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How do You Feel Right Now? #12


Lindsay

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1 hour ago, watalife said:

Why is everyone a snake? Why is everyone fake? There must something really wrong with me to have such a bad experience with people. No one gives a dam about me that is for sure. 

No, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you.  IMHO -- There are a lot of good people in the world (like you and others on this site) and a few 'snake fakes'.  The problem is the SOBs really get around and cause pain and problems far and wide.  Sort of like if you put one drop of ink in a gallon of water, it colors all the water.  

For what little it is worth, I care about you. To h3ll with the SOBs!!   Take care of yourself!  :flowers:

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Hey hi everyone. I'm feeling down lately. Things in life taste less and less. I'm alone, isolated, well, the quarantine is ending, but I have no skills whatsoever, or, I have no energy to try to get engaged in some friendship. Why everything is so hard? I don't really want to complain, 'cause I'm healty, but relatives aren't, that affects me, and I see life with dark eyes. Life ends at some point, people suffer from sickness, what is this existence about? I don't really understand guys. It could be the lack of love that got me blind, but well, there's no well of love from where to drink, there's no specific place to find that. Why is everything so hard?

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On 6/12/2020 at 7:43 PM, sober4life said:

It's endless cleaning and throwing things away and burning things and rearranging things and spring cleaning and working on my property inside and out anything to feel like my life has some type of order to it but it won't work.  It will never work.  One day I will wake up and realize it's over.

Please pipe some of that energy over to me. I have so much that needs to be done but I can't get my @ss in gear.

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On 6/13/2020 at 9:26 PM, sober4life said:

Watching the news every day there is less hope.  

I simply don't watch it anymore. I think they want us in a constant state of fear...we are much easier to manipulate then. Most of it is pre-scripted anyway.

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7 minutes ago, JD4010 said:

Please pipe some of that energy over to me. I have so much that needs to be done but I can't get my @ss in gear.

My energy comes from Maxwell House.  Sometimes I drink so much of it to get myself going I feel like throwing up.  I have no automatic energy at all.  I'm just a lunatic on speed every time I leave the house.

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6 minutes ago, JD4010 said:

I simply don't watch it anymore. I think they want us in a constant state of fear...we are much easier to manipulate then. Most of it is pre-scripted anyway.

I'm addicted to it but it's poison.  It's not news and it's certainly not random speaking.  They are all trying to manipulate you into thinking a certain way the whole time.  It's hard not to watch for me.  It's like the neighbor's house is on fire and I say I'm not going to watch.  Usually I have no desire to watch the news but this year has been the most ridiculous year I can remember.

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There's a throbbing pain behind my eyeballs and atop my head. 

Worried, helpless: people I care about, issues i care about yet I have no real control over any of them. Will letting require less energy than trying to know everything so that I can control it?

Bothered, distant: having to scroll past raging arguments in order to find a handful of updates about friends on social media. I bring this upon myself. 

Apathetic, confident, powerless, accepting: maybe it's not my purpose to teach other people that they're making mistakes? Maybe I'm not meant to ensure that people feel consequences for every mistake or slight? Where did I get the ridiculous idea that trying to correct anyone who acts or thinks differently than I do, would make me happy? If I don't show up for every fight I'm offered, this doesnt mean I'm weak or don't care. 

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On 6/13/2020 at 8:26 PM, sober4life said:

Watching the news every day there is less hope.  

Hey Sober and JD, we have a television channel called The Frame.  It has beautiful videos of various scenes from all over the world.   I have become a huge fan.  It is better than watching the news. The soft music in the background helps me relax. 

Edited by duck
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On 6/16/2020 at 5:11 PM, sober4life said:

Days like these would have broken me in the past.  Now I just laugh.  This is all you've got god?  It's time to show you what I'm made of!  It's time to make mom proud!

That's the spirit!!!!!!

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Fearful: worried, nervous, frightened

Happy: hopeful, optimistic, curious, confident, thankful, courageous

Surprised: excited

Bad: stressed, impatient 

Two months until school begins. I've registered for classes, applied for financial aid, attended some orientation meetings. Got a fluttering in my tummy telling me it's starting to feel real. Of course I'm also worried that I'm going to find some way to blow it. 

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