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Coincidences or signs?


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I am writing a list of coincidences that I suspected that they were a negative sign from God. My ocd fear has to do with making promises and asking punishment from God.

1) I was in my bed, 2 years ago. I asked from God a specific sign to happen, if in case, lets say, my ocd is right. I asked something like if my ocd is right, to hear a door opening/closing in the building that I used to live, then. The sound in order to be considered as a sign, should be heard til 5 seconds pass, since I ask it. If the sound happens after 6 or more seconds, it wont be considered as a sign. I asked for that sign and even though, I changed my opion about it due to a possible coincidence, I heard someone unlocking his/her door apartment. it was before the 5-second rule. Since, then, I would find myself between sleep and awake, and I would have the very first thought of the day. Randomly, with my eyes still closed from sleep, I was having random thoughts like " door sound, i will hear a door" etc. And after some 5-10 seconds, I would hear a door. That happened more than 5 times, I guess. It was as if my mind was predicting that i will hear a door. It was not a dream. I suppose, my subconscious was scared by the door coincidence, and in my sleep, I would hear sounds that are similar to door. For example, even calling the elevator would sound as a heavy door closing. If someone unlocks his/her door aparment and then, closes the door, I would hear it in my sleep and get the random thought "door sound, door sound" then, I would hear the man/woman calling the elevator which sounds like a door closing with force, so, I guess that created the misunderstanding that I was predicting a door sound, every morning.

2) I was praying and had my eyes closed. In the blackness, I was thinking about my ocd fear and that, created an image. That image was a japanese monster that I watched, randomly, on internet days ago. I opened my eyes, and started looking random stuff in facebook. After 5-10 minutes, I saw an article about that monster that it popped in my mind while I was praying. it was the first time, that I saw it on facebook.

3) I was watching a video. the guy was talking about a symbol. I heard him saying the word sign, but was not sure. I decided to close the video because my mind started thinking stuff like " I will hear it again and it will be a bad, scary coincidence, i better close it" I wa ready to close the site but my new thoughts stopped me. I was thinking " what if when i close the video, I will hear the guy saying the word "sign" as the last word before closing the video? that would be scary" I just wanted to close the video because I did not want to hear the word "sign" and when I tried to close it, i stopped because I feared that I would hear the word "sign" as the last word before closing it. So, I waited some seconds in order for the guy to somehow, change the subject and when I felt that it was the right moment to close it, I closed it, very fast, and uninentionally, without knowing that he will say the word "sign" I closed it with him saying the word "sign" as the last word. It was so unlikely to happen. The guy was speaking fast. If I had closed the video 1 second earlier, I would never have heard it. But I was so unlucky that I closed it randomly, when he was saying the word "sign" I know he said that word because I op How my mind predicted that I would hear the word "sign" as the last word before closing the video? I checked it and the guy indeed was saying the word "sign" and I am worried because if I have closed the video 1 second earlier or later, this scary coincidence would never happen. how you explain that?

4) A coincidence happened in youtube, with a video game character from Mortal Kombat, known as Scorpion. He transformed to a scorpion and i do not remember, exactly but that generated a random thought like " I guess, Scorpion will give me some worries about my whole ocd-coincidence case" I was playing Mortal Kombat 4 after a very long time, and the first opponent was Scorpion. I lost the match, and it the moment that Scorpion was to give me the finishing strike. I got a random thought like " i hope he wont transform to a scorpion" and he did! first match and he transformed to a scorpion. i was playing against the computer. there are many other moves that could computer use in order to finish me, and the computer choose to transform to a scorpion. that is not so common when playing against a computer. I fought him again and lost again. I was thinking " I hope he does not transform to a scorpion 2 times in a row because that would be very rare" and yes, he transformed to a scorpion again. 2 times in a row! I was watching a youtube video with a collection of all mortal kombat finishing moves. It was about 1 or 2 hours. I randomly, clicked the timeline in a random second. It was the second that the Scorpion character was transforming to a scorpion! That was about 7 seconds. So, from all 60-120 minutes of the video, I randomly, clicked on the 7-second scene of scorpion?

5) My ocd fear is about asking punishment from God so i was thinking about a similar example. I was thinking that if someone would have asked from God to lose his arm in an accident, that would never happen. that calmed me down but 1 minute later, I saw someone in the street with one arm only. was that a sign from God to tell me that I should be afraid of what my ocd says?

6) I ended up having random sound coincidences with other daily sounds, similar to the door sound. Like car alarms and dog barking. I would be thinking about my ocd and then, I would have random thoughts like " i hope i wont hear a door or a dog or a car alarm" and yes, i would hear one of these things. many times. I would be writing about the door coincidence in the internet and I would get a random thought like "I hope i wont hear a door sound, now tha i am writing the word "door" because that would be a scary" and yes, i was hearing a door sound.

7) I was having a scary thought for many days. i was thinking "what if one day, I hear these 3 sounds (dog,alarm,door) together? that would be super scary" One day, i was thinking about my ocd and randomly, a dog barked. I thought " just a dog, i would be scared only if it was the 3 sounds together" the dog kept barking for a minute and suddenly, I hear a car alarm ringing the same time with the elevator sound. The elevator sound, sounds like a heavy door closing so, it can be considered as the 3 sounds happening together. I was in a different neighborhood, and I heard a car alarm the same time with a door opening/closing in the building. i remembered the 3-sound coincidence and I was like " the only thing we miss now is a dog" and a dog started barking.

😎 I was writing many times, on internet, about these coincidences. One afternoon, a friend that knows nothing of my problem, send me a spam message. he wanted to complain that I always cancel when we arrange something. the message was like

" Coincidences are good but is it a coincidence that I agree? everytime we arrange to go out, you cancel it, is that a coincidence"

I freaked! why he randomly, used the word "coincidence"

9) An internet user, suggested me 3 books related to my ocd problem, somehow. I was not interested in these books and as I was ready to close the site, i got a thought like "what if there is a sign hidden in these books? choose one of them" I randomly, searched one of the three books, for its summary in wikipedia. The ending was almost, 80% my ocd fear and the summary was using words-phrases that I used to describe my ocd fear. was that a coincidence? my mind predicted that I would find something there and then, indeed I found something related to my ocd fear so much?

10) A friend of mine was speaking about the thiefs that steal wallets from random people. I was thinking about my ocd fear and got a random thought like " Perhaps, we are cursed from God" and at that moment, I hear my friend saying " the thief curses when he steals a wallet that it is empty due to the economy crisis" was that a coincidence?

11) I read the word "curse" on internet and I hear from the tv, which was playing a scooby-doo episode, saying something like " he was cursed" i freaked and the tv kept saying " his worst nightmare came true"

12) I entered the room in which the tv was open. It was a show about mythology. The narrator was saying a story. When I walked in the room, I heard the narrator saying " She cursed herself and the sea and asked from God to be transformed to stone and God granted her wish" That was my ocd fear! asking a punishment from God. I was writing about that coincidence on the internet and as I was thinking to write " Was that a coincidence or not" I hear my grandma saying to my father something like '' these are signs" was that a coincidence again?

13) I was staying in an airbnb apartment. I was looking the bookcase that had a few books. after some time, I looked it again, and had a book with the title "THE SIGN OF GOD" i did not freak because it was a time that I started ignoring my ocd and was thinking less about the whole coincidence-thing. But still, why i did not saw that book when I checked for the first time?

can someone explain to me, what he/she thinks of these coincidences one by one. These coincidences are the reason that I cant just ignore my ocd that easily. Because coincidences happen that perhaps, tell me that my ocd is right and I should worry about it.

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I understand how intrusive and convincing these thoughts must be. It must be a very painful situation. 
The good news is that ocd is a treatable disease. Are you seeing a doctor or therapist about your ocd?
 

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