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New to group, old hand at pain/depression


Cynaminngirl

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Hi All!
I’m new to this group, but an old hand at coping with chronic pain (Fibromyalgia, Neuralgia, arthritis, and many, many surgeries in almost every part of my body) and depression. I am 64 years old, had a Cervical fusion in 2001, and the rest is history. Periodically  I fall into a bout of severe depression because I am SO TIRED of feeling like crap, and knowing I will NEVER have a day that I don’t feel like crap. Women in my family live a very long time, and frankly that sounds horrible! 
I am NOT suicidal, but if God decided to take me now I’d be happy with it. 
I have a wonderful life, but when this hits, I find no joy or happiness in it. I’m in a flat line emotionally, with the only emotion breaking through being sadness. I know how to do mindfulness, I have a wonderful support system, etc., but I’m seriously considering getting on psych meds to counteract this. I hate taking them, because then I’m REALLY in a flat line emotionally, so I was hoping talking to people that were out of my loop would help me. 
I have run support groups for Fibromyalgia, and I find my biggest joy comes from helping others! It seems to help me step back from MY pain. 
Sorry this is so long! 😁❤️❤️❤️

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Hi Cynaminngirl,

It is very nice to meet you.  I have never had to struggle with anything as bad as what you must deal with daily, so my heart goes out to you.  I think people like you are so heroic.  I hope you will find these Forums not only warm, friendly and welcoming, but also helpful.  I will be very interested in reading whatever you decide to post here.

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