sober4life Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 4 hours ago, Ratvan said: Thanks Duck, I been here but not been able to post much. I cant really put into words well enough and so tired of upsetting people because i cant articulate my feelings You've never said anything to upset me. You're always welcome here to say anything you want to say. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 On 8/2/2020 at 5:57 PM, sober4life said: I agree even the strongest people I know are cracking under the pressure of all this. I just feel like I'm hanging onto a piece of a wrecked boat in the middle of the ocean waiting for help to arrive that's never going to show up. yes many people are struggling with anxiety, insomnia, depression , all because of this virus. i hope things get better soon 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 It's always something in life though too. Like today I was trimming bushes and accidentlally tore up a bird's nest that was in the bushes and the birds were mad at me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 Low and tired Think I'll be OK in the morning though NJ 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cherryapplez2020 Posted August 4, 2020 Share Posted August 4, 2020 Did the biopsy today in pain it went well should find out next week tired and anxious 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 18 hours ago, Ratvan said: Thanks Duck, I been here but not been able to post much. I cant really put into words well enough and so tired of upsetting people because i cant articulate my feelings I am the same. I cannot put my feelings into words. 'articulate' you just taught me how to use the word 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 8 hours ago, Devlinkyla said: Did the biopsy today in pain it went well should find out next week tired and anxious I am praying all is okay. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratvan Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 18 hours ago, sober4life said: You've never said anything to upset me. You're always welcome here to say anything you want to say. See this is my issue, I did not mean anyone on here People close to me in life, I honestly feel like we don't even speak the same language anymore. I will use a wrong word and that sets off a massive argument. I'm done, going mute. But i'm working on my health, physical and mental. I finally get to have a fight soon too which I cannot wait for, sparring and bags are fun but its not the same as a match 4 hours ago, duck said: I am the same. I cannot put my feelings into words. 'articulate' you just taught me how to use the word 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 I know how you feel. There seems to be a huge difference between this place and the way people are in real life. If real life was like this place I would have a good life but in real life I'll probably leave the world by the end of the year. People help me here and make me feel better. The people in real life seem to endlessly push me closer to losing my sanity every day. They want my life to be worse any way they can make it happen. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ratvan Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 37 minutes ago, sober4life said: I know how you feel. There seems to be a huge difference between this place and the way people are in real life. If real life was like this place I would have a good life but in real life I'll probably leave the world by the end of the year. People help me here and make me feel better. The people in real life seem to endlessly push me closer to losing my sanity every day. They want my life to be worse any way they can make it happen. I know things are hard, but i'm so tired and drained of the people around me being almost constantly negative. I know I have to pull myself out of this slump but honestly I dont know why I bother if i cant get an environment where at least I can ignore most of what my head is telling me. People have said that i look a lot happier so at least my mask isn't cracking yet 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bulgakov Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 On 8/1/2020 at 4:57 PM, nojoy said: I have actual conversations with people as long as they stay 6 feet away from me and are wearing a mask. LOL. Welcome back NoJoy, I know what you mean here, it just makes me laugh to read it and have it make sense. Bulgakov 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 (edited) 2 hours ago, Ratvan said: I know things are hard, but i'm so tired and drained of the people around me being almost constantly negative. I know I have to pull myself out of this slump but honestly I dont know why I bother if i cant get an environment where at least I can ignore most of what my head is telling me. People have said that i look a lot happier so at least my mask isn't cracking yet I know normal chit chat type conversation isn't happening anymore. Any group of people talking is a debate at this point. I'm ready to retire from the world. I hope your fight goes well. Edited August 5, 2020 by sober4life 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floor2017 Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 I feel like the weight of the world is lifting off of me. Finally, something good is happening in my world. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
APFSDS Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 I'm a ****ing coward. I'm unable to be a decent human being. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 Very irritable today. I couldn't bear any creature that wasn't my cat or similar, like a friendly dog or something. Shopping and walking were stressful. I enjoyed being in nature and some feline and canine company, but the humans that I came across felt like potential bombs ready to go off at any moment.... Or maybe that was just me 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 5 hours ago, Bulgakov said: LOL. Welcome back NoJoy, I know what you mean here, it just makes me laugh to read it and have it make sense. Bulgakov 6 feet away with a mask. I'm constantly asked to repeat myself but at this point I just mumble on purpose even when I'm asked to repeat myself. I have to get some type of comedy out of it or I'll snap. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted August 5, 2020 Share Posted August 5, 2020 4 hours ago, Floor2017 said: I feel like the weight of the world is lifting off of me. Finally, something good is happening in my world. Happy for you! Happy you posted! Missed you! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Floor2017 Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 2 hours ago, duck said: Happy for you! Happy you posted! Missed you! I really appreciate it. Be prosperous my friend 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iWantRope Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 9 hours ago, Floor2017 said: I feel like the weight of the world is lifting off of me. Finally, something good is happening in my world. Someone won million dollars lottery? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atra Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 Hurt, Disappointed, Violated, Threatened & Betrayed. Also, Brave, Honest, Self-respecting, Fierce & Thankful. I ended a friendship today. They messed up with me time and again, apologizing after each time only to hurt and upset and disappoint me once more. Eventually I had enough and boundaries mean very little if I'm not prepared to enforce them. It was a difficult conversation. They cried, pleaded for one last chance and I had to sound like a broken record. To sort of fortify my resolve, I kept in my mind an affirmation I read someplace: I can't control your behavior, I can only control my exposure to it. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 On 8/4/2020 at 4:35 PM, sober4life said: It's always something in life though too. Like today I was trimming bushes and accidentlally tore up a bird's nest that was in the bushes and the birds were mad at me. it was a mistake, ..dont be too hard on yourself sober... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 7 hours ago, Atra said: Hurt, Disappointed, Violated, Threatened & Betrayed. Also, Brave, Honest, Self-respecting, Fierce & Thankful. I ended a friendship today. They messed up with me time and again, apologizing after each time only to hurt and upset and disappoint me once more. Eventually I had enough and boundaries mean very little if I'm not prepared to enforce them. It was a difficult conversation. They cried, pleaded for one last chance and I had to sound like a broken record. To sort of fortify my resolve, I kept in my mind an affirmation I read someplace: I can't control your behavior, I can only control my exposure to it. yeah i think that you can give people chances, but after a while, if they don't change it gets really boring, tiring, and you aren't true to yourself. I've had to end friendships as well, because i got tired of playing games. it's so hard to find people who are honest.. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 2 hours ago, ladysmurf said: it was a mistake, ..dont be too hard on yourself sober... It didn't make any sense where their nest was. I watched where they put their new nest right on top of trimmed bushes. They probably did the same thing last time and that's how their nest got where it was. Hey let's do the same thing again they say. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cherryapplez2020 Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 (edited) Biopsy it’s not cancer but there are same abnormalities whatever that means Edited August 6, 2020 by Devlinkyla 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted August 6, 2020 Share Posted August 6, 2020 7 minutes ago, Devlinkyla said: Biopsy it’s not cancer but there are same abnormalities whatever that means I know someone else who also heard that. Just focus on the fact that you don't have cancer. That's wonderful news! 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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