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A little bit what happened today


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Frankly speaking, I am always a fair person. Today someone got mad at me for something I REALLY DIDN'T DO WRONG. Everyone can conclude that his madness was solely out of his selfishness. It's hard to tell everything in details but in short form, he made an appointment for me for a time, e.g. 4:00pm at a place, I said OK, and then he finished his mess earlier than expected and he came to the place at 3:00pm and kept flooding me with phone messages, requesting that I came out immediately, rather than our agreed time but I always muted my phone and I didn't look at the phone during the time.

When I came out at our agreed time, he showed all the horrible attitude and spoke all the rude language. I was shocked, I wasn't able to react immediately, it was simply RIDICULOUS. I didn't react immediately because I know myself well, if I shout back at him and say all the rude language my negative emotion will be largely lifted at the same time, I will not just feel so good or relaxed by scolding at people, but at the same time, I was feeling so angry....

Realistically, everything about him in my life is over, it was a one-time appointment and deal between us and I have nothing else to follow up, I truly understand this, but the problem is I keep thinking about this ridiculous thing in my mind and what I am doing is largely affected. I planned to have a good tea time and bought something after I met him, but I then went back home immediately because I felt that I didn't have this energy to even drink or buy something, and now I am typing this passage here..

Do you read me? I really wish to know how I can get less emotionally affected for someone or something that shouldn't affect me anymore. This is not the first time ever that happened to me......

I tried deep breathing, or thinking logically, but it just doesn't help, I hope my anger will go away faster and my life comes back to normal faster.

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 10/23/2021 at 4:21 PM, louis2008 said:

Frankly speaking, I am always a fair person. Today someone got mad at me for something I REALLY DIDN'T DO WRONG. Everyone can conclude that his madness was solely out of his selfishness. It's hard to tell everything in details but in short form, he made an appointment for me for a time, e.g. 4:00pm at a place, I said OK, and then he finished his mess earlier than expected and he came to the place at 3:00pm and kept flooding me with phone messages, requesting that I came out immediately, rather than our agreed time but I always muted my phone and I didn't look at the phone during the time.

When I came out at our agreed time, he showed all the horrible attitude and spoke all the rude language. I was shocked, I wasn't able to react immediately, it was simply RIDICULOUS. I didn't react immediately because I know myself well, if I shout back at him and say all the rude language my negative emotion will be largely lifted at the same time, I will not just feel so good or relaxed by scolding at people, but at the same time, I was feeling so angry....

Realistically, everything about him in my life is over, it was a one-time appointment and deal between us and I have nothing else to follow up, I truly understand this, but the problem is I keep thinking about this ridiculous thing in my mind and what I am doing is largely affected. I planned to have a good tea time and bought something after I met him, but I then went back home immediately because I felt that I didn't have this energy to even drink or buy something, and now I am typing this passage here..

Do you read me? I really wish to know how I can get less emotionally affected for someone or something that shouldn't affect me anymore. This is not the first time ever that happened to me......

I tried deep breathing, or thinking logically, but it just doesn't help, I hope my anger will go away faster and my life comes back to normal faster.

I had many similar experiences. You did the right thing by not reacting. Reaction always hurt us for a longer time. 

I allowed it to pass and time will heal. Do you have a hobby? Indulging in the hobby will help it pass faster.

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