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How do You Feel Right Now? #12


Lindsay

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Still tired. I did however sleep last night, surprisingly, since I was half-asleep all day previously. But I took my anxiety and sleep pills so they were just doing their job.

The pill I take in the morning/afternoon to keep me up is sort of doing its job. I'm awake if I take it but my brain is still sleeping half the time. Hence the brain fog. I did skip the coffee the other day, hoping it will help. It maybe helped a little but I don't know. In the meanwhile, I'm trying to drink more water like everyone has recommended. I haven't been measuring, but I doubt I'm at my goal of half a gallon a day.

I think it's just this time of year. I don't like the spring; it makes me anxious, less likely to go out due to rain/heat/t-storms, and I exercise less (that one is a moot point since I haven't really been exercising this year at all). I just feel totally drained and I can't help but blame the time of year for it. The problem is I hate summer too, even more, so I don't have any expectations to feel better until September. And that really sucks. 

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9 hours ago, oscarnappy76 said:

How do I feel right now?  at this moment, very sad, as my cat that I had for 14 years died on Sunday.  I did some research and it looks like that the steroid which literally kept him alive for I guess the last 6 years, may have also worn away his muscles which led to his constant falling and his eventual passing.  I guess.

Makes me feel less guilty, as i feared the steroids killed his heart, but it didnt.  I guess i did the best i could, as i listened to the doctors and constantly sought updated advice as how to help him best.  i asked soo many questions, and did what they said.  drove hundreds of miles trying to find his special food.

 

i miss him a ton, sometimes i feel like im dieing on the inside, but each day is a little better.

hopefully by this weekend ill feel almost normal.  we will see.  trying hard to NOT look at photos of him.

I'm so sorry, he had a good life at your side. I'm sure he was always grateful.

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2 minutes ago, Nightjar said:

Today has been crap so far. I wanted to chill but there are people in and out here 24/7. No peace 🙄 

Maybe go to the beach again for some peace and quiet.  You're like me I think you need a break from things.  I'm going to go see the cows.  It's been making cry lately because the cows have been including the donkey that lost her partner just like she's one of them.  I saw the donkey treating one of the cows like she was her baby yesterday and the cows seem to let her babysit like that sometimes.❤️

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21 minutes ago, sober4life said:

Maybe go to the beach again for some peace and quiet.  You're like me I think you need a break from things.  I'm going to go see the cows.  It's been making cry lately because the cows have been including the donkey that lost her partner just like she's one of them.  I saw the donkey treating one of the cows like she was her baby yesterday and the cows seem to let her babysit like that sometimes.❤️

Ah, its nice to hear about the animals. I saw a beautiful donkey when I was driving in the countryside the other day. It made me smile. I probably won't drive to the beach today. It's a 40 minute drive and I'm tired (what's new?) but I am thinking that I will pop out for a local walk for a break 🤔

Have a nice time today with the animals 😊

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I hope today gets better.  Found my car windshield is cracked.  Went to take it to the glass shop and my car battery is dead.  Let's see how the rest of the day goes from here . . .  Well, could be worse.

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Same. Still tired, still brain foggy.

Was woken up by some pretty scarily loud rain and thunder. There was a tornado watch in some places, but now it's calmed down. I still have to take the dog out and she's going to fight me tooth and nail because this weather scares the crap out of her.

Two days without caffeine and I can't say I feel much of a difference. I'll probably go back to coffee tomorrow. 

I just wish I had something to look forward to/ be excited about. Even something as simple as a new TV show to watch. Something to keep my days from total boredom and wanting to sleep all day. 

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10 minutes ago, evalynn said:

I just wish I had something to look forward to/ be excited about. Even something as simple as a new TV show to watch.

Ditto. I may investigate the new TV show. We have some good dramas in the uk and I haven't bothered even looking for ages 🤔

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1 hour ago, Epictetus said:

I hope today gets better.  Found my car windshield is cracked.  Went to take it to the glass shop and my car battery is dead.  Let's see how the rest of the day goes from here . . .  Well, could be worse.

I don't know if you have AAA but they will bring you a new battery and Safelite will come to your house and repair your windshield wherever your car is.

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8 hours ago, Epictetus said:

I hope today gets better.  Found my car windshield is cracked.  Went to take it to the glass shop and my car battery is dead.  Let's see how the rest of the day goes from here . . .  Well, could be worse.

Hopefully you can jump it, whether with someone else's car or one of those portable power units (also good for charging cell phones and even plugging in the TV during emergencies).

They say this is as good as it gets, but they also say it could always be worse. I guess this reflects something about the world.

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On 4/6/2022 at 2:35 PM, oscarnappy76 said:

How do I feel right now?  at this moment, very sad, as my cat that I had for 14 years died on Sunday.  I did some research and it looks like that the steroid which literally kept him alive for I guess the last 6 years, may have also worn away his muscles which led to his constant falling and his eventual passing.  I guess.

Makes me feel less guilty, as i feared the steroids killed his heart, but it didnt.  I guess i did the best i could, as i listened to the doctors and constantly sought updated advice as how to help him best.  i asked soo many questions, and did what they said.  drove hundreds of miles trying to find his special food.

 

i miss him a ton, sometimes i feel like im dieing on the inside, but each day is a little better.

hopefully by this weekend ill feel almost normal.  we will see.  trying hard to NOT look at photos of him.

For me, there is nothing worse than losing a furry family member. I've lost many kitties over the decades and it never gets easier. One of my two cats is quite ill right now. She was diagnosed with inflammatory bowel disease and pancreatitis. She's on steroids and seems to be doing a little better. She's turning 15 and I worry about how much longer she will be around. She's such a little angel.

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I've got a job offer that looks pretty good. Only problem is, the place does drug testing and one of my medications is a natural substance that the benevolent government sees fit to criminalize. I'm on two pharmaceutical ADs as well...but the herbal remedy is the most effective, and probably best for my long term health.

I'd say what I really think of politicians but I'd probably have the feds kicking down my door in short order.

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When it rains it pours.  Got a new battery for my car.  They wondered whether my alternator was functioning. 

Got home around 1:00 pm.  9 pm rolls around and a  neighbor calls to say  my parking lights are on.  Oh, great.  Have an appointment to have my windshield replaced tomorrow.  Wonder if my car will even start. 

My life is pretty boring but I'd rather not have this kind of excitement.  Guess I should count my blessings. Sadly that is not the default setting of my brain. Sorry to bother you guys with such small stuff when many of you are wrestling bears.

Hugs to everyone.

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2 hours ago, JD4010 said:

I've got a job offer that looks pretty good. Only problem is, the place does drug testing and one of my medications is a natural substance that the benevolent government sees fit to criminalize. I'm on two pharmaceutical ADs as well...but the herbal remedy is the most effective, and probably best for my long term health.

I'd say what I really think of politicians but I'd probably have the feds kicking down my door in short order.

Do you have prescription documentation for them from doctor who can legally practice medicine?

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Pretty down today. I heard from my agent yesterday and there are more delays and uncertainty with the sale. Its not fallen through, but its not certain still... 4 months on... More needs to be done legally. So that's more waiting and uncertainty on the cards for me. More time staying with mom which is really stressful. 

There's also been a plot twist where narc mom is now saying that if this sale falls through she wants to buy it! Simply because she hates her apartment and it's so hard to buy anywhere. This would mean that if I would have nowhere else to stay if I didn't get a house in time other than the house I've been traumatised in. The house I'm trying to sell. 

And then if I felt compelled to rent I would see my life savings frittered way and the chance of home ownership moving further and further away. 

It all feels impossible and like entrapment. I got some sleep last night but not a great sleep. Tiredness, sometimes extreme, is a part of my life currently. I can't say no to narc mom if she wants the house and I may feel forced to start renting. She would likely cause world war three about that too. I'm doubly trapped by the fear of losing everything and by narc mom's wrath and isolation from the family. 

Edited by Nightjar
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12 hours ago, JD4010 said:

For me, there is nothing worse than losing a furry family member. I've lost many kitties over the decades and it never gets easier. One of my two cats is quite ill right now. She was diagnosed with inflammatory bowel disease and pancreatitis. She's on steroids and seems to be doing a little better. She's turning 15 and I worry about how much longer she will be around. She's such a little angel.

What food are you feeding her?  Hill's Biome worked really well for a while, making his poo much more solid.  But then he kinda stopped liking it so I switched to Royal Canin Gastrointestinal Moderate Calorie.  That also worked well and Oscar liked it.  They have wet and dry, cats obviously prefer wet and its better for their digestive system.   My cat had IBD for years and was on steroids for years, and it really seems to have extended his life.  I think he may have been 19 when he passed, so you could have at least another 4 years.   Oscar also had pancreatitis and the steroids seemed to help both.   

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6 hours ago, Nightjar said:

Pretty down today. I heard from my agent yesterday and there are more delays and uncertainty with the sale. Its not fallen through, but its not certain still... 4 months on... More needs to be done legally. So that's more waiting and uncertainty on the cards for me. More time staying with mom which is really stressful. 

There's also been a plot twist where narc mom is now saying that if this sale falls through she wants to buy it! Simply because she hates her apartment and it's so hard to buy anywhere. This would mean that if I would have nowhere else to stay if I didn't get a house in time other than the house I've been traumatised in. The house I'm trying to sell. 

And then if I felt compelled to rent I would see my life savings frittered way and the chance of home ownership moving further and further away. 

It all feels impossible and like entrapment. I got some sleep last night but not a great sleep. Tiredness, sometimes extreme, is a part of my life currently. I can't say no to narc mom if she wants the house and I may feel forced to start renting. She would likely cause world war three about that too. I'm doubly trapped by the fear of losing everything and by narc mom's wrath and isolation from the family. 

So she'll say well you liked the house before so why don't you stay there with me if I buy it or something like that I'm sure.😒

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15 hours ago, iWantRope said:

Do you have prescription documentation for them from doctor who can legally practice medicine?

Problem is, the substance is "illegal" in my brain-dead state. The city where I live has decriminalized it, but the state and feds still consider it illegal. My doc can't legally prescribe it, though it was recommended at a recent appointment.

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5 hours ago, oscarnappy76 said:

What food are you feeding her?  Hill's Biome worked really well for a while, making his poo much more solid.  But then he kinda stopped liking it so I switched to Royal Canin Gastrointestinal Moderate Calorie.  That also worked well and Oscar liked it.  They have wet and dry, cats obviously prefer wet and its better for their digestive system.   My cat had IBD for years and was on steroids for years, and it really seems to have extended his life.  I think he may have been 19 when he passed, so you could have at least another 4 years.   Oscar also had pancreatitis and the steroids seemed to help both.   

I'll check it out. Right now my kitties are eating canned Nutri-Source chicken and rice formula, supposedly gentle on the digestive system. Sometimes I wonder if the cat food companies and veterinarians are in cahoots with this stuff...the food makes kitty sick, so kitty has to visit the vet, and then vet recommends even more expensive food. Vicious cycle.

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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

Probably @JD4010Like you said before almost everything is a conspiracy.:sniffle1:

When making money is the primary motivation, everything does become suspect.

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Have been a bit panicky today. I think od'ing on sugar yesterday may have contributed to that. I did get a couple of things done which I was pleased about.. 

Fingers crossed for enough sleep to feel better tomorrow. 

G'nite folks, sleep well 😘

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18 hours ago, Epictetus said:

Sorry to bother you guys with such small stuff when many of you are wrestling bears.

No need to apologise. I appreciate hearing about everyone's day and the mutual support we give and receive. 

I hope your car gets sorted swiftly 🚗

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