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Hey guys,

Kind of rediscovering this place (was a member over a decade ago---quite glad it's still around!). 

My story covers quite a bit of ground, so I'll keep it succinct. My battle started with what I would consider crippling anxiety roughly 20 years ago and after a melange of diagnoses and tests settled on a mixture of anti-anxiety/antidepressant meds in addition to CBT,  which helped me tremendously. After years of effective coping strategies I worked with my doc to taper down those meds and wound up as a result of circumstances supplementing with alcohol to an abusive level. That ended about five years ago and I've since embraced a fitness regime that's been tremendous in my recovery on all fronts. My current battle has been with episodes of negative thinking that I've fought with the aforementioned training (amazing what a little bit of dopamine from weight training will do) and also a bit of journaling. 

In addition of fitness I enjoy playing guitar (when I can). Glad to meet y'all and I look forward to continued health, connection and contribution here.

Best!

 

T.

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Just now, TheToddman said:

My current battle has been with episodes of negative thinking that I've fought with the aforementioned training (amazing what a little bit of dopamine from weight training will do) and also a bit of journaling. 

Welcome back Toddman,

If you can stay aware of it when thinking negatively, that can help.  I think negative thoughts or memories, replaying short scenes of embarrassment or guilt.  But, that's not constant, and I try to think it into the cornfield a lot. 

But, I've never been a negative thinker in terms of "half glass/full/empty."  Either habit is a good one to lose, and best of luck on reimagining yours.

Best, Bulgakov

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I think walking helps me more than hard training.  I would feel like superman at the gym because of the adrenaline and then crash into depression afterward and have the negative thoughts afterward that you're talking about.

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8 minutes ago, Bulgakov said:

Either habit is a good one to lose, and best of luck on reimagining yours.

Couldn't agree more. The challenge for me has been finding that 'balance' --the space that I want to call 'realism' that seems to always degrade into my own normalized version of pessimism 😄  

8 minutes ago, sober4life said:

I would feel like superman at the gym because of the adrenaline and then crash into depression afterward and have the negative thoughts afterward that you're talking about.

That's where I realize that I can easily make exercise an addition/fix and I've had to be mindful of that. Amazing the contrast between the post-workout euphoria and the end-of-day 'it is what it is' syndrome!

 

Thx!

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Hi there , hope the forum can help you. Sometimes its just good to write your thoughts down to find some relief.

I also play guitar.

Take care.

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Hi TheToddman,

Welcome back to the Forums.  It isn't easy to bear the heavy burdens of anxiety.   It can be brutal.  You have done a lot to battle it.  I think you are very heroic and you inspire me as someone else who is in this battle.  I was helped most by medication although I realize it isn't for everyone.  I will be looking forward to reading any future posts you make here. 

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