I think I deny the fact that I have depression.

[Yash Sam]

Hi there my name is yash. I'm a high school student. The covid pandemic hit my mental health pretty hard. I went from bad to worse. 

I have two friends who I trust with talking about my mental health. With covid, I couldn't meet them irl. This made it harder for me to discuss in how I was feeling.

The two months were the worst months of my entire life, I ate, slept and watched tv. I had no ambition, no motivation. I felt like a part of me just got numb to it. I believed that I was okay. That this was normal. I believed that I was not depressed that I was just in a rut or something like that. This wasnt the first time that this has happened. I've questioned many times asking myself if I was even depressed. Then I would talk myself out of it saying that I wasnt and this was temporary. It's been at least 6 months since I've felt the same. Some days are good. Some aren't.

I feel like. I cant talk to anyone I am not a very open person about my feelings. I cant Express them, even if I tried to I under Express them, pretend like I've got it under control. 

I realized the severity of it today.

The way I'd been lying to myself. Every single day. I dont know what to do. Has anyone felt this way? If so. What should i do about it. I'm lost. 

[Cent]

I heavily reccommend a therapist to those who feel they can't speak to their friends and family. It may be an intimidating process to begin but i find it to be a fantastic resource.

[SailingSoul]

Same. Ive been strong so long.