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20YearsandCounting

How Do You Feel Right Now #10

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3 hours ago, nothing_man said:

I miss human interaction. I moved to a new town some months ago, and am totally alone here. Is so hard for me to make friends. Weekends are being hell, having noone to talk to. I'm holding on.

Did you try the meetup app? Its not a dating site, really a site to go out and meet others locally. I joined, its free, but I haven’t gone to any events yet. Its all over canada and USA i believe

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56 minutes ago, Depressedgurl007 said:

Today is a horrible day for me. I got no energy or motivation to do anything. And I’m gonna hate myself for this. 

I feel exactly the same, and I will feel the same later. Just set yourself three little things to do. Take a shower. Eat something. Go for a short walk. Not easy but simple

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Feeling very hurt and confused. My friends came over yesterday. All if them acted like they didn't want to be there and then they left very early. I think I just need to leave my friend group and find new friends. They just don't value me anymore.

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Maybe I should mow the grass to distract my mind today.  My mind keeps telling me you have to get out of here and anyone that knows what it's like to have a self destructive brain that wants them dead knows where my brain wants to lead me today and I'm not doing it.

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Posted (edited)

Fatigued.  They're showing the place again today.  Not a biggie.  Place is clean.  It's just an annoying interruption of my otherwise peaceful weekend.  (That said, tbh, I'm just waiting for some purchaser to say the wrong thing so I can toss 'em out).

I think the problem is that the heat/humidity has taken hold.  I'm somehow holding my head above water.  But, I've felt better.

Edited by MarkintheDark

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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

Maybe I should mow the grass to distract my mind today.  My mind keeps telling me you have to get out of here and anyone that knows what it's like to have a self destructive brain that wants them dead knows where my brain wants to lead me today and I'm not doing it.

The mower blew up so now I have to go get another one quickly because this is the only day I have free.  I knew something would make me leave.

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Seem to be permamently agitated by everyone and everything including myself and my stupid existence. Still an improvement from last week. Got prescribed celexa again on a super low dose. Going to have to think about taking it I think. I really don't want to though but if it helps me function again I might not have a choice. I wish could pull myself out of this.

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Today was a very stressful awful day but it occupied my mind.  I had to focus on fixing the situation.  I never got a new mower.  I ended up having to put on a new drive belt on my mower.  You don't want to have to do that believe me but now I know how to do it and I got the yard finished so I win.  Whatever was trying to break me today you lose!

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1 hour ago, sober4life said:

Today was a very stressful awful day but it occupied my mind.  I had to focus on fixing the situation.  I never got a new mower.  I ended up having to put on a new drive belt on my mower.  You don't want to have to do that believe me but now I know how to do it and I got the yard finished so I win.  Whatever was trying to break me today you lose!

Nice! I like your attitude. Was feeling all low and moody but your post gave me energy again. We gotto fight and we can win. 

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I got to talk to my kids so that made today good they started to fight it was funny to me because I never hear them fight the way they say each eathers names oh my devlin says mom Kyla don’t know a lot about phones Kyla says oh yea devlin you don’t know a lot about my game ( I forget what it was called) me geese guys no need to fight my my I love those two

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Not that great a day - no doubt the Mother's Day anxiety "hangover," plus heat/humidity - but managed ATM, groceries, paid a couple bills.  (Come to think of it, considering my history, that was a lot). 

Otherwise, decided not to fight things.  Bright spot was Spot rushing in to have me protect him from the afternoon tstorms.  As usual, being a catdaddy has its rewards.

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21 hours ago, Nightjar said:

I'm sorry to hear this duck. I hope you can find something in your day to make you smile.

Thank you Nightjar.

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8 hours ago, sober4life said:

Today was a very stressful awful day but it occupied my mind.  I had to focus on fixing the situation.  I never got a new mower.  I ended up having to put on a new drive belt on my mower.  You don't want to have to do that believe me but now I know how to do it and I got the yard finished so I win.  Whatever was trying to break me today you lose!

That's awesome. HIGH FIVE!!!!

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I've been super busy. It really feels like this nightmare is starting to come to an end. Just another 3 weeks to go now. Still I know once these exams are over I will have new problems that i'll have to face. But I guess I'm feeling stronger. I feel like theres a light at the end of the tunnel and now at least I stand a chance at getting out. 

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