Jump to content
20YearsandCounting

How Do You Feel Right Now #10

Recommended Posts

1 hour ago, JD4010 said:

Hugely disappointed in myself. I have no motivation to work on this massive report that absolutely HAS to be done in the next day.

I used to love to get immersed in my work. Now, I simply don't care. And that makes me feel even worse.

Sorry that your job is such a pain. Wish things would turn around for you.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Angry, resentful, resigned, depressed, and a bit helpless.

Been ruminating on some stuff that happened a while back and it just keeps coming up.  I am very tired of thinking about those bad things that happened.

I am resolved to not be like those that wronged me.  

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I think the hardest thing any of us can do, is move on. Its hard to forget about the past without negative feelings. We are wited to remember the bad stuff, not the good. Rattler, use your resolve to move ahead and prove to yourself that you are a better person, having learned the hard lessons.

believe me, I hear what you are saying, and feel the same way as you do. I’m great and giving advice to others but I will reread this post a few more times for myself too.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Rattler6 said:

Been ruminating on some stuff that happened a while back and it just keeps coming up.  I am very tired of thinking about those bad things that happened.

That's some of the worst stuff for me, particularly when I can't keep it from bouncing around in my head.  Ruins my sleep, for one.

Offhand, I'm jus' thinkin', is something going on that's triggering the thoughts?  Or are they "comfortable" b/c they're familiar?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

idk.  Maybe, just maybe, the past 10 days have caught up with me (not to mention the injection of a month's worth of medications yesterday), despite some positive resolution with the landlord.  And, heck, even felt decent enough to manage a quick trip to the grocery store.

Otherwise, did a couple of good naps today, but my legs are nevertheless bothering me and the anxiety's creeping back.  I finally relented and did .5mg Xanax to calm me down tonight.  I'm not as bad as I was a couple days ago, but it feels like my body and mind have been battered around.

Maybe I'll just write off Wednesday.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Tears_Always said:

Tried emotionally it is so hard wearing the mask that the world expects to see on you especially when all you want to do is cry.

I really get what you mean.  Seems many people don't easily hear what we are going through so we have no alternative to wear a mask.  I have some friends, doctors, and counselor I can be me with, but aside from that, the mask stays on.  Be strong!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, MarkintheDark said:

idk.  Maybe, just maybe, the past 10 days have caught up with me (not to mention the injection of a month's worth of medications yesterday), despite some positive resolution with the landlord.  And, heck, even felt decent enough to manage a quick trip to the grocery store.

Otherwise, did a couple of good naps today, but my legs are nevertheless bothering me and the anxiety's creeping back.  I finally relented and did .5mg Xanax to calm me down tonight.  I'm not as bad as I was a couple days ago, but it feels like my body and mind have been battered around.

Maybe I'll just write off Wednesday.

Glad to hear there is some positive resolution with the landlord.  That and recovering from having a month's worth of medications injected in one day, I would be out of commission.  But it sounds like you are doing ok.  Probably a a good idea to take it easy Wednesday.  Take care buddy!

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Woke up in the middle of the night with a migraine. Knocked myself out with a migraine pill and seemed better this morning luckily.  I feel like a lot of us have so much going on, thoughts, worries, and etc. right now that it interferes with our sleep and daily life.  For me when things get real bad I will watch some movies on Netflx, or binge on a whole season of a tv series.  Seems to block out all the negative stuff, and just get absorbed into what I am watching.  Then maybe go outside take a walk or something.  Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)
20 hours ago, samadhiSheol said:

:console:

There could be a variety of ressons people don't respond. As you said, they might be busy.

If they are, however, indifferent or blatantly antagonistic towards you, THEY ARE NOT WORTH YOUR ATTENTION. 

Please don't be hard on yourself. You don't deserve to feel bad. But no one and I mean no one is worth ending your life for. You deserve peace of mind, happiness and a decent social network (we all do). 

We all need to feel "at home", somewhere, with someone or doing something we want to do. I guess life is about figuring all of that out. No one ever gets it completely right. No one. But little by little we can all get a certain amount of satisfaction in life. 

I hope you find happiness and peace of mind soon, @Camellia

@samadhiSheol  Thank you for comforting me. You really has helped me (feeling comfort). I really don't know what to do. If they are not my family I can just go away and never turn back. 

 

Quote

If they are, however, indifferent or blatantly antagonistic towards you, THEY ARE NOT WORTH YOUR ATTENTION. 

I will remember this advise (and your other advices). I will try not to post there anymore except to respond to their posts, because if I don't, they will say I'm the one that distance myself away from them (family). 

Quote

Please don't be hard on yourself. You don't deserve to feel bad. But no one and I mean no one is worth ending your life for.

Thank you. Tears. Tears.

Quote

 

We all need to feel "at home", somewhere, with someone or doing something we want to do. I guess life is about figuring all of that out. No one ever gets it completely right. No one. But little by little we can all get a certain amount of satisfaction in life. 

Thank you so much. "At home" . Such a comfortable word. I don't know the right word. But this really helps me as a guidance for me to keep walking. I will copy this advise to my notepad to remind me and guide me along the way. 

Quote

No one ever gets it completely right.

Thank you. Yes, I'm confused most of the time. I don't know which is right, and which is wrong. I'm tired.

Thank you so much for your advise and guidance. It gives me strength to continue walking. 

Thank you to @samadhiSheol  and everyone for all the support. You give me strength. 

I have family in here. Tears. Tears. 

 

 

 

Edited by Camellia

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

I got a C in my bio paper. That's ok though. Still have some time to try and get it up to an A. There was literally 8 marks between a C and an A. I knew the grade boundaries were close but that's scary. If I mess up on one question in the real exam that could be it for me. I'm not in a panic yet though I promise :yuck:

Edited by Soarsie18

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 hour ago, Soarsie18 said:

I got a C in my bio paper.

That hurts and wow that is a narrow range, I have no doubt that you can put it up. I also think that it is stupid that they are that close, that does not differentiate in the level of knowledge know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

yeah no it’s scary isn’t it. The papers are so hard nowadays that you only need 50% to get an A. And even then getting 50% is hard. 4 marks between a B and an A. Yet if I got a B overall university won’t accept me. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Posted (edited)

Like im ready to go off the grid as far as family and neighbors go. I should have been born an animal in a zoo or jungle that way i wouldn't need to work. Except to get food . 🦁 and no conversations  just growling and other noises

Edited by watalife

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't feel bad or good. I feel neutral.

I have been seeing a sensorimotor therapist for 2 months now. She is helping me "listen" to my body. Sometimes I will say "I'm so sad" and I'm not or "I'm so happy" and I'm not...my body and brain aren't in tune. I barely talk about my history during a session - this is not like CBT at all! She's more interested in how my body reacts when I'm talking instead of what I'm talking about.

I don't like her anywhere near as much as my old therapist, but I feel I'm making more progress with her. I've always seen my therapists as substitute friends, but I don't feel like that with her. She does things that irritate me - like yawn or look at the clock or go off on weird tangents. It's interesting having a therapist I've no strong desire to please.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
4 hours ago, Tears_Always said:

That is what we are here for if you can't say it here where can you?

Good point. But I feel guilty for complaining...after all, I'm employed while so many wish they were.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

×
×
  • Create New...