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How do u handle having to be around a narcissist? When two people with personality disorders meet! Do you get along?


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Hey I have an interesting predicament... I have BPD but it’s mostly under control. However the parts that really still affect me are the low self worth, social anxiety and depression. 

My social anxiety has recently heightened Because someone has come into my life (no choice of my own) that I can TELL has Histrionic or narcissistic personality disorder. I am REALLY sensitive to it and it makes me REALLY anxious, uncomfortable and depressed afterwards. 

They are very attention-seeking and egocentric, to the point of ridiculousness. Most people know she’s crazy like that, but I just can’t stomach it 😭

i wish I could just accept them as is, but I can’t. It’s something that rly bothers me and makes me rly unsettled. I think it’s the unpredictable and inauthentic communication/body language and social cues that make me anxious! Also it makes me into a mean and awful person, as my hatred for them deepens. 

Its my problem, but it’s also hers. 

Have you ever met a fellow personality disorder/mental illness individual who really triggers your own one??!! Hahaha no one could possibly in my life understand this question other than here!

so please anything would be great?! Xxx  

Also how do you handle it? How do u handle having to be around a narcissist? 

Edited by Cass87
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I don't know the particulars of your situation (i.e., if you're stuck with her), but I've had to deal with a narcissistic parent and, many years later, with a similar colleague.  It probably sounds too simplistic.  I had to cut them both out of my life completely (yes, even blocked on social media).  Oh, they raised hell about it (how DARE I?)...and when I didn't react or respond, they went on to do it to someone else.

One thing I will say in the case of the ex-colleague, he made a huge fuss and I simply refused to enter into the gossip.  He ended up looking like the jerk he was...and people noticed that.  I noticed more people were then willing to come out and say it.

For someone with depression and OCD on these kinds of things, it was a huge personal victory.  I ran MY life...not the other way around.

Edited by MarkintheDark
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  • 2 weeks later...

MM, I can't think of a certain time I have ever been in this situation, but, it sounds to me like you need to get this person out of your life, it sounds like they are just bringing you down..I agree with MarkintheDark up above, his advice is excellent!! 8-]]]

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  • 8 months later...
On 1/27/2019 at 4:45 PM, Cass87 said:

Hey I have an interesting predicament... I have BPD but it’s mostly under control. However the parts that really still affect me are the low self worth, social anxiety and depression. 

My social anxiety has recently heightened Because someone has come into my life (no choice of my own) that I can TELL has Histrionic or narcissistic personality disorder. I am REALLY sensitive to it and it makes me REALLY anxious, uncomfortable and depressed afterwards. 

They are very attention-seeking and egocentric, to the point of ridiculousness. Most people know she’s crazy like that, but I just can’t stomach it 😭

i wish I could just accept them as is, but I can’t. It’s something that rly bothers me and makes me rly unsettled. I think it’s the unpredictable and inauthentic communication/body language and social cues that make me anxious! Also it makes me into a mean and awful person, as my hatred for them deepens. 

Its my problem, but it’s also hers. 

Have you ever met a fellow personality disorder/mental illness individual who really triggers your own one??!! Hahaha no one could possibly in my life understand this question other than here!

so please anything would be great?! Xxx  

Also how do you handle it? How do u handle having to be around a narcissist? 

I first want to say that I'm sorry you're going through this. (I know you posted this a while back, but I only just saw it, so I hope this will be helpful!)

Secondly, I want to assure you that you're not alone, and I definitely understand. I have had to deal with somebody like this, who was, unfortunately, not only a co-worker, but a senior co-worker. She made everyday a nightmare. I always respected that she wanted the job done well, and I did the job well ... but her aggression, sneering, weird body language and obsession about unimportant things being a certain way drove me insane. She also chose to pick on me.

Regarding advice for the predicament, (because she really triggered me!) the best thing to do is stay calm and let them have their way. (To an extent. I mean, if they want you to break the law or do something totally detrimental to you, run away!) Just be calm. Try breathing exercises. Try thought exercises. And stay away from them as much as you can.

I don't know if this helps. it won't fix the problem but I reckon it's better than nothing. Please let us know how it's going!

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