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The Silent One

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I saw a psychiatrist for a first appointment in a long time and she diagnosed me with anorexia nervosa. She wants to start monitoring my health and weight with bloodwork because she says I've lost an unhealthy amount. 

 

I truly didnt think it had gotten this bad and I'm still partly in denial. I feel the lowest I have in years. I feel like as a 26 year old man what business do I have developing and eating disorder? How does that even happen. Things are pretty dark right now. 

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Hi Silent One,

     The brain is so mysterious.  I am often surprised by what my brain does for me and to me.  Who was it who said:  "The brain has a mind of its own."?

     If you are suffering from anorexia nervosa, that is something that is part of your life not your whole life.  You are a million times more than any affliction you may be suffering.

    Sometimes our brain leads us to do things and we get pulled in and do not see it happening. 

    It takes reflection to see what one's brain is doing.  Often it surprises or shocks us.  I know that has happened to me so many times in my life [I am 64 years old]. 

   Please do not beat yourself up for what your brain is doing.  Our brain has so many dimensions and levels from the most primitive to the most complex.

    We can only be totally responsible for what we will with all our knowledge and freedom.  But these are often blocked by so many impediments we did not choose and that we are hardly aware of. 

    No one can be reflective 24/7.  Nor is our freedom infinite.  We struggle along the best we can. 

   You are a million times more than an abstract label like "anorexic.", a label which greatly over-simplifies your depth and complexity as a human being.

    Some researchers believe that anorexia is linked to pathology in the brain in some cases.  No one chooses to have pathology.  It is something we deal with and endure rather than something that defines us.

    I hope you will feel better about yourself.  I think many famous people have been stricken with anorexia.  They did not let it define them.  If you have anorxia, I hope you will be able to rise above it and not let it define you.   You have helped so many of us here on the Forums with your posts and that includes me too.  You are a really good person!

- epictetus

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Hello @The Silent One,

Epictectus is right.  The brain is a mystery.  I have heard that some people get so busy (and having crappy food around is another incentive not to eat) that they forget to eat. 

Please take care of yourself and I hope that business is very good for you!

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16 hours ago, The Silent One said:

Even though I'm afraid of hurting my body permanently, I still struggle to eat. I just can't do it and its ridiculous. 

Are there any foods that you like, if I may ask?

I did not eat very much for a while.  School food was not very good. 

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