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How do You Feel Right Now? #12


Lindsay

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1 hour ago, duck said:

I hope you feel a bit better today Sober!  :hugs:

I'm ok today.  I was worried about the storm yesterday.  The power never went out.  We've had worse.  We'll be ok.  I have to say the road cleanup crew in Ohio is amazing.  They found their way through this nightmare pretty well actually.  I'm impressed.

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17 hours ago, Depressedgurl007 said:

I wish the same way. In the end nobody around me understands how it feels, how much I struggle everyday when I can’t see anything for the future, when I feel absolutely nothing but the emptiness and I still have to get up and keep going. I feel so alone on my worst days when I thought someone I know cares but no they don’t. I’m perfect physically but inside me I’m a wreck. 

People don't see this illness because it's not as visible as other illnesses, especially physical ones.  But if you notice others who struggle with similar issues we do, you can sometimes notice certain things in them. for example, when i used to volunteer years ago.. there was a guy who worked there and he was not much of a talker, and just kept to himself, eventually after a while we used to say hi or bye, and i realized he had similar ways of acting like I do regarding social anxiety. he acted the same exact ways I did as far as anxiety was concerned, but given he was a male and society usually tells guys to be strong and tough, he never really spoke about it, but i could tell from his body language and the way he worked, and talked to me and others, that he had tremendous social anxiety.  I would also hear people who worked with him talk about how he is not much of a talker, or outgoing or does anything when they decide to go out, etc..and they thought it was strange, but to me he was always nice , and I could tell from the way he acted , it was like looking at myself in the mirror, regarding social anxiety. I just think he was hiding it, so society does not judge him and he had to provide for his family so it's not as easy for a guy to talk about this stuff as it is for a lady..

I hope that someday soon people will be able to have some type of relief from all this..it's very tiring and annoying.

 

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36 minutes ago, Nightjar said:

I just had an offer 😳 Don't know if he's going to offer enough at the minute. In negotiations 🤔

Scary.  Around here they give you time to move out after you've sold the place.  I hope they do that there.  I can't image the stress you're under right now.   

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15 hours ago, sober4life said:

I wish I was a kid again.  Life seemed better because everyone lied to me and told me it was better but then you become an adult and pretty much every day is a day you think about and scream.  There's no going back to that mindset once you learn the truth about life.

I'm watching my daughter go through the same realization about how badly it sucks to be an adult. It breaks my heart because I see so much of myself in her. Wish she hadn't "inherited" any of that crap from me (she's adopted, but still has my pessimism).

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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

Scary.  Around here they give you time to move out after you've sold the place.  I hope they do that there.  I can't image the stress you're under right now.   

Thankyou for worrying about me. It's ok, I'll have time. It's amazing news. He increased and I accepted the offer 😁🎆🎇🎊🎉✨🎈I've been working towards this moment for three years and walked through fire to get here 🔥🔥🔥

Yes!! 

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33 minutes ago, Kogent5 said:

I just want to stop caring about everything and everyone. I'm so tired of this.

I want the same thing.  Other people seem to be able to do it.  Me I run around all day sceaming oh no what am I going to do now!

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49 minutes ago, June322 said:

I feel really anxious about work 😞 . I think all the anxiety is giving me sleep paralysis and I’m sleeping less 

Some aspect of your work in particular? Maybe its more easy to figure out what it is if you can break it into smaller pieces.... the journey, the co workers, the type of job, the location, hours, satisfaction?? Just asking to see if there are some aspects you are not worried about, or its possible is a general worry.

you are not alone feeling this way, especially this year... hoping you can fet some sleep tonight

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5 hours ago, sober4life said:

I want the same thing.  Other people seem to be able to do it.  Me I run around all day sceaming oh no what am I going to do now!

Not that it is a competition, but I got you both beat.  Not sure how this is possible, but somehow I manage to do a 'zone out' version of not caring. At the same time I panic because everything is about to fall apart.  Like I said, I do not even know how that combination is possible. 

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9 hours ago, Nightjar said:

Thankyou for worrying about me. It's ok, I'll have time. It's amazing news. He increased and I accepted the offer 😁🎆🎇🎊🎉✨🎈I've been working towards this moment for three years and walked through fire to get here 🔥🔥🔥

Yes!! 

YAY!!  That's the first half settled.  Now on to the second half of getting a new place to move to.  Good for you!

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8 hours ago, sober4life said:

I want the same thing.  Other people seem to be able to do it.  Me I run around all day sceaming oh no what am I going to do now!

Some other people do it via substances, all of which are unfortunately poisonous in the long run. If only there were a substance that was benign and produced the blissful feeling that nothing matters... there would definitely be a market for it in this world.

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Well, my quarantine is over. Going back to work tomorrow for the first time in five months. I think the good will outweigh the bad but still a little nervous as it wasn't going all that well before all this time off. Not looking forward to being around so many people again. 

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15 hours ago, ladysmurf said:

People don't see this illness because it's not as visible as other illnesses, especially physical ones.  But if you notice others who struggle with similar issues we do, you can sometimes notice certain things in them. for example, when i used to volunteer years ago.. there was a guy who worked there and he was not much of a talker, and just kept to himself, eventually after a while we used to say hi or bye, and i realized he had similar ways of acting like I do regarding social anxiety. he acted the same exact ways I did as far as anxiety was concerned, but given he was a male and society usually tells guys to be strong and tough, he never really spoke about it, but i could tell from his body language and the way he worked, and talked to me and others, that he had tremendous social anxiety.  I would also hear people who worked with him talk about how he is not much of a talker, or outgoing or does anything when they decide to go out, etc..and they thought it was strange, but to me he was always nice , and I could tell from the way he acted , it was like looking at myself in the mirror, regarding social anxiety. I just think he was hiding it, so society does not judge him and he had to provide for his family so it's not as easy for a guy to talk about this stuff as it is for a lady..

I hope that someday soon people will be able to have some type of relief from all this..it's very tiring and annoying.

 

You could have just described me. I've been called lots of things just because I don't take the initiative to interact with people much. I can function well enough with co-workers and customers in a work setting but put me in a room with the exact same people on a social setting and just can't fit in. 

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19 hours ago, Nightjar said:

I just had an offer 😳 Don't know if he's going to offer enough at the minute. In negotiations 🤔

I hope you get what you are asking for. 

Edited by duck
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I am feeling hurt because my sister abused me earlier today. I was helping her take out her garbage bags and out of the blue she started abusing me.  She does this at least four to five times a week.  I give her rides from her work to home five days a week.  I pay all the utility bills, property tax, home and auto insurance, and half the time groceries.    I need to move to a quiet place somewhere in the country.  Her abusive behaviour triggered me and I remembered how people at my last job abused me when they were in the wrong BUT this society supports and encourages bullies!

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9 minutes ago, duck said:

I am feeling hurt because my sister abused me earlier today. I was helping her take out her garbage bags and out of the blue she started abusing me.  She does this at least four to five times a week.  I give her rides from her work to home five days a week.  I pay all the utility bills, property tax, home and auto insurance, and half the time groceries.    I need to move to a quiet place somewhere in the country.  Her abusive behaviour triggered me and I remembered how people at my last job abused me when they were in the wrong BUT this society supports and encourages bullies!

I hope you get to move to the country and live away from the abuse. 

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6 hours ago, Lorax said:

You could have just described me. I've been called lots of things just because I don't take the initiative to interact with people much. I can function well enough with co-workers and customers in a work setting but put me in a room with the exact same people on a social setting and just can't fit in. 

There's nothing wrong with you , there was nothing wrong with him either. He was always nice to me , at first it was hi and bye, but after a few months as I volunteered there more and I saw things about him, the way he acted , his body language, etc, and the way he spoke and things he would say, I realized that it was very similar to mine. He was good at his job, no one made complaints about that, he just didn't like to socialize with others from the place, we can't all fit in. Personally, I don't see anything wrong with it, because I've always had a pretty small circle of people I trust and very few friends. Even in the past when I worked and went to school, it took me a while to open up to people and trust people, because people have treated me poorly in the past, so I don't trust easily. I had like 2 close friends at work, and the rest I would say Hi, bye, how are you, the typical/general stuff, (talk about weather or stuff like that) Don't be so hard on yourself, maybe the people you work with are not the right ones for you to associate with.

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