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Svenetc

How to explain or express that you feel empty ?

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Hi,

I just wonder about how you could explain your inside feelings to somebody.

Explain  to someone that you feel empty.

I am 48, basically full of spark and energy - yet empty. I know what I feel and what I want. I know I can work for countless hours and days, I know I can teach values, I know who I am. But I am empty.

Any direction I turn there is a road block.The people around me think I am full of spark and full of energy all the time. They know I am full of humor and sarcasm. However they do not see that I am literally EMPTY. I can't do it no more. I am sick of it. I am sick of pretending that I am fine while I am not. How do I get that message across  to people without hurting their feelings ?

Any hints or something please ?  Anyone lived a life pretending it was fine but it was way not fine ?

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My experience reveals depression to be a natural formation / resource.

I invoke the cave metaphor to describe my depression.

A cave in nature is formed by erosion, stress and upheaval.

I believe everyone of us is  metaphorically EMPTY.

The issue becomes just what do we do with that emptiness.

For me it ain't going away any time soon so I may as well put my depression "cave" to use.

I must try to keep myself metaphorically "anchored" outside my deep , dark dangerous abyss.

I give myself permission to take temporary shelter inside myself but long-term residence is not a healthy option.

Anyway maybe this can be food for thought.

Always here to discuss metaphors.

Oscar 

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25 minutes ago, Oscar K said:

I give myself permission to take temporary shelter inside myself but long-term residence is not a healthy option.

I can't understand the rest but that one I do and agree - if  will be temporary I do not know yet

Thanks though !  

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I think it can be communicated to some people. Others may not want to hear it, or will feel uncomfortable. At times in my life, I've blatantly expressed a nihilistic attitude, and can tell you for sure that it can damage relationships. As humans I think we have to walk a fine line between openness of expression, and making others feel comfortable.

Probably that emptiness you speak of is more common than you'd think. In Buddhism they speak of "Duhka," or unsatisfactoriness, as a fact of life. It is through unhappiness that we know what happiness is.

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Perhaps embrace authenticity if wearing a mask has become dreadful?

There's pressure to perform for others when we're depressed and the emptiness feeling is an aspect of depression. What does empty feel like to you today?

Figuring out who is safe to talk to about this can be a chore. Hopefully you'll count us as safe and you've made a good start here. 

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8 hours ago, csam said:

In Buddhism they speak of "Duhka," or unsatisfactoriness, as a fact of life. It is through unhappiness that we know what happiness is.

Thanks ! I like that sort of. I am non religious after all. I just believe in trust and karma , But to reach happiness by knowing what unhappy is a great way to see it. That is also valid with many other things in life. You have to know what the "other side" looks like to appreciate the level you achieved. Sometimes it might be painful but it is well worth it - yet dangerous in certain ways.

2 hours ago, Atra said:

There's pressure to perform for others when we're depressed and the emptiness feeling is an aspect of depression. What does empty feel like to you today?

See - I have not pressure but I have desire to perform. Not necessary for others but for my own sake,  If the feeling empty is an aspect of depression, then I would like to remove that from my bucket list. I can check it off. Today is only 1 hour "old" for me yet but I already question the purpose of myself. It is my day off and I will have to wait for 22 more hours before I can go back to work. Some people tell me to find a Hobby...great...I don't search because I know what I like and what not, but I am lost in myself. So I enjoy what I can and do what I can but do not try to force myself to lose my identity - my authentic self. When daylight is here I will hand wash my car today. That is the highlight of my day. I know what I am doing, why I do it and get satisfaction for a bit. The remainder of my day will be - Empty!

8 hours ago, csam said:

As humans I think we have to walk a fine line between openness of expression, and making others feel comfortable.

I walk that line all my life. I am always open and I learned over time, that it can hurt people as well or it can allow them to open up. Great example is that I had and have friends that are "different" because they are gay. Not my choice- but yet the best friends to talk to. Why? Because there is a level of trust established caused by being an open minded person without judgement. Others that know I am an open book use that advantage and use it against me because the found my vulnerable spots . So that line is there but not easy to walk on. 

 

2 hours ago, Atra said:

Figuring out who is safe to talk to about this can be a chore. Hopefully you'll count us as safe and you've made a good start here. 

That is exactly why I am here 😀

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7 hours ago, Svenetc said:

I am non religious after all.

I'm also non religious, not trying to push buddhism or anything haha. I was always anti-religious and don't like religious dogma, but have been interested lately in what some religions have to say about anger and depression. It's a tale as old as time.

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2 minutes ago, csam said:

I'm also non religious, not trying to push buddhism or anything haha. I was always anti-religious and don't like religious dogma, but have been interested lately in what some religions have to say about anger and depression. It's a tale as old as time.

That is nice.... because I do find interesting lines in different beliefs or religions that encourage me. I never thought about soulmates or twin flames in my life prior. I learn now. I however do not believe that there is somebody controlling all of that. It is all us. Each one and their heart and mindset will determine how life goes. I hit a huge pothole and now I research here and elsewhere on how to fix me and that pothole. It is inspiring to find people like you and others to exchange and share thoughts.

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