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Cassie95

I don’t know what to do.

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I’m at rock bottom right now and I was hoping to vent or get some type of good feedback at this point. I feel so very alone. I’m a mother of two. Iv been having never ending stress with my ex and I feel like it’s Just pulled too many people in. During the last election, I was pregnant, working two jobs, taking an online course and I had a 5 year old. My family is far right and he and his family are far left. I was not and still not very political but it was so hard. He was constantly trying to make me fired up and excited for trump and it made me really dislike him. He left me to hangout with his brother which turned to bars and coke. It later went to being with his cousins and doing shrooms. He even bribed me to do shrooms with him and kicked me in the pelvic area because I refused. It was a horrible relationship. I resented him for always causing such problems and wasting his money on so much things like thousands on instruments, acting classes, and then script writing equipment. I moved to my parents, and I had a great relationship with my sisters and then I did an egg retrieval surgery for my family and gave my sisters each big birthday presents. Then a few months ago my ex came to pick up my daughter and was so loud and disrespectful. My dad took his side and told him he can take her when I didn’t want my ex to take her to his cousins again. My family ended up kicking me out that day. I stayed at a hotel and then had to move back in. It’s horrible I have no where to go. And I’m depressed and feel so betrayed and suicidal. My family didn’t bother to tell me happy birthday and Mother’s Day after all iv done for them. I have been alone crying for months and I don’t have anyone . I feel just so much guilt for putting my kids through this but I can’t afford nor find a place if my own. I even did A second retrieval to get 10k. I gave myself 3 shots a day for 2 weeks and drove myself to and from an egg retrieval surgery that was an hour and a half away. I’m trying to feel better but I resent him and he just kicks me down when I’m already feeling so down. 

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Im sorry to read this, makes what im experiencing very trivial, hope you find some good people to help.  Its hard when family and friends turn their backs on you.  stay strong for the kids as they will be the ones that live with what happens.  hope you find a way to move on from your situation

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13 hours ago, Cassie95 said:

I’m at rock bottom right now and I was hoping to vent or get some type of good feedback at this point. I feel so very alone. I’m a mother of two. Iv been having never ending stress with my ex and I feel like it’s Just pulled too many people in. During the last election, I was pregnant, working two jobs, taking an online course and I had a 5 year old. My family is far right and he and his family are far left. I was not and still not very political but it was so hard. He was constantly trying to make me fired up and excited for trump and it made me really dislike him. He left me to hangout with his brother which turned to bars and coke. It later went to being with his cousins and doing shrooms. He even bribed me to do shrooms with him and kicked me in the pelvic area because I refused. It was a horrible relationship. I resented him for always causing such problems and wasting his money on so much things like thousands on instruments, acting classes, and then script writing equipment. I moved to my parents, and I had a great relationship with my sisters and then I did an egg retrieval surgery for my family and gave my sisters each big birthday presents. Then a few months ago my ex came to pick up my daughter and was so loud and disrespectful. My dad took his side and told him he can take her when I didn’t want my ex to take her to his cousins again. My family ended up kicking me out that day. I stayed at a hotel and then had to move back in. It’s horrible I have no where to go. And I’m depressed and feel so betrayed and suicidal. My family didn’t bother to tell me happy birthday and Mother’s Day after all iv done for them. I have been alone crying for months and I don’t have anyone . I feel just so much guilt for putting my kids through this but I can’t afford nor find a place if my own. I even did A second retrieval to get 10k. I gave myself 3 shots a day for 2 weeks and drove myself to and from an egg retrieval surgery that was an hour and a half away. I’m trying to feel better but I resent him and he just kicks me down when I’m already feeling so down. 

im sorry i can't imagine what you are going through because i don't have any children, but as someone else posted, try to stay strong for your kids. not sure where you live, but have you looked if they offer any services to single mothers? i know right now it's even harder because of the virus, but look into it.  but i can honestly say no one is worth is ruining your life over, especially not your ex, (he is in the past..) try to stay strong for your children, reach out to any services that might be helpful for you and your kids.

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I'm so sorry Cassie, that's so sad...

I hope you find some comfort in knowing that even though no one in your life seemingly cares, we do ❤️

Please try to hang in there and find help of any kind, if not for your sake for your kids.

 

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