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sad in grand Rapids

Stuck in the past

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I been having trouble letting go  of the things that don't work such as getting high and drinking. i basically have quit but I've been doing once o week for last 4 weeks and mabey 8 times total since late nov. i been craving it really bad last couple of days and i dont want to do because it only leaves me feeling worse.  IT doesn't work anymore and im having a hard time accepting that.

I need to have a life and meaningful relationships and that's what i really want not drugs.  

All i think about is how much i want a romatice relationship because since i basically stoped using i can no longer run from the aching need i feel for intimacy. 

i also like this lady at work and i think she might like me but am scared to ask her out.

i am much better than my worst but being much more self aware makes feel more painful.    

In addition I'm so tired  and don't have any motivation. 

David 

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5 hours ago, sad in grand Rapids said:

I need to have a life and meaningful relationships and that's what i really want not drugs.

All i think about is how much i want a romatice relationship because since i basically stoped using i can no longer run from the aching need i feel for intimacy. 

I would like to stress that you are looking over the fence and you see that the grass is greener.  But what you don't see is all the hard work it took to make that grass so green.  Jumping over the fence in search for greener pastures is not the solution.  If you want greener pastures you need to take care of the grass under your own feet.  It takes blood sweat and tears to make a lush, green lawn.  And without the proper care, anyone's lawn can dry up and die overnight if it's not taken care of.

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i also like this lady at work and i think she might like me but am scared to ask her out.

 

Living in the past is a funny thing.  You never know when you're doing it... until tomorrow.

Don't repeat the same mistakes.  You're scared to ask her out.  But I bet there were lots of women you were scared to ask out... and now you'd say, "I should've just asked her out."

I've always been scared to death of talking to women.  So I feel ya.  But one thing that helped me make big strides was a simple little mantra:

"I've wasted the last 10 years because I was too scared.  In 10 more years, do I really want to say I wasted the last 20?"

Finding your confidence is one of the hardest things for a guy to do.  Take baby steps.  Try different things to see what works for you.  That's what I did.  And I screwed up a lot too.  But the great thing is, friends forgive your screw ups.  Strangers... well... you never see them again anyway. :)

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In addition I'm so tired  and don't have any motivation. 

Yeah... I don't think I have any good response to that.  This disease we deal with just sucks the life force out of us.  But it's like the lawn - it's an uphill battle every waking moment.  Sometimes the drudgery pays off in the end and makes it all worth it.

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