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How do You Feel Right Now? #12


Lindsay

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For once I'm looking forward to tomorrow & I'm excited.  For a reason most people would consider stupid.  Finally, The hot water heater is getting installed.  The electrician showed up & moved the power box, the plumber will be here in the morning.  So no more heating water to bathe or wash dishes. 

And even though my older brother & I rarely see each other, he is helping me pay the bill.  Plus I got a rebate check from the health insurance so there will be heating oil this winter.

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On 9/25/2021 at 11:23 PM, watalife said:

How do people stay sane in this world. You know there's something whether it's drugs or some other bad thing.. Nobody is staying straight. They can't.  What a horrible horrible drawn out sad existence.  

The plant that shall remain nameless is what keeps me from going completely off the rails. 

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1 hour ago, Epictetus said:

This is not how I envisioned spending my life.

Same here. For some reason, I thought I could be a successful normal person at one time. Well, the truth is, I was delusional enough to think that. I sometimes daydream about an alternate me that did well without unraveling. 

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On 9/24/2021 at 8:38 PM, cherryapplez2020 said:

Not a lot know this about me but I was homeless once and I was a hot mess got lucky my grandma let me come down and stayed with her it’s very scary I hope things work out for you sorry for sounding stupid 

You do not sound stupid in the least. I appreciate the nice response. 

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Just now, JD4010 said:

The plant that shall remain nameless is what keeps me from going completely off the rails. 

One of the names it had when I recently visited a dispensary, was a variety called "Hippie Crippler."  The  growers give their product some amazing names, but Hippie Crippler is almost poetry.

Bulgakov

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43 minutes ago, JD4010 said:

The plant that shall remain nameless is what keeps me from going completely off the rails. 

I'll probably go back to it eventually.  I've pretty much forgotten how to rest at all and if I have a big day coming up the next day I'm to the point where I expect to get no sleep at all.  I'm getting too old to live that way. The thing I worry about is as long as I've been away I wonder if I could start differently.  I have no desire whatsoever to go back to where I left off.  Being able to go to a dispensary or any store where I could sneak in and get back here without any drama and I would do it in a heartbeat.

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1 hour ago, nojoy said:

For once I'm looking forward to tomorrow & I'm excited.  For a reason most people would consider stupid.  Finally, The hot water heater is getting installed.  The electrician showed up & moved the power box, the plumber will be here in the morning.  So no more heating water to bathe or wash dishes. 

And even though my older brother & I rarely see each other, he is helping me pay the bill.  Plus I got a rebate check from the health insurance so there will be heating oil this winter.

I don't consider it stupid at all.  This is the best news I've seen here in a long time.  I'm very happy to know that you will have hot water this winter.  I enjoy this place but it's very frustrating at the same time.  If I knew you in real life there is no way in hell you would go this long without hot water!

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41 minutes ago, Bulgakov said:

One of the names it had when I recently visited a dispensary, was a variety called "Hippie Crippler."  The  growers give their product some amazing names, but Hippie Crippler is almost poetry.

Bulgakov

I'm gonna look for that. Haha!

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On 9/22/2021 at 12:40 AM, duck said:

How are you doing 'bellerose' ?  Are you okay?

Things got better, but today made me feel like I can’t do anything right. I hurt the people I love the most by being honest. It’s like my heart breaks every time I hurt them. Heartbreak sucks

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7 hours ago, nojoy said:

For once I'm looking forward to tomorrow & I'm excited.  For a reason most people would consider stupid.  Finally, The hot water heater is getting installed.  The electrician showed up & moved the power box, the plumber will be here in the morning.  So no more heating water to bathe or wash dishes. 

And even though my older brother & I rarely see each other, he is helping me pay the bill.  Plus I got a rebate check from the health insurance so there will be heating oil this winter.

Glad the water is getting installed and you will have heating oil for the winter. Hugs 

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well I'm honestly at my end, I've had with this illness. after decades for struggling i can't find any relief. it's from doctor to doctor, to therapist to therapist, i see others responding to meds and therapies and me NO! i used to be more optimistic i thought something would change, i kept fighting holding on to hope..........................now it just feels like there's nothing left to fight for...days go by and i feel like there's nothing left to fight for..

i wish everyone who is dealing with this terrible illness around the world support and don't give up...

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11 hours ago, watalife said:

After watching the news, not good. I knew there was a reason I watch all those other stupid shows. Ignorance is bliss.

Much of "the news" is designed to keep us in a heightened state of fear and anxiety. I quit watching it years ago.

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9 hours ago, sober4life said:

Yeah let's have a government where we have 2 sides that fight each other for 250 years.  Let's have a government that essentially attacks itself every day.  That will be a brilliant idea!🤨

Yeah, let them duke it out with each other and leave the rest of us to live our lives. They can tax each other for the privilege too.

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On 9/29/2021 at 9:13 AM, JD4010 said:

Same here. For some reason, I thought I could be a successful normal person at one time. Well, the truth is, I was delusional enough to think that. 

Mental illness is an incurable curse for life. Do you know of any depression sufferer who gets 5-year long service awards & promotions to supervisor/management…in the history of mental health?

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17 hours ago, sober4life said:

Yeah let's have a government where we have 2 sides that fight each other for 250 years.  Let's have a government that essentially attacks itself every day.  That will be a brilliant idea!

But what would be preferable, single-party despotism/absolute monarchy?

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As of today, I've loved Jane for an entire year (although it feels like much longer). 

No words in any language can describe the way I feel about her or the way her existence warms my heart. 

I...I want to love her forever, if I can, because this is the happiest I've been in a long, long time and it's all thanks to her.

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