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HAP

Emptiness to core

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Depression is delitation. I was disnosed with dysthymia, severe depression, anxiety, PTSD, and anger issues. I started getting diagnosed in 2006. I've taken Lexapro, Adderall, xanax, Prozac, celexa, and just started with Klonopin, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, and Ambien. My depression has been severe for the past six months, I lay in bed and cry all weekend. Today on my home i just started crying. I took Klonopin. I didn't realize anxiety can cause crying as well. I have a very demanding job, and I just returned to school. I can't with this hollow everyday for no reason. As soon as I feel better, it pops up again. 

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Hi Hap,

I'm very sorry to hear your symptoms have been increasingly debilitating over the last six months.  Obviously, you've seen medical specialists.  Have you emphasized to them that your depression has increased to the severe level you describe?  Sometimes, we can slide along thinking we've made our situation clear, when in fact your counselor is not up to speed on our present needs, or life.  

Unfortunately depression can "pop up . .  for no reason."  Please do make a new appointment and let a professional know what you're feeling, and that you're spending more time in your room crying.  It's no way to live, and you have my sympathy.  Do come here and let us know how things progress.  I hope you find relief soon.

Bulgakov

Edited by Bulgakov
editing never ends

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I think my post was deleted. I just went back to the doctor last Friday. He's a new doctor, since I moved. He diagnosed severe depression and PTSD. Along with my previous diagnosis of dythmia and anxiety. He suggested I speak to a therapist weekly to the trauma and abuse that started in childhood and has progressed to adulthood among several other traumatic experiences. Why all of us that have just wake up one happy? Why won't my brain cooperate? I'm doing thr best I can. Just needed to vent to someone who actually understands mental illness, and not from a book. Thank you for listening. 

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Hi HAP,

    Depression can be so brutal.  I am so sorry you have been afflicted with it and that has been severe for the last six months!  That is just awful.  I hope your membership here on the Forums will be of some use to you.  These Forums have helped me a lot.  Anxiety can be cruel too, and in my sad experience anxiety and depression can feed each other in a vicious cycle.  Do you experience that too?   Are you under a lot of stress from your job and education?  - epictetus

     

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Welcome friend to our forum family.

We understand how debilitating depression cave be.

The "hollow" is part of all of us.

Obviously not all of us fall into the emptiness within.

The trick I think is to not wallow in the hollow.

We need not be lost and trapped inside of ourselves which is how I define depression.

Our goal on this forum is to not leave anyone behind in their depression cave.

Please keep posting and we will try to help.

Oscar

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Epictetus, I was disnosed with dysthmia around 17 years Its pretty much a lifelong thing. Yes my is stressful. I'm a behavior analyst working my board certification. 

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I was diagnosed with the same diseases as you wrote plus severe and constant depersonalization since I was 12 some. So I started getting diagnosed in 1992.  The depression was very severe for about last 7 months and it suddenly lifted about 2-3 weeks ago. I went 3 times to ER. The only medication I changed was dexedrine for adderall. Dexedrine works only couple of months for some people while minority gets lucky. Hap you might ask your doctor about it.

The reason I am telling you this is because you are not alone and that there is hope.

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@HAP   "I can't with this hollow everyday for no reason"

I can fully relate to you on this. I have the same experience with you for this. I'm however,  maybe not everyday, but few times a week without reason. 

I can understand how you feel, at least to some extent. 

You're not alone. 

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