sober4life Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 2 hours ago, Nightjar said: Tired. Cornered. Losing hope Don't give up. I know how you feel. I've been putting everything I have into getting the life I want lately. The stress is ******* me. I just keep thinking all the work we've put into this has to be for something. Something good has to be coming for us. I have faith in that. I'm just so sick of this life being so hard. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 3 hours ago, sober4life said: Don't give up. I know how you feel. I've been putting everything I have into getting the life I want lately. The stress is ******* me. I just keep thinking all the work we've put into this has to be for something. Something good has to be coming for us. I have faith in that. I'm just so sick of this life being so hard. I'm not giving up. I'm like you, bloody minded I do believe its all for something but sometimes it's hard It's nice that we have each other. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
monicott17 Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 Having a rough time today. Feeling really sad and lonely. Work continues to pile up and is getting more difficult to deal with each passing day. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ladysmurf Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 being hopeful is so hard, i don't want to let people down, but this illness is so painful and they just don't get it, no matter how much you explain it to them 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 1 hour ago, monicott17 said: Having a rough time today. Feeling really sad and lonely. Work continues to pile up and is getting more difficult to deal with each passing day. Sorry today is a rough one. I hope that posting here eases the loneliness a little and makes you smile 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JD4010 Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 (edited) On 4/11/2022 at 5:24 PM, anon22ae said: Trying to finish taxes. When I was poor and in school, I got refunds. When I'm poor and working, I owe. This must be taxation without representation or something. No matter what, the government will get its pound of flesh at your expense. You can rest easily knowing that your tax $$$ are financing rich people's endeavors. One of my mother's favorite sayings was "Them what has, gets." Seems to be the way the world operates. Edited April 13 by JD4010 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted April 13 Share Posted April 13 Yeah look at how long we've been paying taxes. I can't imagine what the amount is if we added it all up. We're in debt on top of it and if you look around where did all the money go? 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
iWantRope Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 10 hours ago, sober4life said: I just keep thinking all the work we've put into this has to be for something. Something good has to be coming for us. I have faith in that. I'm just so sick of this life being so hard. What's this "something good" coming for us…we gonna get paid like CEOs? 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Esselle Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 (edited) The Ultimate Irony I just finished writing and publishing a piece (for resale) on 5 ways mental health forums are ruining our mental health. Yet, here I am. Yes, indeedy. I am a hypocrite, and yet, I am also right at the same time. I wish that I was wrong. I wish that these forums were actually helpful. But the ones I have been in, have very nearly brought me to the brink of you-know-what, several times. Today, was one of the final straws that led me to write that piece. (I needed it for my portfolio - the self improvement market is huge.) So I was volunteering as a listener at a major mental health site that is named with a number, and a drinking vessel. I'm sure all of you know where it is. I was in the sharing circle and a bunch of trolls just took over - literally. I was hosting the chat, and they just smashed through every person's boundaries and shredded them. It was a virtual bloodbath and there's not a damn thing I could do about it. Successful people would say it doesn't really matter - that's just the internet, and get over it, and why am I so sensitive anyway? It's not my job, but as a volunteer there I felt, in that moment, a severe powerlessness, that I am not accustomed to feeling and a responsibility. I really did reach for the gun today. Then I changed my mind, and wrote that piece instead. I'm a hypocrite you guys. I can't take it anymore. You try, and try and try and the trolls just ...they just do what they do. They are dark triads you know. Truly machiavellian, these people. Some of them may in fact be under 18. And they will grow up into the suit and tie variety that devour "widow's houses". There's not a damn thing I, or anyone, can do to stop them. Sites like that one, and this one, talk a good game about "breaking the stigma" because it drives traffic to their site, improves their ratings. Did you really think they believe in it? They don't. Ask me - I know all about marketing and SEO. It's all designed to attract the almighty dollar. And I just wrote a piece that I will sell to them. So, even I am making money on it. The only real difference is, I really feel it. I really know what I am talking about. Most people don't and don't want to. Because if they did, they would do something about it. I'm just done. I can't go anywhere without the cyberbullies harrassing me, and everyone else who gets in their way. I can't take it anymore. I really can't. Edited April 14 by Esselle Added a clarification sentence Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 9 hours ago, iWantRope said: What's this "something good" coming for us…we gonna get paid like CEOs? That's ok, we'll keep the something good. It works for us. You keep whatever it is you've got going on. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 (edited) The house finch is sitting in her nest with a piece of grass hanging over the edge that makes it look like she's sitting there with a fishing pole. I know I need to get a life. I feel pretty good today though. Edited April 14 by sober4life 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 1 hour ago, sober4life said: The house finch is sitting in her nest with a piece of grass hanging over the edge that makes it look like she's sitting there with a fishing pole. I know I need to get a life. I feel pretty good today though. There's nothing better than living in the moment, surrounded by nature. Enjoy the spring. It only comes once a year 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 I forced myself to come into town today. And forced is the word. I was really anxious walking in. I shouldn’t leave it too long between visits for my anxiety to get going about it. I love town. And I love life. But most of the time I have to force myself to participate 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Depressedgurl007 Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 I haven’t come here in 6 months, cos I thought I wanted a break from online social platforms and online social media. Now that I’m back, I don’t feel any different or better. Life is still the same old people around me that makes my life not worth living. Sigh. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 (edited) Yeah family is there to remind me of the things I didn't do right or to remind me of the things I forgot to do. Hey I'm getting the windows fixed I say. They say yeah but what about this lock that needs to be fixed on the door. Hey I'm getting the roof fixed I say. Yeah but you're going to need a new outside building soon too. They're like the news. The news doesn't say great it's summer out there let's have fun. They try to scare us about sunscreen or say don't go into the water you might get eaten by a shark. The people in my life are there to make sure I don't enjoy life and don't feel like I succeed no matter what. Edited April 14 by sober4life 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Extremebeginner Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 19 hours ago, Esselle said: The Ultimate Irony I just finished writing and publishing a piece (for resale) on 5 ways mental health forums are ruining our mental health. Yet, here I am. Yes, indeedy. I am a hypocrite, and yet, I am also right at the same time. I wish that I was wrong. I wish that these forums were actually helpful. But the ones I have been in, have very nearly brought me to the brink of you-know-what, several times. Today, was one of the final straws that led me to write that piece. (I needed it for my portfolio - the self improvement market is huge.) So I was volunteering as a listener at a major mental health site that is named with a number, and a drinking vessel. I'm sure all of you know where it is. I was in the sharing circle and a bunch of trolls just took over - literally. I was hosting the chat, and they just smashed through every person's boundaries and shredded them. It was a virtual bloodbath and there's not a damn thing I could do about it. Successful people would say it doesn't really matter - that's just the internet, and get over it, and why am I so sensitive anyway? It's not my job, but as a volunteer there I felt, in that moment, a severe powerlessness, that I am not accustomed to feeling and a responsibility. I really did reach for the gun today. Then I changed my mind, and wrote that piece instead. I'm a hypocrite you guys. I can't take it anymore. You try, and try and try and the trolls just ...they just do what they do. They are dark triads you know. Truly machiavellian, these people. Some of them may in fact be under 18. And they will grow up into the suit and tie variety that devour "widow's houses". There's not a damn thing I, or anyone, can do to stop them. Sites like that one, and this one, talk a good game about "breaking the stigma" because it drives traffic to their site, improves their ratings. Did you really think they believe in it? They don't. Ask me - I know all about marketing and SEO. It's all designed to attract the almighty dollar. And I just wrote a piece that I will sell to them. So, even I am making money on it. The only real difference is, I really feel it. I really know what I am talking about. Most people don't and don't want to. Because if they did, they would do something about it. I'm just done. I can't go anywhere without the cyberbullies harrassing me, and everyone else who gets in their way. I can't take it anymore. I really can't. Welcome to the forum, I’m sure if you have been writing articles on forums you know all about them. This one is I believe different, its more personal, we are like a family on here. to get away from cyberbullies, you need to get away from cyber….. to accept they exist and continue to develop yourself you need to think about the good things you have done today, right now. You are welcome to vent on here, with your new friends. We will support you in what you are going through, and offer helpful guidance if possible. For now breath, you are physically safe 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Extremebeginner Posted April 14 Share Posted April 14 6 hours ago, Depressedgurl007 said: I haven’t come here in 6 months, cos I thought I wanted a break from online social platforms and online social media. Now that I’m back, I don’t feel any different or better. Life is still the same old people around me that makes my life not worth living. Sigh. Sorry to see you back with the same old crowd around you. I stay away from all platforms except df, everybody out there is only seeking your attention with dramatic content and claims. Either stay on the fun stuff, cooking, or whatever it may be for you, or just stay on df with a little Candy crush maybe. Go for a walk, take a deep breath and let us know what you’ve been up to. Hugs 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
anon22ae Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 On 4/13/2022 at 5:16 AM, sober4life said: You're talking about a place about like mine is what you want. I don't want to tell you any bad things about living in a place like this because I don't want to talk you out of it. There's bad things about every house but I believe you would love to live in a place like this. That somehow sounds inspiring... All I need is peace and quiet (and no toxic waste dump or glue factory nearby, being downstream from an old rickety dam, threatened by a muddy sloping hillside, in the middle of a dry forest due for a massive conflagration, etc.) 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 Ah, well yesterday I had some pretty strong waves of depression to contend with. Sleep was a bit weird but at least I had some. Today, I'm doing my best not to push myself too hard. I'm not dealing with things as well as I normally can. Every knock back or look from someone feels deeply personal and cuts like a knife. Rest is needed. As much as is possible. Wishing everyone a peaceful day 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 Good morning everyone and Happy Easter! I have been burnt out for the past three days. Total exhaustion. Could be my medications are too strong. Glad to see everyone posting 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 Happy Easter @duck 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 Depression is well and truly with me and has been for 5 days. All I wanna do is eat sugar and I've regained the couple of pounds I lost I guess I'm happy I managed to shower and get myself out of the house but I have this very lost, bleak feeling. Small wins though. That's what it's all about for me when I'm depressed. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cherryapplez2020 Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 4 hours ago, Dorothy Sanders said: Sorry, this feels bad, If this has happened to you, you should see a therapist and explain to him everything that has happened, including how you feel and what is going on in your thoughts. If you live in the United States, you should give RoyalVibe Health a try. It is a therapeutic center where people with depression and anxiety are treated. And I feel that you will be fine soon. I just got a new therapist thank you I will definitely look that up am actually doing a lot better 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 On 4/14/2022 at 9:57 AM, Nightjar said: There's nothing better than living in the moment, surrounded by nature. Enjoy the spring. It only comes once a year I have house finches on both sides of the house. I saw the one on the other side of the house fly backwards to the ledge in front of the nest and moonwalk into the nest. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted April 15 Share Posted April 15 5 minutes ago, sober4life said: I have house finches on both sides of the house. I saw the one on the other side of the house fly backwards to the ledge in front of the nest and moonwalk into the nest. Crikey, that bird must be worth a fortune 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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