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20YearsandCounting

How Do You Feel Right Now #10

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Trying to pull myself together.  I still woke up with all the physical symptoms of the anxiety - not quite as bad, but bad - that brought on disappointment...and some dread that today would be as bad as yesterday.  I'd say I'm about one-third better, so far.

I'm going to try to get myself out of the house for tasks like banking and groceries...and to see if that kinda kick starts me on other stuff.

Edited by MarkintheDark

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12 minutes ago, Rattler6 said:

Thing is I get ahead only to fall.  Name any event from history where one faction does something to get a little ahead only to be crushed later.  I read in H. John Poole's "The Phantom Soldier" that Germany almost salvaged WWI until the US got involved.  And there are a lot of others that I will not name for the sake of brevity. 

For me I got a very coveted certification last February (one I had already gotten unknowingly because of a previous job) and there is a lot of experience that I feel I lack.  I always seem to make some mistake that I feel that I should not have made. 

I get so caught up with what is going on in my head it is hard to deal with things. 

I really need to start dealing with my frustrations and fight to keep my position.  I could cut a check to pay of my vehicle and quit my job but then other expenses would mount. 

You can do anything you put your mind to and yes that means you can conquer the issues you are having on your job.  Who knows what you might be doing in a year or two on that same job if you keep the Faith that I’m more than a conqueror then the issues that come up against me.

Best of luck my friend 

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32 minutes ago, MarkintheDark said:

Trying to pull myself together.  I still woke up with all the physical symptoms of the anxiety - not quite as bad, but bad - that brought on disappointment...and some dread that today would be as bad as yesterday.  I'd say I'm about one-third better, so far.

I'm going to try to get myself out of the house for tasks like banking and groceries...and to see if that kinda kick starts me on other stuff.

I feel the same way.  I'm feeling better but still very shaky.  I have a few things I have to do later that will take a couple of hours and the story is the same tomorrow but it's things that aren't really important but have to be done so I can go at my own pace.

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4 minutes ago, sober4life said:

I feel the same way.  I'm feeling better but still very shaky.  I have a few things I have to do later that will take a couple of hours and the story is the same tomorrow but it's things that aren't really important but have to be done so I can go at my own pace.

I feel you guys and I had to make myself get up as well today to go the bank and take care of some personal things and I’m back in bed now 

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I dont feel well l. I started my day okay then some idiot ruined because i was distracted and started yelling swearing at me. some peopl3 have no class. when i see people being distracted and need to move I tell them politely. anyway i feel stupid... 

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Pissed off. Two patients asked me already: why the long face?

In a psychiatric hospital.

Why the **** are they there then?

Next time I'll put a glass cup in a sock.

Tired of such questions.

What's your tragedy?

Why the long face?

Cheer up will you?

Don't be depressed, what are you depressed about?

Edited by APFSDS

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I'm doing better.  A lot of the anxiety attacks subsided.  Not all, by any means.

Managed bank and groceries...plus a Subway sandwich as my reward.  Found a pleasant, well-reviewed local guy to work on the ailing lappy that will require a Win10 install, but preserve the Win7 data.  Also tracked down a company to try to recover the external drive data for a few hundred.

(I can see, however, a new lappy's in order, plus backup drives for my external drives)

Pointedly, though by accident, I didn't even touch Mom's apartment chaos.  My inclination would be to pop over there this evening, but I think I'd better quit while I'm ahead.  It's taking a conscious effort to remind myself it's ok NOT to drive myself into more stress.  It's ok to relax now.

I'm also convinced that the Ambien script the other night made things a lot worse.

Edited by MarkintheDark

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Just got back from a doctors appointment and it turns out I'm not crazy wearing skinny jeans to support my abdomen. I once again have a hernia in the same place as the first one. Now I wonder what my Dad is going to tell me when I tell him this. Go for workers comp again or not? I say that because I only do any lifting at work and not anywhere else.

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26 minutes ago, roadking02 said:

Just got back from a doctors appointment and it turns out I'm not crazy wearing skinny jeans to support my abdomen. I once again have a hernia in the same place as the first one. Now I wonder what my Dad is going to tell me when I tell him this. Go for workers comp again or not? I say that because I only do any lifting at work and not anywhere else.

You might as well get workers comp.  Not working is always better than working.

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I know someone that wants to buy the house so leaving this place is going to happen.  Why not?  I'm miserable here.  It can't get worse.  There are some days I'd rather be living in my tent in the woods somewhere.  Anything to get away from all of these people!

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4 hours ago, ladysmurf said:

what if there's no hope?

I have a little. It's not much but it is there. I'd share it with you if I could.

BW

Edited by BeyondWeary

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I'm fighting a cold after getting over the stomach flu. Yuck!! Finally back at work after 2 weeks off. That part was so nice. Working at one day at a time or one moment as needed.

Edited by BeyondWeary

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4 hours ago, APFSDS said:

Pissed off. Two patients asked me already: why the long face?

In a psychiatric hospital.

Why the **** are they there then?

Next time I'll put a glass cup in a sock.

Tired of such questions.

What's your tragedy?

Why the long face?

Cheer up will you?

Don't be depressed, what are you depressed about?

Same as life in the big institution known as daily existence.

If one more person asks me what I have to be depressed about, I'm gonna haul off and sock them in the nose. "Gee, suddenly I feel less depressed. Thanks!"

 

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