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How do You Feel Right Now? #12


Lindsay

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On 5/28/2022 at 3:32 PM, surfcaster said:

So far so good today, didn't sleep at all, shoulder in pain but that was expected as we work on healing it, but sunny and 80 degrees with a light breeze on the bay, beach party later.

Are you going for physio?  I hope it heals soon and the pain stops.

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On 5/26/2022 at 5:19 AM, Nightjar said:

Morning duck 🙂 I'm glad you're ok..How was the storm? 😳

It was a lightening show. 😃

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I was searching for support groups for some personal issue online and feel like I got slapped by a stranger. I thought being in a support group means we can understand each other, but problem with internet is anyone can say anything they want with their face hidden. Sigh. Back to supporting myself alone then. 

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12 hours ago, duck said:

Are you going for physio?  I hope it heals soon and the pain stops.

Yes doing physical therapy 3 times a week, it's making sleeping worse but she said it would until the strength improves

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Another viewing, another disappointment 😔 The house was pretty good, it was just the traffic noise that was a bit much for me.

I'm tired. What else can I do but keep on trucking? 🤷

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7 hours ago, Depressedgurl007 said:

I was searching for support groups for some personal issue online and feel like I got slapped by a stranger. I thought being in a support group means we can understand each other, but problem with internet is anyone can say anything they want with their face hidden. Sigh. Back to supporting myself alone then. 

You're not alone. I took a look at SMART Recovery to see about at least slowing down my drinking...

All I got was hostility, snarky comments, bullying and outright abuse from the membership. Needless to say, I no longer look for help from the interweb.

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I remember the last time I drank.  I drank 46 beers and the next day never again.  What happened to make me stop?  I met someone at the store I usually got beer at and chose trying to be with that person over drinking.  I talked to the person and that person ran in half marathons.  Me being someone that never ran before in my life started training for half marathons that day.  So how did I quit?  I'm crazy and crazy won that day.

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I've not been a beer drinker since the age of 19. It was like drinking soda pop. By the time I got a buzz, I was running back and forth to the rest room emptying it out just as fast as it came in. I stick with white liquor, mixed with everything from soda, to juice to Kool-Aid. I'm now finishing off a bit more than a 5th a day of rum, vodka, anisette or gin, depending on the mood. Some days, I break out the high octane 100 proof schnapps and on those really bad pain days I resort to the 190 proof Everclear. 

While your story is inspiring, it just isn't in my future. Getting physically fit isn't something that I'm capable of, mostly because of the compression fracture in my spine, 2 herniated discs and nerve damage. Just walking the 150 ft down to the mailbox and back is trying enough. Honestly, the biggest detriment to me stopping drinking is that I have no reason to do it.

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The biggest reason we will stop drinking is because we're sick of doing it.  The person I mentioned is long gone.  For me the reason I can stay sober now is nothing helps me anymore so that's why I don't waste the money.  I think with drinking it got to a point where it didn't help and then shortly after it got to a point where it actually started making things much worse.  So I think me staying sober now is me sadly saying I've realized there are no solutions for me.

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4 hours ago, Frankensense said:

I'm now finishing off a bit more than a 5th a day of rum, vodka, anisette or gin, depending on the mood. Some days, I break out the high octane 100 proof schnapps and on those really bad pain days I resort to the 190 proof Everclear. 

I tried a bottle once, but it's like touching the tongue to a red hot stove. It's fine if diluted with water or mixed in.

I never really drank in my youth (rather long ago), but even so, it's starting to lose its effect. Everclear is the strongest possible (95%), thanks to some properties of alcohol and water. I guess once this wanes, I'll also be done with drinking. There isn't much reason for it aside from passing the time.

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19 hours ago, Depressedgurl007 said:

I was searching for support groups for some personal issue online and feel like I got slapped by a stranger. I thought being in a support group means we can understand each other, but problem with internet is anyone can say anything they want with their face hidden. Sigh. Back to supporting myself alone then. 

It happens with in person groups as well.  Some Therapists and doctors are no better. You are better off alone with your problems. 

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13 hours ago, Nightjar said:

Another viewing, another disappointment 😔 The house was pretty good, it was just the traffic noise that was a bit much for me.

I'm tired. What else can I do but keep on trucking? 🤷

So sorry to hear.  Traffic noise sucks.  I hope the next house you see is better.   HUGS. 

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Got really down and anxious yesterday. I wish I could bloody well stop it, sleep was crap. 

Anyway, battling on today. I've called about 2 houses to go and see in a lovely area. Just waiting to hear back 🤞

7 days to go till my house is officially sold. Of course, it's still not legal after 6 months, masses of negotiations and thousands of pounds spent. This is the British way 😡 but I am counting down. 

7 days....

 

 

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I'm kind of in a daze.  A friend of mine close in age passed away from the Coronavirus. 

She was fit and had received all the recommended vaccines and booster. No underlying conditions.

Quite a shock to me and her family too. 

I guess with the passage of time I had been lulled into the false belief that the Coronavirus was sort of under control, that people got sick perhaps but that deaths were not happening much anymore.  Now I have had my rude wakeup call. 

My sort of carefree life is going to change now.  I am going to be careful again, wear a mask, social distance and the whole nine yards.  Will this scourge ever end?  Yikes!

Hugs to all of you. 

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Posted (edited)

They tell us what's going on with everything.  Truth?  It's like we're in a cult and there is no truth anymore just what they say is true.  What scares me is maybe nothing changed.  They just got sick of it and they only care about money and now they say we tried and now you're on your own.  We need to make money again.  I honestly don't think it had anything to do with how we were doing health wise.  My aunt that passed away had no health issues.  None.  She was the healthiest one and she was the one that passed away from covid.  I think I had the coronavirus but I didn't think the hospital could do anything to help me so I'll never know for sure.  Whatever I had I'm just lucky I made it through it.  It could have easily taken me out but I didn't trust anyone around me to say how bad things were.

Edited by sober4life
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5 hours ago, cherryapplez2020 said:

Well my therapist canceled my appointment today I have to wait tell July to talk to her

Sorry about the cancellation……. You’re stuck with us all on here… lol

talk away, no judgement, possibly some good feedback, hugs

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2 hours ago, cherryapplez2020 said:

I feel like I need to talk to a therapist but can’t can I vent here

sure, i just say what my mind thinks all the time, i mean why not, i figure at this point you all are at least going to say what needs to be said without beating around the bush

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