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moodyjuniper

Please Don't Do That

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When I say "Good morning. How did you sleep?" please don't respond by rattling off a list of chores. I just woke up.

When people give you loads of chocolate and sweets for a holiday, please don't leave them all over the counter and right beside the bulimic's spot at the table.

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I'm not sure what this topic is about.  I understand how you feel about the chocolate and sweets on holidays.  I love them but should never have them.  My family knows I have an extreme eating disorder and they are making me 3 cakes for my birthday.  Of course I can't say no.  My mind won't allow me to.  I'll eat them all.  It seems like a lot of the time the people around me don't get it though.  I feel like I'm speaking a different language most of the time or they aren't listening to a word I say.

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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

I'm not sure what this topic is about.  I understand how you feel about the chocolate and sweets on holidays.  I love them but should never have them.  My family knows I have an extreme eating disorder and they are making me 3 cakes for my birthday.  Of course I can't say no.  My mind won't allow me to.  I'll eat them all.  It seems like a lot of the time the people around me don't get it though.  I feel like I'm speaking a different language most of the time or they aren't listening to a word I say.

It's the anti-gratitude thread. Things I want to change or wish I could change or am trying to change or... I don't like having these critical or negative thoughts swimming around in my head, and it helps to get them out, as long as I don't dwell on them. 

I know it's tough when the people around you don't understand. I'm in the same situation. I really, really miss having control over my environment. I didn't even have a bag of sugar in my kitchen. When I'm in "recovery," I eat according to a meal plan. I have to. But I also have to be sure not to obsess about it. The same with exercise. At one point, I was exercising three hours a day, tracking all kinds of stats in a spreadsheet. I didn't need to exercise that much. I was only one thirty and toned, as well. Someone in a social group I attended once a week heard me talking about it, pulled me aside, and said, you have a problem. The next week, he and his buddy came back and dragged me to a support group. I only went because they were good-looking. LOL Whatever works, right?

Good luck with your cakes. I vomited no less than five times on Valentine's Day. Pretty high number for me. Considering the last two Valentines I've had, with the chocolate all over the house... I didn't stand a chance.

Have you tried a support group? It helps to know people who understand and gently keep you accountable.

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I haven't tried a support group.  Maybe I should.  I go on long binges with food and then eat hardly anything to get the weight back off.  I always have the idea in my mind that the people around me everyone I know will think less of me if I don't show up "perfect".  I used to be obsessed with diet and exercise.  I'm getting better with everything really.  Things were very out of control when I first got sober but little by little I started to get more emotionally stable and got better and better as time went on.  I just hate having the thoughts in my head that the whole world will judge me if I'm too fat.  My weight used to be over 300 pounds and the world treated me terribly all the time.  Then I started losing weight and the world treated me better.  I got addicted to the feeling of the world finally treating me like a human after so many years of being treated like a stray.

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10 minutes ago, LonelyHiker said:

Please don't knock on my door at 8am on a Sunday to try to sell me your superstitious nonsense. 

If it helps, get one of those "No Soliciting" signs to put on your front door. It keeps them away. At most, they'll leave whatever paper they want to give on your door knob XD

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Please don't ask me for two more hours after this. God, I'm a sucker. And please don't say I don't love you, considering I'm giving up the morning of my last day of spring break. 🌷

But really, this can't happen again. 

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23 hours ago, MaepleSyrup said:

A bite on your scalp? What? XD

Jesus dude, is everything alright??:biglaugh:

😅 A little stressed out but I'm alright thanks Mae. I wouldn't actually bite anyone on the head though the idea is somehow bizarrely amusing and exceedingly repulsive at the same time. 

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