Face it, all of us are alone

[iWantRope]

You need to be kind to yourself because no one else in the world WILL.

You need to help yourself because no one else in the world WILL.

[watalife]

Yes i agree. It has taken me a long time to figure this out. Family is not a given. Fake it till you make it are words to live by in this cold and lonely world. I have no idea what I'm saying so please bear with me.

[Oscar K]

You both make good points in this crazy crowded world.

We really do have immense responsibility for our psyches.

That is when the clever and powerful metaphors can help us navigate through our troubles.

We change our brain chemistry ever so slightly when a metaphor is invoked.

That is because metaphors only exist when we imagine, pretend and make believe them into existence.

I woke up this morning with a troubling memory so I promptly dropped a bunch of heavy metaphorical boulders on this unnecessary and bothersome thought.

We are not helpless confronting our problems.

Make friends with your unlimited supply of clever and powerful metaphors or as I like to call them: CLEVERFUL MEDaphors.

Maybe this can help a little.

Oscar

[sober4life]

It's why I've made myself completely self sufficient.  I will never expect people to be there for me again.  I will expect to go through everything on my own and be pleasantly surprised and also suspicious any time someone helps me.

[monicott17]

Yep! These days I trust almost no one. And the few I do trust, well that number is getting smaller.

[watalife]

@iWantRope I thought you were married. So technically your not all alone ❤

[Evergreenforst4]

10 hours ago, Oscar K said:

You both make good points in this crazy crowded world.

We really do have immense responsibility for our psyches.

That is when the clever and powerful metaphors can help us navigate through our troubles.

We change our brain chemistry ever so slightly when a metaphor is invoked.

That is because metaphors only exist when we imagine, pretend and make believe them into existence.

I woke up this morning with a troubling memory so I promptly dropped a bunch of heavy metaphorical boulders on this unnecessary and bothersome thought.

We are not helpless confronting our problems.

Make friends with your unlimited supply of clever and powerful metaphors or as I like to call them: CLEVERFUL MEDaphors.

Maybe this can help a little.

Oscar

You should win an Oscar for the CLEVERFUL MEDaphors

Edited May 4, 2021 by Evergreenforst4
clever to cleverful to CLEVERFUL

[iWantRope]

2 hours ago, watalife said:

@iWantRope I thought you were married. So technically your not all alone 

LOL what gave you the idea that I am

[watalife]

You said so. Lol

[duck]

On 5/4/2021 at 3:31 AM, iWantRope said:

You need to be kind to yourself because no one else in the world WILL.

You need to help yourself because no one else in the world WILL.

True.

[ladysmurf]

It took me  years to figure it out, but it's the truth......i'm a loser and all alone

[Oscar K]

You are not a loser to us and you are not alone here.

Chin up!

[ladysmurf]

4 hours ago, Oscar K said:

You are not a loser to us and you are not alone here.

Chin up!

im just fed up......all these years, no solution, hardly any good changes....who wants this type of lifestyle.....i dont want this forever.....nor do i wish it on anyone.......

[Atra]

Love yourself. Nobody in this world can love you enough to compensate for self-hatred. 

Heal yourself. No one can heal you except you. 

It is a cold world and help is everywhere. But nobody can help you until you're ready to be helped. And help usually doesn't come in the form you think it ought to. 

[ladysmurf]

8 hours ago, Atra said:

Love yourself. Nobody in this world can love you enough to compensate for self-hatred. 

Heal yourself. No one can heal you except you. 

It is a cold world and help is everywhere. But nobody can help you until you're ready to be helped. And help usually doesn't come in the form you think it ought to. 

Atra, if i didn't love myself and try to heal myself, I wouldn't be here after so many decades of battling with my illness... but after a while this illness gets to you, and there's only so much a person can handle and take in...the system is corrupt and fails many of us...no one cares, aside from yourself, you are right about that. but we all have limits..that's all i'm saying.

[Atra]

17 hours ago, ladysmurf said:

but we all have limits..

That's certain. 

I must believe healing is possible for you and everyone because to believe otherwise would mean I doubt that healing is possible for me. 

Navigating through a broken mental health system that relies on other broken systems, searching for the right sort of help, treated as if we're faceless--that's cause for despair and anger. I have told myself no one cares because that seemed the most sane explanation for the way things are. The best explanation until I found a better one. 

[Nightjar]

2 hours ago, Atra said:

. I have told myself no one cares because that seemed the most sane explanation for the way things are. The best explanation until I found a better one. 

I agree that people care. Not everyone cares, certainly...... But a lot, lot, lot of people do. We're up against a lot of fear and misunderstanding when it comes to mental illness which is a major obstacle when it comes to getting help. But I do believe that this is changing and that understanding is happening more and more through people of all walks of life making things clearer for folks in general to understand.

Maybe they won't fully understand but any improvement in understanding is good I think.. 

People may be slow on the uptake sometimes and a lot of people really dont get it but I don't think that is the same thing as not caring.

There are so, so many more people who get it these days too as a result of covid. I know I feel more comfortable talking about my mental health now, if a little apprehensive about the stigma

 

[sober4life]

I can talk freely to random people I don't know that don't know me but the people close to me will never know me at all.

[ladysmurf]

On 5/8/2021 at 7:26 AM, Nightjar said:

I agree that people care. Not everyone cares, certainly...... But a lot, lot, lot of people do. We're up against a lot of fear and misunderstanding when it comes to mental illness which is a major obstacle when it comes to getting help. But I do believe that this is changing and that understanding is happening more and more through people of all walks of life making things clearer for folks in general to understand.

Maybe they won't fully understand but any improvement in understanding is good I think.. 

People may be slow on the uptake sometimes and a lot of people really dont get it but I don't think that is the same thing as not caring.

There are so, so many more people who get it these days too as a result of covid. I know I feel more comfortable talking about my mental health now, if a little apprehensive about the stigma

 

very few care you are lucky if you find them...in this industry its all about the money........very few doctors i've seen truly cared...

[anon22ae]

Agreed also.

"We live as we dream -- alone. While the dream disappears, the life continues painfully.” [Joseph Conrad]

But at least dreams seem to be a temporary respite from depression. It's as though depression doesn't exist in that state. I was wondering whether anyone else has experienced this.

[Nightjar]

On 5/9/2021 at 8:11 PM, ladysmurf said:

very few care you are lucky if you find them...in this industry its all about the money........very few doctors i've seen truly cared...

I agree that many doctors simply don't understand. They don't feel you. But if they haven't experienced it, how could they? 

I think the compassionate ones are the ones who have experienced it themselves.... And plenty of doctors have

 

[duck]

Another rough day.  Too much stress which causes me headaches.  I also have a sore neck.  My doctor confirmed it is tension.  I need to move to a beautiful quiet place and relax.  Is there such a place?  Probably not.  

I had a Zoom session with my therapist today.  It was a waste of money and time.   I need to get out of this anxiety/depression situation.  

My neighbor helped me changed the outdoor tap which we connect the garden hose to.  It was leaking so I bought a new valve two years ago and finally got it changed today.  I was afraid to change it myself because it is a copper pipe and one has to hold it firm.

I did some shredding late tonight.  I have things under control.  Over the past months I shredded many old income tax returns and old credit card receipts.   

[mikeb6901]

Im just the opposite here.  I know I am not alone.  I have a lot of loving and wonderful people who care for me and only want to help.  The problem is I don't want them to.  I would rather live my life alone like a hermit in the woods.  I just want to be left alone so I don't mess up anyones life and bring them down to my misery level.

[ladysmurf]

5 hours ago, Nightjar said:

I agree that many doctors simply don't understand. They don't feel you. But if they haven't experienced it, how could they? 

I think the compassionate ones are the ones who have experienced it themselves.... And plenty of doctors have

 

do you think they have felt it themselves, perhaps that's why they go into this field? or maybe saw someone close to them suffering?

[In2deep4me]

I disagree in general. You're alone because you don't interact with others. Plenty of people are looking for friends and companionship. It's a 2-way street. I have very few friends because I chose that, not because I can't make friends. My partner is my best friend. She loves me and she cares. So does my daughter. The friends I had I alienated because of this damned disease. That's on me, not them.

As for doctors, sure, they are or seem to not truly care. You are their job, not their family or friend. They need to remain distant on a personal level to keep their objectivity and do their job. The medical field is big business and a numbers game, like most any other industry. That doesn't mean you can't find a good doctor who cares about your health. That doesn't mean they want to be your friend or best buddy. My GP is extremely caring about my health. My Pdoc is a decent person but is mainly cycling meds until she hits one that works. That is very typical in the mental health industry. Your wounds aren't as simple as a cut. You get cut up, they stitch you up, you move on. That sort of medicine is easy to deal with.

Given this pandemic, I believe you will see lots of changes in mental health coming down the road. All those so-called normal people are getting a harsh dose of what depression is. They have felt it now and know it's real, and it sucks. You're seeing doctors and most certainly nurses who are burnt out in a year of this Covid nightmare. They're in big need of help to stabilise their mental health.