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How do You Feel Right Now? #12


Lindsay

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@iWantRopeIve tried twice already and even though i have 4 mental and physical conditions i dont qualify. My neighbor upstairs has 2 boyfriends, stays gone all day and night, has a garden to tend to, drives everywhere, shops everywhere, has countless friends and never worked a day in her life and gets disability. You have to be a actor to get it. 

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10 minutes ago, watalife said:

@iWantRopeIve tried twice already and even though i have 4 mental and physical conditions i dont qualify. My neighbor upstairs has 2 boyfriends, stays gone all day and night, has a garden to tend to, drives everywhere, shops everywhere, has countless friends and never worked a day in her life and gets disability. You have to be a actor to get it. 

But I'm guessing she has to live with one eye over her shoulder? 🤔

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3 hours ago, DialAForAlan said:

I'm exhausted, but at the same time, I  can't sleep cause I'm already missing Jane so much. Also, I wish more of the people I know irl understood how difficult and painful this is for me.

I know exactly how you feel.  Imagine how this goes if you saw your crush on an old show and this person passed away before you were born and there were conspiracies that this person was killed and you spend months trying to figure out how to travel through time to save this person.  You're not alone in this believe me.:hugs:

Edited by sober4life
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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

I know exactly how you feel.  Imagine how this goes if you saw your crush on an old show and this person passed away before you were born and there were conspiracies that this person was killed and you spend months trying to figure out how to travel through time to save this person.  You're not alone in this believe me.:hugs:

Still breaks my heart that Natalie Wood got snuffed. Robert Wagoner better watch his back.

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2 hours ago, JD4010 said:

Still breaks my heart that Natalie Wood got snuffed. Robert Wagoner better watch his back.

I know I feel the same way.  Every time I tell my story I leave it right where I did but it's always the same story.  People just have to know who is so amazing that they're worth spending months trying to figure out how to travel through time for. 🤷‍♀️

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I had a little blowout with my mother, who was over for a while. Thing is, it was hard to know when it turned into just a conversation (or attempt at such) because of her incessant talking. Either way, I was worn out by the time she left. 

On the other hand, I did practice good portion control not just today, but last night. So that's good.

 

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8 hours ago, JD4010 said:

Still breaks my heart that Natalie Wood got snuffed. Robert Wagoner better watch his back.

IIRC Natalie died in 1981.   He got off.  Witnesses are probably dead by now.

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13 hours ago, watalife said:

@iWantRopeIve tried twice already and even though i have 4 mental and physical conditions i dont qualify. My neighbor upstairs has 2 boyfriends, stays gone all day and night, has a garden to tend to, drives everywhere, shops everywhere, has countless friends and never worked a day in her life and gets disability. You have to be a actor to get it. 

@watalife  If you get a good doctor or therapist would it help your case?  

Edited by duck
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I enjoyed having a conversation with a woman today at the store.  We were in the air freshener section and she was trying to find the best thing to get rid of pet odors and I pointed out the best thing and I said yeah I use that all the time.  It works great!  Then she started talking about her pets and I said I've never had pets.😃

Edited by sober4life
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Sick of grief.  Sick of regret.  Don't know what to do about either.

 

Grief is not a journey.
It’s a trudge through mud

that tires the body, the mind and
spirit until exhaustion and inertia
leave you weak and heaving.

I have been advised by those who know
that grief never leaves, but transforms
into something I can live with.

I’m still waiting.

 

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I'm really trying hard not to miss Jane but I don't think it can be helped. And as pathetic as it is, I keep reaching out for her hand just to find one of my remotes or something. I know the hiatus is beyond my control but that doesn't mean it hurts any less. If anyone asks, I'm the weakest link, and not in the fun way. 

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The world sees me as a bum.  This isn't like a tv show where there's empathy and help when you're sick and can't do things.  There's none of that in real life.  I'm just a loser to them.  Life is a big race and they look where I am on the course and could care less how I got there.

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Terrible. I have to go to a horribly boring job that is nasty and depressing. Full of people who dont do there job right or professionally 🙊 theres no excitement or sense of anything but making a low wage that is just enough to pay rent and buy toilet paper. Just waiting for the end, will it be today 😌

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