Jump to content

Work Thread


June322

Recommended Posts

I’ve been struggling a lot at work . It gives me so much anxiety just thinking that I have to go back tomorrow. 
the environment there is so toxic. I’ve been getting chewed up by a lot of people there. 
I try hard to keep my head up by head has been feeling heavy 😔

I know many people experience  shit times at work and I wanted to make a thread for people to talK about it here. And maybe give some advice on how to get through it 

it’s hard because specially right now with the pandemic, it’s not easy to just find another job . Especially when it seems like they all have the same type of hostile environment that is occupied by the same type of people that make work that much unbearable 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Great idea for a thread, @June322! My job is the source of constant anxiety and dread. I'm in over my head. Over the past year, our workload has increased dramatically and it has taken its toll on many people. I have one employee who is constantly pushing back against me--and the boss. I'm supposed to be in charge of Mr. Pushback but he's by far the smartest guy on staff. He knows everything. By not repeatedly yanking on his leash (not my style in the first place), my boss sees me as ineffective. Well, maybe I am. Actually...yes, I definitely am. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites


First, I am sorry you have to put up with crap at work @June322. And you of course, @JD4010. We have compared our respective “black lists” elsewhere on df, I recall.

I probably wouldn’t even be on df if it weren’t for my “career”, ie. drifting through a succession of dead end jobs all my life. Drifting through life. I don’t know how to make decisions. More to the point, everything is just meh and whatever. I am crap at everything and I don’t really have interests. It’s like I lack soul. So I just settle with anything I can get.
 

Yes, COVID isn’t making job-hopping easy. Not that I have found it easy before.   Nowadays I have more or less given up. I will never find a job I would be happy doing. I will never get a decent pension. I am terrified of the idea of pension. My whole adult life is one big failure. I have never managed to get a degree and to be completely honest, I probably failed because I have never known what to do with myself in the first place.
 

The only way I cope is not to think. At all. About anything than my immediate future, as in daily groceries, should I work out today, what record shall I play when I get home, etc.
 

Thinking about anything else just makes me face the fact that the future sucks. I have no reason to believe that anything will change as all my efforts in the past have led nowhere at all. The only lesson I have learnt is that nothing is worth the effort. 
 

I am sorry I’m not much help. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I hate work also and it really interferes with my free time. But I couldn't imagine just sitting here all day I would be a whole lot worse. Everywhere I work there is a problem with someone or everyone. 😵 They call me every name you can think of mostly crazy and sick.😾

Link to comment
Share on other sites

10 minutes ago, iWantRope said:

F**k work. I am 2 URGENT PRIORITY emails from picking up the phone & screaming every expletive in every language ever to the clients.

I chuckled as I read that even though you didn't mean it to be "funny." I was in the same exact state of mind yesterday. I'm slightly better today because I have a much-dreaded meeting behind me now. Tomorrow will probably bring me right back down into the trench though.

@samadhiSheol I don't know how to make decisions either. I suck at it. I listen to arguments about a subject and I think, "gee, both sides are correct." My position is like being a Colonel in the military, but I think like a Private. Or don't think. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've cussed out customers plenty of times.  I'm usually friendly but I hold everything inside until I blow up like a bomb.  So I'm a very hard worker and very friendly until my last day at pretty much every job I've ever had.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 hours ago, JD4010 said:

 

@samadhiSheol I don't know how to make decisions either. I suck at it. I listen to arguments about a subject and I think, "gee, both sides are correct." My position is like being a Colonel in the military, but I think like a Private. Or don't think. 

In my case the options are more like a "lose-lose" situation. All moot, whatever I do.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am constantly filled with anxiety and it gets worse on a work day. I work at a supermarket but I don’t like being around lots of people. Every day I go in, I worry about what kind of crap I’ll have to put up with that day.

Example: Just yesterday, while I was in the restroom (where I cannot hear if they call me) I was called - apparently several times - over the p.a. I finished, came out and was told there was a clean up and it seems the assistant manager was REALLY upset that “nobody” (me) answered the page. I only know that because I heard my supervisor tell another employee how angry he was (he actually threw a wet floor sign half way down the empty aisle). Like NOBODY else in the store has the “ability” to do a clean up.

 I hate my job, I hate where I live, I hate interacting with people, I hate my life.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can’t report him for two reasons: 

1. I have a problem with speaking up (especially about an asst. manager). And—

2. He’s USUALLY a nice guy. Maybe he was just having a bad day. I don’t know.

But doesn’t being a manager come with a certain amount of responsibility and “professionalism”? Whatever. I don’t know anymore.

Just knowing that he was that upset and that is was mainly MY fault doesn’t help. I saw him at least once today in passing so I just looked at the floor. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/17/2021 at 9:32 AM, JD4010 said:

Great idea for a thread, @June322! My job is the source of constant anxiety and dread. I'm in over my head. Over the past year, our workload has increased dramatically and it has taken its toll on many people. I have one employee who is constantly pushing back against me--and the boss. I'm supposed to be in charge of Mr. Pushback but he's by far the smartest guy on staff. He knows everything. By not repeatedly yanking on his leash (not my style in the first place), my boss sees me as ineffective. Well, maybe I am. Actually...yes, I definitely am. 

Ouch that’s a tricky position to be in. I’ve been in that spot where my boss wants me in charge of certain people when I myself do not have the title to be telling anyone what to do. You don’t sound ineffective! Your boss should not expect you to have the power to control how others work 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/17/2021 at 6:01 PM, iWantRope said:

F**k work. I am 2 URGENT PRIORITY emails from picking up the phone & screaming every expletive in every language ever to the clients.

In my head I quit everyday 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/17/2021 at 1:17 PM, samadhiSheol said:


First, I am sorry you have to put up with crap at work @June322. And you of course, @JD4010. We have compared our respective “black lists” elsewhere on df, I recall.

I probably wouldn’t even be on df if it weren’t for my “career”, ie. drifting through a succession of dead end jobs all my life. Drifting through life. I don’t know how to make decisions. More to the point, everything is just meh and whatever. I am crap at everything and I don’t really have interests. It’s like I lack soul. So I just settle with anything I can get.
 

Yes, COVID isn’t making job-hopping easy. Not that I have found it easy before.   Nowadays I have more or less given up. I will never find a job I would be happy doing. I will never get a decent pension. I am terrified of the idea of pension. My whole adult life is one big failure. I have never managed to get a degree and to be completely honest, I probably failed because I have never known what to do with myself in the first place.
 

The only way I cope is not to think. At all. About anything than my immediate future, as in daily groceries, should I work out today, what record shall I play when I get home, etc.
 

Thinking about anything else just makes me face the fact that the future sucks. I have no reason to believe that anything will change as all my efforts in the past have led nowhere at all. The only lesson I have learnt is that nothing is worth the effort. 
 

I am sorry I’m not much help. 

Sharing your story is plenty help! Especially because I can relate to it all :/ . It really does seems like everyone else has it together but ourselves . Sometimes it’s good to hear that others don’t have it all figure out either . Life is a general shit storm.
But we’re already here . So if thinking about what record to put on or what movie to watch next brings a moment of peace and happiness, then I think that’s all that matters in the moment . 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Yesterday I found out that a Guy that just got hired on 4 months a go , got a promotion. 
 

this really boiled my blood because his promotion was not based on his hard work or knowledge about the job. But based on the fact that his two uncles work there.

to top it off I talked to my manager about my brothers position at work. They had him doing a level 3 and Level 4 job for a little over a year but didn’t want to pay him the salary for it. They refuse to Give him the pay and tittle for the work he was doing and maintained it as if he was doing a lower grade job when he wasn’t . Then they just now finally give him a 50 cent raise and move his title to level 3 to fit the job he had already been doing for the past year . But then they said they won’t give him the bonus they give all

employees every year. I told the manager it didn’t seem fair and he said it’s my brother business not mine which fair enough . But then he said we should be grateful and happy he got promoted . 
 

yeah finally got paid for the job he was already doing for a whole year. It took them a year to promote him to the position he was already in.

not to mention this new guy got that promotion in 5 months with the pay . It took everything in me not to go off on him .

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/16/2021 at 5:07 PM, June322 said:

I’ve been struggling a lot at work . It gives me so much anxiety just thinking that I have to go back tomorrow. 
the environment there is so toxic. I’ve been getting chewed up by a lot of people there. 
I try hard to keep my head up by head has been feeling heavy 😔

I know many people experience  shit times at work and I wanted to make a thread for people to talK about it here. And maybe give some advice on how to get through it 

it’s hard because specially right now with the pandemic, it’s not easy to just find another job . Especially when it seems like they all have the same type of hostile environment that is occupied by the same type of people that make work that much unbearable 

I know you you feel.  I worked at one of those type of places in the past.  I was walking on eggshells all the time.  It was almost unbearable.  I absolutely hated it.  Many officers did not like it there.  I was removed from an account and it was probably the worst feeling in the world.  I hated myself.  I tried to forgive myself but I always had trouble letting it go.  I always gave myself a hard time for these things.  Especially work related.

I am 29 almost 30 later and I am still trying to establish myself in a career.  I second and third guess myself all the time.  I don’t feel competent because I hold onto my past failures and it is devastating because I play back these old memories constantly whenever I need to make a call.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 hours ago, June322 said:

In my head I quit everyday 

Glad to hear I'm not the only one. Haha. But then I imagine what it would be like to live in a cardboard appliance carton in below zero weather. 😞

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Guys!  I just took a HUGE step forward.  I finally deleted the voicemail of me being placed on suspension for a mistake!  I used to play it every once in a while and I used to do it for no other reason other than to remind myself of a mistake that DOES NOT define me!  It feels so up lifting to do it!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Lately my job has been causing me so much anxiety I wake up almost every hour in the night until my 0430 alarm goes off. I have such a love hate relationship with my job... I’m an RN in a hospital and love to help others, but often work with not enough resources and constantly have to be in a reactive state. I struggle with self worth and have issues not tying it to my patients outcome and satisfaction, even though logically I know that is more times than not out of my control. I feel so emotionally drained by the time I come home I have no desire for self care or to interact with others.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

17 hours ago, NitNat said:

Lately my job has been causing me so much anxiety I wake up almost every hour in the night until my 0430 alarm goes off. I have such a love hate relationship with my job... I’m an RN in a hospital and love to help others, but often work with not enough resources and constantly have to be in a reactive state. I struggle with self worth and have issues not tying it to my patients outcome and satisfaction, even though logically I know that is more times than not out of my control. I feel so emotionally drained by the time I come home I have no desire for self care or to interact with others.

You're a nurse during a pandemic.  You're a hero.  Thank you for everything that you do.❤️:buttrock:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can’t break this cycle.  I have the job experience to complete a simple security task, but because I’m so anxious and tired, I did not have the energy to make the right call today in front of my supervisor and it makes me sick.  The funny part is I was so tired I didn’t even realize the mistake I made.  I’ve had maybe 4 hrs of sleep in the past 3 nights, but I’m still going into work every day.  The job makes me so nervous dealing with new things.  The policies and procedures.  It takes a lot out of me.  And a few days ago, I messed up a simple task and now a microscopes on me, during my 2nd week.  I can’t stop thinking about this and I replay bad, negative memories over and over again in my head.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, I need a hero said:

I can’t break this cycle.  I have the job experience to complete a simple security task, but because I’m so anxious and tired, I did not have the energy to make the right call today in front of my supervisor and it makes me sick.  The funny part is I was so tired I didn’t even realize the mistake I made.  I’ve had maybe 4 hrs of sleep in the past 3 nights, but I’m still going into work every day.  The job makes me so nervous dealing with new things.  The policies and procedures.  It takes a lot out of me.  And a few days ago, I messed up a simple task and now a microscopes on me, during my 2nd week.  I can’t stop thinking about this and I replay bad, negative memories over and over again in my head.

Have you tried CBT to overcome your fears? 

Let yourself fail, let yourself make mistakes. Your job experience is in a different environment, that doesn't mean you are an expert in a new environment. What's the worst that can happen? You get fired? You change field to a different job industry? Failing is not the end of the world. And it is normal to be nervous, don't hit yourself just because you are nervous. Courage is having the fear and doing it anyway. Is the microscope on you real or is it your paranoia?

If your boss knows you are making mistakes, that might be bad, but if you are making mistakes and learning from it, that's a good attitude. And learning does not mean you make zero mistakes the next week. You make less mistakes over time, take 2 steps forward, 1 step back, that's still a step forward. Maybe you took 3 steps back but you will still take another step the next day cos you're resilient. Give yourself maybe 3 months to make mistakes ok? Give yourself grace, its ok. Your mind is a container, you can't put in positive thoughts if you don't change the negative memories first. Work on getting over your past? 

Are you sleeping less cos of your anxiety? I suffer that too, it does take a toll on me. The negative thoughts towards myself are endless and I can't stop them unless I focus on my daughter. I guess I have a family outside my job that helps distracts my poor performance in my job. I hope your therapist is helping you overcome this. I feel your pain 😞 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 2/27/2021 at 5:36 PM, I need a hero said:

I always tell everyone I’m about to retire lol.

I'm certainly looking forward to that day (if it ever comes while I'm still sentient). In the US corporate world, at least, it's quite miserable for so many. Just a few of my favorites:

  • Rampant and unapologetic ageism -- for some reason, this tends to get omitted from the recent diversity/inclusion/belonging theme.
  • Backstabbing coworkers -- everybody out for their own promotions and bonuses. Self-interest is the only interest.
  • Culture of personality -- your (lack of) technical competence doesn't matter if you can convince your colleagues and higher-ups of your greatness.
  • Constant fear of downsizing -- the wonders of at-will employment in a capitalistic society.
  • People you can't stand -- no matter how personable and reasonable you are, human nature will find a way to get your goat.
  • ...

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...