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I am much more than this Depression

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Whats depression feel like?

Your lucky not to know.
Its like seeing the world through a window pane, watching from the outside looking in.
Obscurity and lurking in some shadowy place.
Its a creepy, dark, and daunting place.
Its taxing, like an investment without return.
Its when your neurons don't work.
Misfire, futility, its hard.
Your heads kicked into overdrive.
Your eyes on the prize, but you keep slipping back.
Its when nothing matters.
You keep fading, falling, finding no redemption.

Its a dead end street, a flowerbed where dreams refuse to blossom.
Its anger, its sadness, emptiness, pain.
Its relying on others to tell you what is real.
What's proper, and what is worthwhile.

Depression.. an open wound that keeps growing
Like a blight that killed the potatoes in Ireland.
Like the colonization of the natives of America.
Its sorrows cousin, the black sheep of lost love.
It's present in this mind, and it tries to convince me I am related to it.

But no...

I am not you depression, I am much more than what you take from me, I am much broader than the space in my mind you inhabit.

I am smart, funny, creative, kind
Talented, critical, lucid, deep thinking
I am musically inclined, blessed, annointed
A poet, a seer, and a worthy human being
I am all of these wonderful things.

I have tried to learn from you, tried to befriend you, I have even tried to diminish you and say you are no longer a threat. Truth be told I am endlessly determined to outgrow you, outlive you, and see you wither. And I will. I will, I will, I will.

Depression is a terrible disease, perhaps we can together make a collective diffrence in eradicating this mental virus, or... in the very least, end the stigma and blame surrounding this issue. Take care of your mind, take care of your emotions, take care of your body, and please, like my cousin says, "be good to yourself."





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While browsing I came upon this topic "I Am Much More Than This Depression".  I love it. 

What an affirmation to tell yourself everyday as you battle depression and other mental health issues.  In so many words and actions I've tried to pattern my life knowing that I'm more than just a disorder.  I'm determined to live the best life God has given me.  Through think and thin I will prevail and conquer these disorders one step at a time.  And while doing so I will enjoy life.  That doesn't mean everyday will be one without challenges and struggles.  It would be naive  of me to think so.  For me it means its not the end of my world.  If the wind blows me off course I'll just stand up and get back on the right pathway.

My life is what I make of it.  No one else is responsible for my happiness but me.


Edited by lindahurt
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