I wish I had died because these people obviously don't give a rat's ass about how I'm feeling or how much I need to work with the upcoming bills that I'm going to have to pay off. I don't matter, all I am to them is someone who was an errand boy and now that I don't have a car they have no more use for me. I'm being tossed aside like week-old leftovers.

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On 11/19/2021 at 2:19 PM, womanofthelight said:

Unfortunately, the insensitivity of man towards man is a factor that many refuse to talk about or acknowledge. I'm sorry you're feeling the effects of it. 

Is there any way you can take a paid sick leave?  A car accident and follow-up treatment like you've had warrant a MINIMUM of 90 days to recover from, both physically and emotionally/psychologically!  And it's possible the soft tissue injuries you've sustained won't kick in with all their pain until maybe weeks later, at which time you'll know you need musculoskeletal repair/treatment.  Do you have insurance?  Did anyone take x-rays while you were in the ER?  If not, that's okay.  But you'll need some if/when the pain kicks in.  I was in a bad car accident in February of one year and didn't take leave until three months later for 90 days--during which time I had massage and physical therapy, and eventually steroid injections in some of the discs in my lumbar spine.  Trust me, when/if you're recovering, you're not doing ****-all with your time!  You may have to go into battle for yourself with this job, but that is a worthy cause!

You have my thoughts and good wishes.  PM me if you need to talk or have any questions.

WOTL

 

Wanted to reply again just to say that for some reason I can't send PMs to you, because I really do need someone to talk to about everything that happened. I'm sad most of the time and spend most of my days sleeping in my bed because I don't have the motivation to do anything else. No word on when they want me back either. I feel so worthless.

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