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para_life

So discouraged - ups and downs

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I've been on the Heritage for at 75 mg per day for about 3 weeks now.  I had a rough initial 5 days or so but then I was pretty much back to myself.  Last Saturday, I had my hair done.  After I left, all of the sudden the my symptoms came roaring back.  I felt anxious, intrusive thoughts, phobic and the crawly skin feeling.  I was so bummed.  I felt kind of crappy for the rest of the weekend but I since I was home with not a lot of stress I was okay.  This morning I had a horrible time driving to work.  When I got there, I worked but I was distracted by the symptoms.  I took my afternoon dose with a tiny bit of klonopin to keep myself from freaking out.  I am so upset.  I was stable on the Sandoz brand for so long I had forgotten how bad my ocd and anxiety could be.  I'm feeling really down.  I feel like I'll never be normal again.  It's like I never took Wellbutrin and I'm new to the medication.  Bizarre.  Does it ever get better?

 

I'm so glad I found this forum.  I have been on regular generic wellburtin 75mg 2X' per day morning and noon for about 10 years.  Prior to that time I did not take medication for my severe depression, OCD, anxiety and PTSD except for 5 years after I had my daughter when I took Paxil and a bunch of other meds for the side-effects.  I've tried just about every anti-depressant out there but the wellbutrin at a low dose really worked for me.  I also take .5 mg of klonopin at night.    The brand I have been taking of wellbutrin is Sandoz.  I have been so stable on the Sandoz wellbutrin and klonopin for so long that I thought my conditions had gone away.  I even considered going off the meds.  Boy was I wrong.

Last Friday, I was told by my pharmacy that they could not get the Sandoz wellbutrin and there was a shortage.  I called evey pharmacy, even online US pharmacies and nobody had it.  I ended up with a brand called Heritage.  I can't find many experiences related to Heritage wellbutrin online.  Anyway, I was really freaked out because I had tried a couple of other brands in the past and it did not go well.  I took the Heritage Wellbutrin at my regular dose all weekend.  I was a mess.  I was out of it, had very bad anxiety, was jittery, had horrific intrusive thoughts, body aches, nausea and I was depressed.  I was hoping that it was just my OCD working overtime.  By Monday I had to go to work and I was a mess.  I have a high level office job so I had to act "normal".  I couldn't remember things and I had the other symptoms I described.  I was so scared to drive the half hour to work my husband had to talk to me on the phone both there and back.  Thank goodness the klonopin put me to sleep when I got home.  This morning, I felt terrible.  I was thinking I was going to lose everything if I couldn't come up with a solution.  I decided to cut the Heritage in half and take half in the morning and half at lunchtime.  I swear this is a miracle.  Within 30 minutes of taking the half dose, I was doing my hair and I noticed I was thinking about other things.  I felt much calmer.  I drove to work and my husband talked to me the entire way but I was 50% better.  I did pretty well in the morning at work, could concentrate, etc.  I took the other half after lunch and finished my day.  I had to drive to my psychiatrist's office after work and I drove like normal and it didn't bother me.  I realized I was 80-90% better.  My psychiatrist and I decided I'll continue on the half doses and see how it goes.  I feel basically back to normal now.  We are thinking that my body metabolizes the Heritage differently than the Sandoz so I need a lower dose.  

I learned from this experience.  I learned that my chronic psychiatric conditions will not go away.  I also learned how important my health is.  I feel very grateful for my life because nothing much matters when you feel like you are losing your mind.  I can't believe I lived like that for many years before.

 

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Yes, I was taking the IR.  Today I hit 36 hours wellbutrin free and I felt normal again after lunch.  All of the horrific symptoms were basically gone at least for now.  I will never take this drug again.  I don't plan on taking any anti-depressant for that matter.  I am going the CTB, therapy and exercise route.  

Thank you for answering me by the way.  Much appreciated.

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