Depressedgurl007 Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 3 hours ago, Nightjar said: I'm feeling overwhelmed too Have you gone back to you mil's? Is that why things have worsened? It really sucks to be at the mercy of unkind people when you have nowhere else to go.. I'm in the same boat. If I had more money then at least I could get some counselling. But then who am I kidding? I only seem to have enough energy to get the housework done and keep myself just about presentable Nope I’m at my parents place and I still feel overwhelmed. Just shows I’m the problem and not my mil causing the problem. I was Overwhelmed with work, housing, emails, people, just everything. I’m a bit better now but still afraid of what tomorrow will bring, always afraid. I hope u do get the help u need NJ. Not all counselling is helpful. Sometime we just need to be around people who say the right things to help us cope 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Rose Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 6 hours ago, duck said: Are you feeling better? want to go 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 7 hours ago, Depressedgurl007 said: Nope I’m at my parents place and I still feel overwhelmed. Just shows I’m the problem and not my mil causing the problem. I was Overwhelmed with work, housing, emails, people, just everything. I’m a bit better now but still afraid of what tomorrow will bring, always afraid. I hope u do get the help u need NJ. Not all counselling is helpful. Sometime we just need to be around people who say the right things to help us cope I'm afraid too.. People are my biggest stressor, but also what I crave the most. I long for support.. As for that.. It's been a long time coming lol. I have the feeling that when I eventually get some I won't need it any more Present company excluded. DF has been good to me 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 8 hours ago, sober4life said: For most people normal comes natural. For me strange comes natural. I think you're lovely 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juno_writes Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 17 hours ago, nothing_man said: That's okay juno. I know what you mean, I do also involve reading all kind of crap sometimes, and I'm honest to myself enough to see that I'm just trying to create "a different feeling" than feeling sad and worthless. Sometimes I seek to get angry at something. It's better than crying sometimes, idk. What I can say, try not hitting yourself for doing that, it's normal to seek for "peace of mind", even if it means to get angry, sometimes that's all the peace we can get. I know it sucks... but the mind drives that way, is the only it can do sometimes to put us away of painful thoughts. Anger - even fear - is more energizing than sadness. It can keep away the painful thoughts when we have to function, so I do see why that impulse kicks in. Just can't afford to get lost in it. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juno_writes Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 14 hours ago, Depressedgurl007 said: I’m sorry Juno about your Dad Just wanna say apart from your dad, what u wrote is almost exactly what I feel. I just want to escape, every single minute of the day when my mind starts wondering, I just want to escape from what i am forced to do (which is live) n the consequences is what u mentioned..u just put into words what’s always on my mind.. I think I should start accepting my reality sucks and just cry then maybe I won’t have the desire to escape so much.. I dunno.. It's been a while since I've been able to cry. Not sure how much is can't vs won't (who wants to focus more on feeling bad when they already feel so bad), but when I push myself to let go and feel things it feels like touching a flame and pulling back. But then I escape instead, which comes with its costs. I'm sorry that you're feeling some of that too. 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juno_writes Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 12 hours ago, Nightjar said: Why do we beat ourselves up when we are struggling the most? You don't deserve punishment juno, you deserve some reassurance - you're doing a great job Have you been getting on with betterhelp? Thank you. Beating myself up takes too much energy, so I'm trying not to do that, but also trying not to waste too much energy in other ways. A friend who went through a crisis a few years ago talked about how carefully she guarded her time and energy then. It sounded very kind to herself, actually. That's my goal, to spend it wisely as much as I can. Got a betterhelp appt tomorrow. Still feeling it out, since the first appts have some formalities. I can't keep up the cost a long time, but it's a worth a try right now. They do have income-based discounts, if that might make it more accessible for you? I think the cost is also less if you don't sign up for video calls, though I really wanted the face-to-face part at least right now. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted October 7, 2021 Share Posted October 7, 2021 2 hours ago, Nightjar said: I think you're lovely It's hard not to hate myself today. An hour and a half and 3 checks. That's how long it took for me to fill out one bill. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lindahurt Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 I feel great. My high intensity cardio workout for a couple of hours, and 35 minutes in the sauner really helps to lower my anxiety. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 I've hated my whole life so far and I can't wait for it to be over! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dusk10 Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 I feel pretty worthless this morning, it's been really hard to force myself to be productive at all lately. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 (edited) Currently spinning out from latest NM harassment. I was chilling out nicely before that. Man, I hope I can survive this time with a nerve intact If I do, I only have you guys to thank Ps. What does mean guys? Edited October 8, 2021 by Nightjar 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 8 hours ago, sober4life said: I've hated my whole life so far and I can't wait for it to be over! I have days like this too Sorry you're feeling so down today sober 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Evergreenforst4 Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 I have been super happy because I met this single mom lol I also have a 2nd date with an accountant this weekend she is pretty cool. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 (edited) 33 minutes ago, Nightjar said: Currently spinning out from latest NM harassment. I was chilling out nicely before that. Man, I hope I can survive this time with a nerve intact If I do, I only have you guys to thank Ps. What does mean guys? I know how you feel. I just got through the same thing. I need to be able to get through it without it affecting me because I don't see any way to avoid it completely. I have to figure out how to deal with it without it breaking me. I think is like when people raise both hands at a concert. Do I understand it no. Would I do it no I would feel uncomfortable around people doing it because it doesn't make sense to me. Edited October 8, 2021 by sober4life 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nightjar Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 (edited) 7 minutes ago, sober4life said: I need to be able to get through it without it affecting me I'm working on this in a kind of CBT way eg. Looking at the thoughts that I find overwhelming and trying to go through them one by one. Then, when I've identified the stressful thoughts, I try to come up with some less stressful thoughts to counteract them. It does help with the spinning G'nite folks. Edited October 8, 2021 by Nightjar 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bbqdad Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 8 hours ago, dusk10 said: I feel pretty worthless this morning, it's been really hard to force myself to be productive at all lately. I’m sorry you feel this way. Depression sucks. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juno_writes Posted October 8, 2021 Share Posted October 8, 2021 4 hours ago, Nightjar said: Currently spinning out from latest NM harassment. I was chilling out nicely before that. Man, I hope I can survive this time with a nerve intact If I do, I only have you guys to thank Ps. What does mean guys? I take as hallelujah, yay, celebration. Your CBT strategy sounds like a good way to get a little mental distance from your mom and separate her issues from yours. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
juno_writes Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 Feeling OKish after a long hard day. I'll take it. The digital detox and this morning's counseling appt helped me stay focused better on priorities. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duck Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 headaches two days in a row, no shower for three days, No energy to do chores. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crewneck Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 Not bad. For all of 2021 I felt terrible but I decided to go back on antidepressants after hitting my lowest point. So glad I did, I feel better these days. 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bulgakov Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 Just now, duck said: headaches two days in a row, no shower for three days, No energy to do chores. Hope you feel better duck. Any headache that lasts over a day gets real uncomfortable for me too. I live alone so the three-day shower rule doesn't apply here. Bulgakov 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve P Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 On 10/7/2021 at 6:16 PM, sober4life said: It's hard not to hate myself today. An hour and a half and 3 checks. That's how long it took for me to fill out one bill. I do the same thing. That's why I changed all my utility bills over to auto-pay. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellie Rose Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 i a trying to get by but i want to d** 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sober4life Posted October 9, 2021 Share Posted October 9, 2021 4 hours ago, Steve P said: I do the same thing. That's why I changed all my utility bills over to auto-pay. I did that too. This is a once a year bill. The only other option was to call and pay by credit card and the woman that answers the phone is awful. Why do you use them then? If I only talked to people I get along with I wouldn't be able to talk to anyone. I wouldn't even be able to talk to myself anymore. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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