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MatthewPA

Going through chronic major depression and anxiety

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Hi,

I am new here. My name is Matt and I am 42. Since May, I have gone through major depression and a lot of anxiety. My dog died, my dad has stage 4 cancer, I have severe financial problems and I have had trouble with my bowels changing schedule and being constipated after I go in the morning. I have a colonoscopy scheduled for Wednesday and I am worried about that. Can depression cause bowel change and the stomach/midsection pressures I feel?  I only sleep for a few hours and then try helplessly for 3 more hours to get more sleep. Very hard to get out of bed. I wake up with no energy and am sleepy. Bowels bother me in the morning, so that might be part of it. But the depression seems the more likely culprit. I just don't enjoy much of anything anymore and feel hopeless. Have thought about not wanting to go on this way. I live with my parents with no job and I suspect I have some autism. That makes things harder. The only medication I have is Ativan, and I take 0.5 mg a few times a day, but it's no help with energy or feeling less depressed. It makes me even more tired and sleepy sometimes. My doctor prescribed Lexapro, but my mom would not let me have it. She is very anti anti-depressant. I am trying to get a therapist who takes insurance. I feel no way out of this and really need help.

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Hi, welcome!

I'm sorry you're going through such hard times! I too have a parent with stage 4 cancer, financial problems and trouble with digestion.

Some say that stress may cause constipation. I can only say that I've had times of great stress and have had constipation like clockwork along with it. Sometimes for up to 5-6 days long.

Hmm, ativan is a benzodiazepine used for anxiety treatment and not an anti-depressant. I had to google it, I never heard of that one.


I'd say Lexapro (escitalopram) is a very effective anti-depressant for me. I'm taking 10 mg of it and it kind of works and has worked for me in the past.

Is your doctor a psychiatrist or a general practitioner? If the former, then you should get that autism suspicion checked out if possible.

Your mother not letting you get your anti-depressant meds complicates things. There must be a way of convincing your mum to let you have those meds.

I hope other people too can contribute some suggestions on how to help you.





 

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Welcome Matthew! Sorry that you are going through so much! We are here to support you as best we can. You are not alone. Yes, depression & anxiety can cause physical problems I think. Also if one has not worked on their issues from the past, they eventually need to come out somehow even physically. Maybe try to see a psychiatrist as well as a therapist because they are doctors that know brain function and if they recommend meds, even temporarily because of your circumstances, then they know what they are talking about. I don't think your Mom should decide for you.

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I would just like to add that although I'm not anti, anti depressants, that there are risks involved with taking them.

My advice would be to educate yourself on all of the potential positives and negatives that could come from taking them.

I had a very bad reaction when withdrawing from seroxat and was hospitalised. My life was turned upside down and I had to drop out of college because I had severe depression after that which was much worse than the depression previous to taking anti depressants.

Everyone is different and will react differently to different antidepressants. There are no guarantees that they will work or that they will be safe.

They usually have side effects too which can vary greatly from person to person. 

There is a lot of information on this site on different types if you'd like to find out more.

I wouldn't dismiss your mum's concerns. I think she has a very valid point and I wish someone had stopped me.

My reputation was damaged irrevocably when I was seriously ill with the withdrawals.

Just sayin.

Edited by jeremiah

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1 hour ago, BeyondWeary said:

Welcome Matthew! Sorry that you are going through so much! We are here to support you as best we can. You are not alone. Yes, depression & anxiety can cause physical problems I think. Also if one has not worked on their issues from the past, they eventually need to come out somehow even physically. Maybe try to see a psychiatrist as well as a therapist because they are doctors that know brain function and if they recommend meds, even temporarily because of your circumstances, then they know what they are talking about. I don't think your Mom should decide for you.

Thanks for all the replies! My mom had a bad reaction to them herself and I live under her rules in her house. I have tried many times but she will not let me. 

I need some answers though because the depression is getting to the point I may even get those not wanting to live thoughts.

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1 hour ago, APFSDS said:

Hi, welcome!

I'm sorry you're going through such hard times! I too have a parent with stage 4 cancer, financial problems and trouble with digestion.

Some say that stress may cause constipation. I can only say that I've had times of great stress and have had constipation like clockwork along with it. Sometimes for up to 5-6 days long.

Hmm, ativan is a benzodiazepine used for anxiety treatment and not an anti-depressant. I had to google it, I never heard of that one.


I'd say Lexapro (escitalopram) is a very effective anti-depressant for me. I'm taking 10 mg of it and it kind of works and has worked for me in the past.

Is your doctor a psychiatrist or a general practitioner? If the former, then you should get that autism suspicion checked out if possible.

Your mother not letting you get your anti-depressant meds complicates things. There must be a way of convincing your mum to let you have those meds.

I hope other people too can contribute some suggestions on how to help you.





 

All I have is a GP right now. Really needed to have this depression addressed earlier I think. My GP will not prescribe me anything but Lexapro and Ativan. The Ativan is not good for the depression part. So really in a dilemma.

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Another thing is my system will never allow me to nap! It's the same conscious sleep I get in the morning. So I am stuck in this sleepy/no energy state throughout the day.

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Any other advice? I am happy to have found this forum. My depression and anxiety are at their absolute worst in the morning and afternoon. Need to break this pattern or I could go downhill even more.

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It's hard to stay positive when you have a lot of major things going on in your life but it can be done.  You can start by telling yourself positive things versus negative things throughout the day.  As far as your sleep and stomach problems it's likely due to stress and depression.   I really like books on living mindful and meditation to help clear the mind.  This might also help you sleep better.

 

 

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So at 42 your mother dictates whether you can or cant take a medication your Dr. Prescribes? Is your relationship with her causing some of your problems? It doesn't sound healthy to me.

Shes really going to kick you out if you start taking some medicine that could help you? Thats pretty messed up. We all go through several drugs to find one that works. Some have side effects we cant handle, so you have to try something else. Its part of the deal. 

If you're still treated like a 5 year old, theres your problem.

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2 hours ago, Steveab63 said:

So at 42 your mother dictates whether you can or cant take a medication your Dr. Prescribes? Is your relationship with her causing some of your problems? It doesn't sound healthy to me.

Shes really going to kick you out if you start taking some medicine that could help you? Thats pretty messed up. We all go through several drugs to find one that works. Some have side effects we cant handle, so you have to try something else. Its part of the deal. 

If you're still treated like a 5 year old, theres your problem.

Yeah it is a problem. But she is a control freak that way. Unfortunately I do not take care of myself well at all even though I am 42. Sometimes I feel mentally like a child, and that makes things rougher. I don't handle things well.

Edited by MatthewPA

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I always wake up in a panic and today I couldn't hold it in. Parents got mad at me and told me to get a hold of myself. I always can't sleep well so when the late morning comes I get bad anxiety wondering how I will get through the day. Then my bowel schedule reminds me of my hypochondria. I am always worried I have something else bad. Hopefully the colonoscopy will put me at ease. If I am in the shape to get it. Been in very bad shape.

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I'm sorry to hear that you are having so many physical problems right now,

I hope that your test results come back good and that you can eventually

get some comfort from your depression and other problems you are having.

Hang in there my friend and keep us posted how your results turn out. I'm

praying that your physical body can get some relief from your pains and

discomfort  

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2 hours ago, Floor2017 said:

I'm sorry to hear that you are having so many physical problems right now,

I hope that your test results come back good and that you can eventually

get some comfort from your depression and other problems you are having.

Hang in there my friend and keep us posted how your results turn out. I'm

praying that your physical body can get some relief from your pains and

discomfort  

Thank you very much! I don't have much of a life anyway so I would rely on the things I had interest in. Now everything gives me a sad thought or I just don't care. I used to be a good sleeper, eater, loved music, looked forward to the holidays, etc - now all I do is wallow in depression and try to get through each day. Getting hard to try. 😞

Edited by MatthewPA

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I’m sorry you’re feeling this way.  I too have been depressed and not enjoying things for quite some time.

Your mother has no right to say what you can or can’t take. You are 42 years old. Why and how could she stop you?  This is for your own good.

Depression can cause all kinds of symptoms.  Good luck with your colonoscopy.

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17 minutes ago, 1966michigan said:

I’m sorry you’re feeling this way.  I too have been depressed and not enjoying things for quite some time.

Your mother has no right to say what you can or can’t take. You are 42 years old. Why and how could she stop you?  This is for your own good.

Depression can cause all kinds of symptoms.  Good luck with your colonoscopy.

I have to postpone it another week because I had no money for the prep stuff! Family environment is awful. I know but my mom hides it from me and I can't stop her.

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13 hours ago, SheWrites said:

Just a suggestion: Get another dog. I can't tell you how much my two cats help me. They get me through the bad days.

That's a good suggestion. I just don't think I can take care of one right now. My dad did a lot of the work with my last dog, and he can do less and less. 

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Every morning it's also a battle to get myself out of bed, and when I do I have little energy. Then for some reason I have to go to the bathroom after I get up. Terrible pattern and this is no way to live!

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I don't know what to do. The Ativan makes the tiredness and depression come out more, and no Ativan has me too anxious. I feel trapped. I tried 1/2 of a pill but then felt both anxious and more depressed. 

Edited by MatthewPA

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