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I think I am in an abusive relationship


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Hello everyone....I think I am in an abusive relationship. 

 

The closest thing I have to a significant other is a 45 year old woman who is my former fiancée from about 15 years ago. She has two children both in their teens. She is always asking me for things. Money usually, but then sometimes rides for her and her kids to the store or other location. Last Friday she requested my help for her apartment complex. She's the caretaker of a single building - 12 unit apartment complex and wanted to trim bushes and trees....a lot of work. I bought a used saw from Craigslist and on Sunday we began work at 9:00. By 1 pm we had a large pile of branches. Personally I felt it was the responsibility of the landlord (not her) to take care of such issues, but he's more or less a slum lord - hardly fixing problems on site, no lawn or grounds maintenance, nothing. 

 

Anyway, she has this habit of calling or texting me. Now if I don't reply back with in a minute or two, she throws an absolute temper tantrum and says she never wants to see or talk to me again and blah blah blah....I know I should just block her and let her fend for herself. But I hate to say it, I love her. I am 45 years old too and I feel this is the closest I will ever come to having a family of my own.

 

My ex-wife couldn't have children as she had a hysterectomy when we were engaged. I've tried dating but no women want to date me, I am always "friends". 

 

It's affecting my mind too....I have even started to hurt myself by cutting on my upper arms. 

 

Don't I deserve to be happy??? I don't know what to do. I really don't know what to do. 

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