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I don’t know what to do


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My father has been a horrible to me since we lost my mum, we dropped everything to support him and ended up paying two rents because we moved near him so he wasn’t alone, within weeks he found someone else but that was down to him, I traveled 9 hours on a Train to see him last Christmas and he stood me up for dinner and later on Facebook he said it was because we went to a hotel for x rated fun with his new gf. So I barely got to see him, I was stuck in somewhere strange I never been and then more recently he said to the court that mums car and all her possession were left to me, I believe he said this to avoid the debt collectors taking all of the things and he put me at risk of being done for fraud (his fraud) which I had nothing to do with and I am so livid, the debt collectors are harassing me now. What gets to me when he found out that I was gay he stopped caring, it’s like when I fell in the car park and injured myself he didn’t ask if I was ok or offer to help so I’ve had enough,  and I’m considering taking legal action against him because he admitted in writing that all of mums things were left to me, yet he sold 1000’s worth of her things and pocketed the money. He has her car, table, god knows what else so I could take him to court but I don’t know what to do. It’s not about the money, it’s principle that he has tested me like dirt time and time again, he never says sorry or never says he did anything wrong and he just keeps on causing me stress, upset and it’s impacting my recover and has set me back at-least a year and he doesn’t care at all. He lies. I don’t think mum would have wanted me to sue dad but on the other hand she wouldn’t have wanted him to treat me this badly either. Ever since he lied to the court he hasn’t rung or text or said a thing.

I don’t know why I deserved all of this other than him taking offence when I came out as gay. I’ve had enough 

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I’m so sorry for your loss. I’m also so sorry to hear how things have gone with your father. I think it is important that people are held legally accountable for their actions. If they did not want the trouble, they should not have caused it. As hard as it may be to turn someone in, it’s even harder to continue enabling them for years down the road. It is stressful, time consuming, soul consuming, hurtful and will only continue to burn you.


Just from what you have stated, it seems like he thinks he can walk all over you with no repercussions. If you continue to let him, he will, because it does not affect him. So why not is likely his mentality.


Nip this in the bud before it becomes regretful for you. He may turn against you, but he already is. So you will at least have the financial and emotional burden off of you. Maybe eventually he will have a realization and try to rebuild your relationship.

 I’m wishing you all the very best.

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  • 3 weeks later...

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