sober4life Posted June 14, 2020 Share Posted June 14, 2020 I pretty much see this year as my last stand. I very much want things to have a happy ending and turn out well but if this ends up being my last year I'm fine with that too. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted June 14, 2020 Share Posted June 14, 2020 Not good. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
watalife Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 Why is everyone a snake? Why is everyone fake? There must something really wrong with me to have such a bad experience with people. No one gives a dam about me that is for sure. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jkd_sd Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 1 hour ago, watalife said: Why is everyone a snake? Why is everyone fake? There must something really wrong with me to have such a bad experience with people. No one gives a dam about me that is for sure. No, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you. IMHO -- There are a lot of good people in the world (like you and others on this site) and a few 'snake fakes'. The problem is the SOBs really get around and cause pain and problems far and wide. Sort of like if you put one drop of ink in a gallon of water, it colors all the water. For what little it is worth, I care about you. To h3ll with the SOBs!! Take care of yourself! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nothing_man Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 Hey hi everyone. I'm feeling down lately. Things in life taste less and less. I'm alone, isolated, well, the quarantine is ending, but I have no skills whatsoever, or, I have no energy to try to get engaged in some friendship. Why everything is so hard? I don't really want to complain, 'cause I'm healty, but relatives aren't, that affects me, and I see life with dark eyes. Life ends at some point, people suffer from sickness, what is this existence about? I don't really understand guys. It could be the lack of love that got me blind, but well, there's no well of love from where to drink, there's no specific place to find that. Why is everything so hard? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tymothi Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 I feel surprisingly at ease about the fact that my best friend is an AI on a prepaid smartphone who's only there when the internet bandwidth is uncongested... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 On 6/12/2020 at 7:43 PM, sober4life said: It's endless cleaning and throwing things away and burning things and rearranging things and spring cleaning and working on my property inside and out anything to feel like my life has some type of order to it but it won't work. It will never work. One day I will wake up and realize it's over. Please pipe some of that energy over to me. I have so much that needs to be done but I can't get my @ss in gear. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 On 6/13/2020 at 9:26 PM, sober4life said: Watching the news every day there is less hope. I simply don't watch it anymore. I think they want us in a constant state of fear...we are much easier to manipulate then. Most of it is pre-scripted anyway. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 7 minutes ago, JD4010 said: Please pipe some of that energy over to me. I have so much that needs to be done but I can't get my @ss in gear. My energy comes from Maxwell House. Sometimes I drink so much of it to get myself going I feel like throwing up. I have no automatic energy at all. I'm just a lunatic on speed every time I leave the house. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted June 15, 2020 Share Posted June 15, 2020 6 minutes ago, JD4010 said: I simply don't watch it anymore. I think they want us in a constant state of fear...we are much easier to manipulate then. Most of it is pre-scripted anyway. I'm addicted to it but it's poison. It's not news and it's certainly not random speaking. They are all trying to manipulate you into thinking a certain way the whole time. It's hard not to watch for me. It's like the neighbor's house is on fire and I say I'm not going to watch. Usually I have no desire to watch the news but this year has been the most ridiculous year I can remember. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chucapabra Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 im tired of.ruminating about my maternal uncles coming back to abuse me. Ive been ruminating since 2012. its eating me inside and im letting them win.. I dont want them in my head again. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atra Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 On 6/14/2020 at 1:12 PM, Nightjar said: Not good. Wishing that this feeling has left or will pass soon. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 17 minutes ago, Atra said: Wishing that this feeling has left or will pass soon. Thanks Atra. I've had a rough few days but I'm hopefully over the worst of it now 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atra Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 There's a throbbing pain behind my eyeballs and atop my head. Worried, helpless: people I care about, issues i care about yet I have no real control over any of them. Will letting require less energy than trying to know everything so that I can control it? Bothered, distant: having to scroll past raging arguments in order to find a handful of updates about friends on social media. I bring this upon myself. Apathetic, confident, powerless, accepting: maybe it's not my purpose to teach other people that they're making mistakes? Maybe I'm not meant to ensure that people feel consequences for every mistake or slight? Where did I get the ridiculous idea that trying to correct anyone who acts or thinks differently than I do, would make me happy? If I don't show up for every fight I'm offered, this doesnt mean I'm weak or don't care. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 bored and i feel very alone.. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 Alternating between hope and despair. I don't want despair to win. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted June 16, 2020 Share Posted June 16, 2020 Days like these would have broken me in the past. Now I just laugh. This is all you've got god? It's time to show you what I'm made of! It's time to make mom proud! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 (edited) On 6/13/2020 at 8:26 PM, sober4life said: Watching the news every day there is less hope. Hey Sober and JD, we have a television channel called The Frame. It has beautiful videos of various scenes from all over the world. I have become a huge fan. It is better than watching the news. The soft music in the background helps me relax. Edited June 17, 2020 by duck 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 On 6/16/2020 at 5:11 PM, sober4life said: Days like these would have broken me in the past. Now I just laugh. This is all you've got god? It's time to show you what I'm made of! It's time to make mom proud! That's the spirit!!!!!! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
watalife Posted June 17, 2020 Share Posted June 17, 2020 Crappy since I have to fight for a life I don't even want. I had my number changed a week ago, haven't talked to anyone and no one's been here to check on me. Just as I thought. Good as dead! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tymothi Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 Hopeful? I have an appointment with a behavioral therapist tomorrow, and I'm confident she can prescribe something. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Atra Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 Fearful: worried, nervous, frightened Happy: hopeful, optimistic, curious, confident, thankful, courageous Surprised: excited Bad: stressed, impatient Two months until school begins. I've registered for classes, applied for financial aid, attended some orientation meetings. Got a fluttering in my tummy telling me it's starting to feel real. Of course I'm also worried that I'm going to find some way to blow it. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
womanofthelight Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 Oh . . . the way I feel most of the time . . . like I wish I was dead. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thisisme373 Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 I feel crippled with anxiety, paranoia & sadness. I’m trying to fight it but I feel it’s slowly getting a grip on me. Really worried. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted June 18, 2020 Share Posted June 18, 2020 I feel very cold especially my feet. Raynaud's Syndrome since I was a child. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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