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Almost unable to function


Lundi_Hvalursson

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I am not going to discuss the issue(s) that have been bothering me for the past month or so, in order to not be made fun of and/or berated. But I usually do not have depression. I have anxiety and self-esteem problems, but depression does not usually happen to me. However, I have sunk deep into probably the worst depressive state of my life, even worse than in 2016 when I got so depressed that I lost almost a third of my entire body weight.

 

I feel dejected to the point that I am having problems eating again. It does not help that I often have acid reflux and indigestion, but the depressive state also affects my appetite a lot. I lost interest in almost all of my hobbies. I can barely have a conversation nor concentrate on simple tasks because I feel hopeless. Not like it matters, since people say that I look so mean and unapproachable that many do not even want to talk to me. Instead, I feel tense and a very high heart rate, which is exacerbated by my chronic hypertension. The home blood pressure machine that I have is showing my pulse almost always over 100 at rest, plus blood pressure averaging around 155 systolic. Headaches and muscle stiffness almost all day. I cannot sleep well due to ruminations, tossing and turning and just intermittent sleep. Often I just feel like I am sick of life, despite having turned 30 a couple months ago.

 

Are these things usually temporary? Each day is a hard. How does one usually get out of these depressive states?

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I am so sorry for what you are going through.  When I am feeling anxiety, I want to snack constantly; but when depression sets in, I have no wish for food.

It is difficult to even guess how long any episode will be.  Certainly, do whatever you can to fight against the depression.  Whatever the issues are that have triggered this episode, they are important to you, and that is what counts.  Sorry I do not have any good answers.  My best wishes and hugs to you.    

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1 hour ago, Lundi_Hvalursson said:

I did not mention the issues because every time I do I get lambasted, made fun, ridiculed, etc.

For me, whether it is anxiety or depression it does not matter--both cause me to lose my appetite.

This has lasted basically since Christmas.

I think this forum should be safe on that front... or at least I would hope no one here would deliberately make you suffer more when it's already bad enough.

Those kinds of episodes hit me hard as well. They do pass eventually, but it's tough to predict when. If it's been bad since Christmas, it would normally start to lighten up a little in my case. I hope the same happens for you... other than that, I'm afraid I'm short on any real solutions, which I could definitely use as well.

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On 1/20/2020 at 4:43 AM, Lundi_Hvalursson said:

 

Hi Lundi_Hvalursson ,

So sorry you are suffering right now. I'm 57 and have had episodes as you describe at times in my life when stress are high.

My advice would be to try to be kind to yourself at this difficult time. Try not to tackle you stressors right now,  cricky, the day is hard enough already

In my experience this will pass too, I'm in a similar situation myself, so can empathise, take care.

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Hi Lundi_Hvalursson ,

So sorry you are suffering right now. I'm 57 and have had episodes as you describe at times in my life when stress are high.

My advice would be to try to be kind to yourself at this difficult time. Try not to tackle you stressors right now,  cricky, the day is hard enough already

In my experience this will pass too, I'm in a similar situation myself, so can empathise, take care.

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On 1/20/2020 at 3:44 AM, Lundi_Hvalursson said:

I did not mention the issues because every time I do I get lambasted, made fun, ridiculed, etc. 

I'm sorry people act stupid when they hear of the struggles we with mental health problems have.  I was lucky when I found DF to be the place where I can share my thoughts and feelings without being looked down. Here I found people like myself struggling to survive one day to the next.  

Are these thoughts/feelings temporary? I don't know. I have suffered from depression and anxiety since I was in my teens. I've had days/years when I was doing good and I've had  days/years where I struggle to get out of bed.

I hope you find what will help you. 

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7 hours ago, nojoy said:

I'm sorry people act stupid when they hear of the struggles we with mental health problems have.  I was lucky when I found DF to be the place where I can share my thoughts and feelings without being looked down. Here I found people like myself struggling to survive one day to the next.  

Are these thoughts/feelings temporary? I don't know. I have suffered from depression and anxiety since I was in my teens. I've had days/years when I was doing good and I've had  days/years where I struggle to get out of bed.

I hope you find what will help you. 

Alright, well, the issue is the same as usual. I have a few threads that I had opened a few months ago concerning them. They mostly deal with my having turned 30 last October still being single/virgin. It really affected me then, but lately it has caused me a lot of grief more than usual. Usually I get made fun of for this issue.

I really am not sure how to alleviate the feeling. I imagine that my status would have to change in order to stop feeling this way, but in the meantime it seems like it comes and goes bothering me a lot. However, lately this affected me probably the most it has done in my entire life. That makes it hard to function on a daily basis.

I can try not to think about it, but then I still end up thinking about it. Or even it comes to me in the form of dreams/nightmares, if I do manage to sleep a bit more than intermittently.

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Sorry you are suffering so. Your issue is understandable. Have you tried therapy? A good therapist can be very helpful I have found. Also medication could help you get through this time. You might want to talk to your doctor or see a psychiatrist. Hope things improve for you.

BW

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This situation seems so unbelievably embarrassing that I doubt that I can even tell my (female) doctor about this. I am pretty sure that she knows that I have zero relationship/sexual experience since each year I have to tell her that I am not sexually active and thus do not need to take blood tests for VD. 

Since I have had digestive motility problems in the past, I take amitriptylene each night. It is supposed to also help me sleep and be less anxious. However, I just feel like sh*t on a daily basis. 

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  • 4 months later...

You know all the issues that you are facing which is very good. It is a great start, because some people are in denial when it comes to feelings. Just work on changing the issues you are facing and reason with yourself on how you can change things. People can be inspiring but at the end of the day, it comes from you. 

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